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Friends of Shadowsoul

 
Everythings done so far.

Summer Holidays are over and now everything's a desaster. My wife and me organized a Holiday Camp for kids and teens in the last week of summer vacation. We got into a big fight and now it seems all broken -again-.

If it wasnt for the kids, id leave her, its eating my energy and happiness, to always argue and get blamed for everything.

This and that mixed up with old stories. It all makes me sick. But i cannot leave the boys. the little one is too young to be alone and the big one shall be on his own feet first.

Due to it's always my fault, whatever happened, i agreed to marriage counselling and aswell i'll do a therapy to clear my issues. On the one hand i think it will help me on the other hand i think it will not help my marriage.

Best thing would be: grab the kids and live with them alone and my wife goes into an ash ram or something.

im growing old lately. i feel old and i will never be as free as i wanted to be. But thats ok.

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Beyond the Sea

 

I've decided to have a bit of fun with my colour scheme, as the brown - whilst one of my favourite colours and reminiscent of the best of the seasons, autumn - has been unchanged for years, and I felt like trying a brighter update.

 

It's a bit day-glo for me, but I'm trying to expand my comfort zone slightly. Plus, sea blues and greens and beach themes feel peaceful to me. I need as much serenity as I can get. 

It was also very grey today, as it's been for some days, so maybe this will speed the sun's return.

 

I've a busy week ahead, and I'm wondering how I'm going to accomplish everything I need to. In addition to tidying and sorting everything from the move, I've also got commissions for a tattoo design and a flood of mini felt foods (which I design and hand-stitch). I love working on these art projects, I just don't always know where to start. Where the tidying is concerned, I just own too many things! I've done a fair job of collecting a donation pile, but I'm finding I still have a long way to go in terms of reducing.

 

Speaking of which, another area I need to again focus on is losing weight. Between Dec 2016 and Dec 2017 (in fact, year almost to the day), I worked incredibly hard and lost 7st 4 (just over 100 lbs). Unfortunately, the hols ended up being a bit rough emotionally, and this year has been one of the most taxing I've ever had; I got off track and started making poorer food choices and 'found' again 1 st 6 of what I'd lost. I've resolved to correct this, and I know I'll again be successful, I just need to properly apply myself.

 

This sort of public declaration is another way of ensuring I follow suit.

 

 

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