On Friday I went to a party, and it was so bored, i was sitting aroung with daisy, and she was happy bcuz she could talk with Dylan, but I was so damn bored. And then a couple of guys started talking to us, and one of them was nice, he was, well not completely hot, but he was ok, he had a lip piercing and another one on his tongue (hottttt), and he had cool hair… so daisy left me with the guy and he and I went for a walk, and then we sat there somewhere, and we made out, and it was so damn good!!!! Really, I never thought it was gonna be that good, but those piercing were ohhhhh so great haha, I had a good time, after all hehe. Yesterday I went to see harry potter!!!!!! It was so cool, I was wearing my harry t-shirt haha, and me and my firned were the first to enter, we waited for like 3 hours, but it was worth it, cuz I loved the movie!!!!

He’s not worth it, I’ve just realized that. Yesterday there was a party, and my friend went but I stayed home, cuz I thought it was gonna be bored. So, when my friend was at the party, I called him and he said that Edward was there (grrrrr), and I was so pissed off, bcuz I wanted to see him, even though I knew he would probably was gonna b indifferent with me. And today my friend told me that Edward made out yesterday with his ex-girlfriend….. and it just really hurt to me….. cuz that means that he doesn’t give a damn about me, and I was just wasting my time, thinking that maybe there could be a chance for us to “be”, and I just feel so stupid, (and broken-hearted); but it help me realize that he is not worth it… I’ll just try to forget him….. and leave with it……

yesterday i got my braces removed,YAI!!! now i can smile without looking as a retarded, lol (i just hated braces). now i can make a toothpaste comercial haha. i think im over the thing with edward, i dont think of him that much anymore, i guess i just realized that i couldnt do nothing to change his mind, and that i was suffering stupidly, so i decided to stop thinking of what could have happened, or what should i have done, or stupid stuff, and just focus on real stuff. but the hard part is that i still like him and still have feelings for him, but im gonna try to erase them just to fell better....

He’s ignoring me, he’s avoiding me, and I’ve barely talked to him this week. I guess it’s all over, well it never really started, but still I was hoping this time it would work out, but as always, it was just a another fucking one night stand, and I continue here alone, crying (well moaning) over past things….. and what hurts the most, is that he really put all my hopes high, I really like him, and it fucking hurts and makes me feel like shit, the simple fact that it didn’t mean a thing for him, he must be probably regretting it, or he has just probably forgotten it. I guess, I overreact, but it’s kinda making me sick the fact that I guy cant like me, or well THE guy I want….. And its just that that night I really felt him, he held me, and I felt like we were feeling it, but then again, we are reduced to silence, and he just ignores, just like last time…… it hurts, it hurts…… and I cant help it, I just want him….. if only he could love me…..i hate his fucking INDIFERENCE….

so mills, remember about the coolest evening on saturday, mills i cant stop thinking about him, about us hugging each other, he kissing me.... i totally like him.... and today well he said hello to me, and we kinda talk not that much, and he gave some money he owed me, and he gave me my umbrella back, lol... but mills the point is that i dont know if it was a one night stand, another one night stand, mills, i dont get him, he's the one that calls me, and i dont want him to put all my hopes hight if he doesnt want anything serious, i'll just have to wait... and see if he want something, or at least i want to kiss him again, hehe, he's so hot..... and i hate to fall for him.... i like him, damn......

oh mills, edward asked me out tonite (yai), and we went to buy some yummy malibu, and then we went to his house, and we sat and drank in his bed, listening to cool music, and kinda cuddling, and we made out again mills, it was so hot, it lasted like 15 minutes hehe, and he was awesome, oh mills ilike him, so badly, he's so sweet... mills he hugged me and kissed me like no one has ever done, and then he took me home, im so emo right now lol, mmmmmm i want him hehe

on saturday i went to a concert and it was so freaking cool!!!! my fav band played!!! i was in first row right in hte middle, and the singer recognized us (me and my friend), cuz we always go to their concerts!!! it was awesome, i loved it, i was jumping ans singing along, ahhhhh i cant wait for another!!!!

MIllsss, im falling for the guy, im falling for the guy, i cant help it, and i dont want, to cuz i know im gonna end heartbroken!!!!! i know he doesnt like me, and i hate it mills, i hate it, cuz i think im falling 4 him........ he makes me think of this lyrics.... "and the collision of ur kiss that made it so hard to leave" grrr im so emo lately, i want him, i want him, fuck u stupid!! im so stupid 4 falling 4 him

Heya Mills, i have like a million years without talking to u, lol. So, on Saturday, there was this concert, I was gonna go with 2 friends, but they told me they couldn’t go like 5 minutes before leaving, so I called another friend (a guy ), and he went with me. The concert was great, and then I went outside with my friend, and I dunno, we were playing, kinda flirting, and then we made out, and it was cool, (this guy was the one I made out with on the party, when we were both drunk hehehe), well but that’s not the point, the thing is that we made out, and it was fun; and after the concert we went for a walk, and it was raining, so he hugged me under the umbrella (sweet), mmmm Mills, it was cool. We latter went to the mall, and I bought some buttons (a 7up one, lol). And we walked at night al along the street, hugging each other, getting all wet, bcuz of the rain, and then on the bus we cuddle. He was really sweet Mills.., he walked me home, and then he kissed me again goodbye. Mmm, it was cool mills, I enjoyed, and I dunno if something is gonna happen latter on, but it was cool, at least I have the memory of a nice hot day, lol (that was sappy). He talked to me on monday, and yesterday and today, so I know that he’s not avoiding me, and that he doesn’t regret it, well I think he doesn’t, lol… hehehe, Well millie dear, that’s it for now sweetie, I’ll tell u if something cool happens k?, lovya

Oh millie i really really hate people!! There are these rumors in school that on Saturday’s party I made out with my friend, A GIRL!!! Millie a girl!, and that’s so NOT TRUE, I made out with a boy. And the worse thing is that the person that spread the rumors is a stupid bitch from 11th, and she’s talking and she DIDN’T EVEN SEE A FUCKING THING!!! Oh grrrrrrrrrr I hate her, she’s gonna pay, bcuz now everybody thinks its true. For example today, I was standing on the hall, and a guy from 11th walked besides me, and he whispered: lesbian! Oh shit I’m pissed really really pissed!!!!!!! GRRRRR FUCK U PEOPLE!

Millie im bored, its raining, the drops are so pretty, I wish I had a boy 2 make out with under this rain….. oh so beautiful….. u know, it’s nice to hear the sound of the rain when it hits the roof… I wanna kiss, im so bored…. I guess I’ll watch 10 things I hate about u, just to imagine a cool boy….. oh such a beautiful rain…… just feel the kiss of the water…… Whatever millie…

So millie, What a weekend i had!!!! (sighs) on friday I went to the movies with a friend (a guy). We saw such a shitty movie, but it was fun, and then we went to play this cybergames or whatever, and then we were there, and we kinda made out. I did it just for fun, mill, I DON’T LIKE HIM, well he’s not ugly or anything but I just don’t like him, and he likes me, and I felt like a whore, cuz I know that 4 me it was a one night stand, but he’s gonna think something else, hehe. And yesterday, oh yesterday, I went to a party. It was at the mountain, in a cold place, and there was music and vodka, yumm, I didn’t drink that much, but I was loaded, and then I saw my friend, he’s in 10th, and he was a little more loaded that me, so I took him 4 a walk, for him to feel better, and then, in the middle of the cold, the dark and the trees (haha it sounded cool) we started making out, oh millie, I don’t remember all, but It was the best kiss I’ve ever had, oh it lasted like “a longgg time” and then we made out again (I think, lol). My other 2 friends saw me, and the big problem, is that the guy I made out with, has a girlfriend, hehe, so we have to keep it in secret. But nevermind, I don’t like the guy either, he’s such a hottie and stuff, but I don’t like him, like to end heartbroken or anything, hahaha, it was just another one night stand, and I don’t wanna sound like a whore, well I’m not a whore, lol, but Millie it was so damn hot……..!

oh holly shit, im in trouble, my friends parents found out about the drinking shit on friday and now i think they´re gonna tell my parents unless i go and talk to them and tell them wht happened. i think im gonna go and talk, or i just wont show up and my parents may not find out, but if they do im so screwed so damn grounded, shit, fuck!!!!! MILLIE IM IN TROUBLE!!!!

so yesyerday i went to a friend's house, we were just a few, like 7 ppl or so, and we bought some vodka and we started drinking, it was so fun, and then we drank rum, hahaha we had so much fun, my friend was kinda drunk, but it was fun, and i think that i got too (millie i said too) close, with a guy, my friend, hehe, we dint kiss, but we got close hehe, well it was fun i enjoyed it....

TODAY IS MY 15th B-DAY!!!!! , so dont b bitches and say: HAPPY B-DAY 2 ME!!!!! So millie i’ve got this prob, there’s a guy in school, well in my class, and he likes me. He’s not a super hottie, but he’s cute, his eyes a hot, hot millie. Anyways, the guy is fun and stuff, but we’ve never had like long talks face to face, and besides, I dun know if I like him. I think I DON’T, but then I think how’d b like to kiss him or whatever, but I know that I couldn’t tell my friends about it, I know I couldn’t, bcuz all my friends like this “hot” OLDER guys, and I think they’d laugh at me or something. I don’t care about what they say, but im not sure if I like the guy though. I think I don’t I think I don’t, bcuz when I start thinking about it, I feel like im forcing myself and that a moment I think he’s cute, but then I think he’s not….. so I don’t know what to do???? Millie, I need help… (I’d post a pic of him here, but then u’d find out who im talking about, or my friends could just read the diary….. hehe) <3333

There’s not much going on, just the normal, here’s a poem, it’s called YOU’RE THE ONE TO BLEED My hand is shaking now that you’re finally in my bed I had put an anesthesia shot right through your neck, I take out the scalpel and start cutting what I need And I’ll wait ‘till you stat to bleed. And soon I realize the muscle I’m searching is old, It’s so wore out, rotten and cold, Probably you won’t need to go to the recovery room You are such a dusty body and I’ll have to use my broom. I was hoping to make you a transplant And see if my love machine would beat inside your chest, But you are so robotic, so static, so metallic And I am made of blood and flesh. I wont keep no resentments This is a homemade hospital and you’re on my surgeon chair, You’re sleeping because of your selfishness, The pain you put me through and the tears I shed. So, when I sew you back together You will be so stunned and unable to feel, And when you ask me what has happened I’ll tell you I took out your heart and put a metal shield.

Millie, today it was so weird. I was in biology class, and then the teacher said that we needed to bring a scalpel the next class, so I asked why, and she said bcuz it was really really sharp and we needed it to cut through a stem or something. But then I felt like some chills, and I imagine the scalpel cutting through my skin, and remembered when I used to cut, and I wished so bad to see blood, it was so weird, I was kind of hungry of blood, and now im afraid to buy the scalpel, bcuz Im almost sure that if I buy it im gonna cut, cuz im so thirsty of the red liquid, MILLIE, I DON’T WANNA BE A FUCKING CUTTER AGAIN!!!!!!

I can’t describe how u came, nor the way I was left, I can’t remember your name or the shape of your face, I still smell your smell; I can remember your taste, I can’t forget your hands, how they were like rain…. And if it makes u happier I can erase your presence I’ll rip my memory, and beg for the sun to rise up and shine, I can’t cry for your departure, or laugh for the way u stayed I still feel your kiss and your lips near my face… I can feel less sadder if u would stepped in my room, You would get a caress with your beautiful eyes shut, I cant close my fingers, they lore to be around yours You couldn’t be ugly darling; I can’t call you so… You were the tear before the wail, You were the screech before my death You were the sympathy before our love I can’t throw out our moment, cause downpour would fall over us….

i went to see CHARLIE AND THE CHOCOLATE FACORY!!!!!!!!!! ITS FUCKING AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!! I FUCKING RECOMEND IT TO U!!!!!!!!!