Heart is a funny thing to listen to
Listening to: Radio

Here again. 2017 is a crazy year and not only for all the politics and anger, brutality going on in the world.Something happened, what i never felt could happen to me. I fell in love with another woman. We just met due to a coincidence and wrote after that. We have written for about two months now, she has a daughter als old as my youngest son and she is as unhappy with her hubby as im with my wife. So there was a lot we could talk about.

We sent each others voicemessages in the morning and wrote secretly the whole day. I waited in the evening until my wife was falling asleep and then we messaged with each other. In the evening a 'visited a friend' and we walked her dog together in the park. We really fell in love like teenagers. It was wonderful and felt so right. My Wife found out, that we wrote and there was a big fuss about it and we nearly broke up - i guess we would have, if id said the truth, that i fell in love, but i didnt tell. After a while we broke up because i realised (and so did she) that it was not manageable to have love beside a relationship with kids. That realls feels like a bad Hollywood Romance in which nobody is getting the happy ending.

Ive felt more love in two months then in the last 5 years.

And yes, if you ask me honestly, i just stay with my wife due to the kids. There is no love anymore, not that one which is dancing to the heartbeat. Its the 'we got so used to each other, something would be missing' love. Weird.

Yes i'm a liar, but it never felt so right. Maybe it's because im turning 40 soon and this is my kind of midlife crisis.

My wife asked me to delete facebook, so i wouldnt be tempted to contact other women, hell yes: i did it and im not really missing it (fb), also it is quiet shitty that she is checking my cell for messages and whatnot. I cant't judge her for that, it's up to me to built up trust again. Weird times, never grow up. Becoming old, still searching for love.

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