I'll point you to the mirror

I keep checking to see if you have posted. Your last post was August. I went through and read all your entries from the past 2 1/2 years of your life without me. I want to read more. You censor things too well. I can't tell if you are hinting things about me or not. I like to hope they are. Have you moved on? Do you still think about me? I still think about you. I still dream about you. I haven't moved on.



Enough creepy.


I graduated in June and nothing to show for it. Im making about $2,500/month but I'm not proud of it. I want to make that much in a week. Or better, a day. I'm in the right industry to do that... but I need to get my ass out there and make it happen...captain.


I got a new car. Lets just say people want to race me now. Bad idea. I already got 3 tickets in a couple months. ha... vroom vroom mother fucker.


Ive never tried smoking weed. Anyone have a genuine, unbiased opinion on if I should try it or stay away from it?


Christmas is coming up. Im going to be turning 23. Yikes, I'm getting old. When is the crisp cold air going to hit my face? I'm sick of this "perfect" weather. Give me a nice refreshing rainstorm anyday (:


I moved into a house with Madi. A house house. 2 dogs. woof.


I'm telling you these things so maybe you'll figure out that this is me. If you still keep up with what I'm doing, you might stumble upon this and realize that this was my escape. But I've been here all along.






675 hit(s) (0 comments) | o  
Easy to the slaughter

He strokes his beard, his fingertips carefully flirting with his five o clock shadow.


I've missed you so much. I've been dying to tell you but it would ruin me. I can't hold it back much longer. Back into my self-destructive patterns I go.



The longer I sit here, the heavier this thought grows.

Am I in control, or living the path that my God chose?

157 hit(s) (1 comments) | o  

Life as I know it is currently rinsing the inside of the drains.

Lets pretend im a curious spider who hobbled into the shower. Master comes in, turning the water on forcefully sending me down the shower drain.

Its scary. Its dark. Its not the life I once knew. New and mysterious surroundings are the least of my worries however. Im struggling for my life not to drown.

It's so confined in these pipes. No freedom. No freedom. Not one drop of freedom.

When can I find the light at the end of the tunnle? When can I reach the ocean sewer? When can I be a part of the life I once knew?

1120 hit(s) (1 comments) | o  
fuck the pain away



510 hit(s) (1 comments) | o  

late night

driving home together

and at the red lights

press our lips together

we are in each others arms

just like a movie scene

and as were leaning in

the light decides to turn green

244 hit(s) (0 comments) | o  

Entry List
I've seen your sadness grow
the storm outside is brewing
the last time we had fun
I'll point you to the mirror
Easy to the slaughter
fuck the pain away
beautiful tragety
barking at clouds
the moments we live for
fall into desire
story of my...
speakith truth
sing for me
my backhand intentions
A poem
The last firstborn
It's not just you
Say no to drugs
Kiss me again
Our work of art
Let's hope
Forget it
New name
The struggle
Forever and a day
Uphill battle
Life as I know it
Lost boy
Letting go
Letter to Madi
Letter to Isabella
How could you?
Lowest low
a moment
52 post(s)