I have fallen once more from the grace of God, All though there doesn't seem to be much grace to fall from anymore, I sinned and will not repent, I will die alone, A sinner not a saint like I could, There are many things I could do but choose not to, I could be great if I tried but I have made my own decisions and it seems this hole I am in is to deep to escape, And with everyday I slip further and further away, The one thing I want is distant yet always on my mind, Close but at the same time so far, The problem I have is in my head, So I try to drowned it out with the things i do, The cut, The jib, The pack, The bowl, All result in the cloud I blow, The feeling that comes next is hard to describe, The feeling of God with a dry mouth and no appetite, The dilation in your eyes and fatigue you feel, The withdrawal makes you want to die, And you promise yourself you'll never do it again but you know its a lie, I wish I could have my life back, I wish i could take control, But no one ever gets what they wish for, There's no Genie in this lamp, No three wishs for me, No storytale ending is in sight, But an ending of some kind is what I need, I still dont understand why I do what I do, I don't know if i really want to, I'm drowning in this, And i know there is no way for me to escape, I'm drowning in all the problems i create, Although I am not the only one at fault, I will take all the blame for what has been done, I have no other choice, Nothing makes me happy anymore, This is the last time i will ever bleed to feel alive, Because this is the last time I will bleed, My blood has all run dry

I'm sick of the life I lead, were nothing is right and i can't even see, you tell me i'm scared of life and I know your right, you can't see what you can't have but you can dream of a fantasy so perfect you don't want to leave, but life's to full of shit for us to just sleep, so can i pretend you don't exist for just 10 more minutes? so i can fall deep into my fantasy and dream of the lie's and the promises you couldn't keep, i'll take the light and put it to my head, i'll flip the switch and turn it off, so i can finally sleep, so i can finally dream