I kind of hate summer. It's a bit of a drag. In that weird "I'm not doing something, I'm a lazy ass" sort of way. So I'm trying to find a job. Becasue working is actually quite benifical for me. I started rereading Half Blood Prince the other day. Had much fun. Went to Macauley's last night, still haven't recovered. Happy songs, pretty pool, hot cocoa at three in the morning, lots of Chicago tunes, and an arguement over Riley. He's still mine. I'm so in love with you I'll be forever blue That you give me no reason Why you're making me work so hard That you give me no That you give me no That you give me no That you give me no Soul, I hear you calling Oh baby please give a little respect to me Soul, I hear you calling Oh baby please give a little respect to me

"Hip as in hypocrite and critically unaclaimed" I am a hypocrite. But I'm trying to figure out if that makes me hypocritcal if I call someone else a hypocrite, even if they actually are. Demo versions are better sometimes. Often, they are underproduced, which sounds better than overproduction. I'm so good at rambeling, I'm the next Oprah. Jesus and Moses action figures made me laugh. Toy stores are the most fun a girl can have without spending money. Bet you didn't see that one coming. As the master of all things unfinished, I am ruling over you. My foot is asleep.

So I went to the Old Port Festival. Watched some of Paranoid Social Club, got bored, then saw As Fast As. Wanted to go down to see Haven't talked Since and Stealing Skylite, but I couldn't. Made me a little sad.

Drama doesn't follow me, it rides on my back You know, if someone started a club of people who couldn't keep their fat mouths shut, I would definatly be president. Not sure who else would be in it, but I'd be the fucking prez. And I'd hate everyone else in the club, but I would be pissed, becasue I'm one of them. Yeah, obviously not the beswt of times. Not the worst, but not the best. Grrr.... I want chocolate. I should probably go for a walk. It's walking weather/mood. Me and my iPod. We make a good team. These calories are killing me Today was so confusing. Just....confusing. And fucked up. I hated it. I really did. Whatcha got now, gotta gotta give up Whatcha got now, gotta gotta give up Whatcha got now Whatcha got now

Eh, life is fairly uneventuful. And a note to the confused, anyhting I italizize at this point will be song lyrics, now that I have master HTML. Haha, movie about crazy people and aliens.

We're not talking. Words seem to slide off my tounge too easily for my comfort. this chaos, this calamity So I think I've talked, worried, wondered, and cried over you more than anyone else. I've blamed it on allergys. I don't want to leave school unless it's now. Bleeding isn't much fun the second time around. I dream in black and white. I hate you. This is the death of beauty Marshamllows are a bit dodgy, if you ask me. Moncho knows that men and women hump each other. Andres is going to marry a Chinese girl. Five bottles, five days of the week...coincidence? I think not. Apathy was so last quarter. Carousel next weekend TRADITION!!!!! Gloria, we lied, we can't go on Last senior day. We crowned Mary. "The one who sings prays twice." I cried. I cried. I cried. The doves have died, the lovers have lied

The drama is coming, the drama is coming!!! Actually, it's here, but that's not the point. I'm just thankful I have headphones and an iPod. And a dog that likes to be walked. I'm quite fed up with all of that shit. Maybe going public won't be so bad. What the hell am I saying? It's gonna suck. There's twice as much drama there than there is here.

Well, it's not my best work, but it is work. It's done, I'm now free to enjoy the last few hours of my weekend. Well, I did enjoy most of yesterday, so I guess this is what I get.

Why is it that I'm always the least inspired when I need to be the most inspired? I want to see a movie. Or maybe I just want popcorn. I'm not sure. Titanic made me cry last night, but Brokeback didn't make Bethie cry. She's strange. "Any practiced Catholic would cross themselves upon entering"

Tonight's top story... I've often wondered about kids at concerts. I know, I'm a bit young to be musing about this, but I do indeed wonder about the kids who come with their parents. No offence to the parents, but why take your kids to a show, spend a shit load of money, just to be dissapointed in a band that, with a little more research on your part, you could have easily avoided. I know my mom's said no many, many times. but seriously, listening to the bands lyrics can prevent a lot of hardship on the part of anyone and everyone who attends that show. And kids see all that shit on tv anyway, so calm down. In other news... The Old Port was home of what has become a Saturday ritual. Mexicali Blues was home of a dissapointment. My foot is home of a blister. Tonight's developing story... English papers are a bitch. Creativity should be bottled up and sold on the black market. My gum cracking is getting annoying, but I still do it. And now for a look at the weather... It was beautiful until it got dark. Then it got cold. The Birks have gone for their first walk, and a tank top made an appearance. Tonight's health beat... Walking is good for you. Do more of it. In sports... Rock-Off is tomorrow. Not sure what my attendance status is. In entertainment news... Hit the Lights has made quite the pissed-off, yet still melodic, pop-punk record. Buy it, enjoy it, and thank me later.

Modern slavery is a big problem. We're all slaves to the media, to society, to our friends, to our parents, to your lovers, to those who say they love us. We're all shackled to this prison we call life, and only death brings true freedom.

How the hell does someone lose a twenty dollar bill in the space of three days??? I need an explaination, becasue although I somehow acommplished that, I'm not sure how.

Despondent, distracted, You're vicious and romantic; These are a few of my favorite things. All of those flavors and This is what you choose: Past the blues, past the blues, And on to something new, Something real, make it timeless, An act of God and nothing else will be accepted. So if you're calling me out, Then count me out. Yeah, we're stubborn and melodramatic, A real class act. You see, I know a few of your favorite things. Five in the morning and all comes out pouring, Love, out the same way in. Something real, make it timeless, An act of God and nothing else will be accepted. Now if you're calling me out, Then count me out. Something real, make it timeless, An act of God and nothing else will be accepted. I said real, make it timeless, An act of God and nothing else will be accepted. Now if you're calling me out, Then count me out. Mm, mm, mm, mm. Mm, mm, mmmm.

My sleeping habits aren't what they should be. I mean, I fell asleep at.....1 am, I think? it could have been 2....not sure. But anyway, fell asleep then, and woke up at 12:30. Didn't feel right, if you know what I mean. Also bummed because Boston isn't Portland. That makes me sad. Boston should be Portland, and that way we'd have more moeny, but we wouldn't pay the highest taxes ever. That sounds like fun. Although taxes are pretty high here. I don't know how I know this. So I went and got an actual application. And it's scary. I don't know the laws, so I have no idea how many hours a week I can work. And then I have to figure out when school ends. I know I should know, but I don't. That's how apathetic I am about school. I don't even care when it ends. That's not a good thing, is it? No, it's not. I had fun reading non-academic books this vaca. I should do that during the weekends, when we don't have reading assignments. Yeah, like that ever happens.

I didn't die, I just got bored. So I finally own the Pink Spiders' cd, and it pwns. Now I'm counting down for the new TBS and now I'm in love w/ Hit the Lights, so that makes quite a long cd list, so far as I go. NC was fun, spent lots of time imagine people as disney characters. Yes, we are strange. We know this, and accept it. Yummy root beer that looks like real beer. Yummy tacos. Haha, Paco taco, haven't seen that movie in soo long, it makes me sad. Brendon Urie reminded me of Brendon Fraiser this morning, which in hindsight is a bit freaky. I should be writing, but my muse fails me.

slept til noon...that was fun. until i was woken up by the annoying asshole that is my cat. bitvh. nearlythrew her out the window. it's raining. which sucks becasue rain always makes you feel worse.

So apperently my gagging is for no reason. Maybe the doctor thinks I'm faking it. Or he's just confused. He told me to take sudafed and go home. Didn't work. Still gagging really badly whenever someone shows me food. or anything, really. I mean, i was gagging in relig, something that has never actually happened, no matter how many times I thought I would. Travis was on my case that I hadn't heard A&A yet. I'm lazy. and kinda pissed. stupid grown men can't stop holding grudges. GAG!!!! Just informing you that I was indeed gagging. Warm just like the winter, babe. I need a new card. my times already running low. Although I have to say, that lasted a rather long time. I feel so sick. and rather lonely. grrrrr. So I have ome to the conclusion....Heroine will be on the list. fun shit, man. fun shit. especially now that I know what the words are.

"You are everything I want cuz you are everything I'm not" @ David's yesterday got Jack's Mannequin started countdown for Louder Now 23 days "You hallowed out my hungry eyes" i fell asleep with my iPod on last night, and it never turned off i woke up and it was still playing it freaked me out a bit "I'll make damn sure the you can't ever leave" So i guess i have to start putting my make-up on in the bathroom bathroom mirrors suck i'm so smart i forgot my e-mail so much for all that jazz so i guess this means NC is this month sweet i need it after take-off, i actually find flying relaxing but that's about to be ruined i hate first time flyers i'm hungry three coffees yesterday wasn't enough get me food, Adam or just continue singing that works too i think i have strep it hurts for no real reason i want to see this video that would make me happy i saw the "rough landing, holly" video it was...interesting very "how close is close enough" ahhhhh last night's tea was good i should get more but that would require movement and i ain't into that at the moment

So this week has been sort of hellish. Can't really pinpoint why, but it wasn't a fun week. And I still don't know what the plan for Monday is. But whatever. It's not like I do't have time. Umm...I guess things are going smoothly overall. I mean, the movie project is getting past the fun part and into editing, which I hate, but whatever. Once we get past editing, I can jump in with music, which will be a challenge but not too bad a challenge. Not nearly as bad as those fucking subtitles were. My lipstick is running out. The red one. This makes me sad, but I also just inhereted two from Avon that my mother, for some unknown reason, though would look good on her. She just doesn't look good in lipstick. Lip gloss works. Her lips are too thin for anything else. So I'nm going to pubic school next year. Fun. Well, at least I can dye my hair. Maybe get my nose pierced. You know, Rebbeka had her nose pierced, and she's important enough to have dialouge in the Bible, unlike Joseph. We should be able to get our noses pierced.