120:) MY B0YFRiEND HAS A B0YFRiEND!

Haha Carly's going with Dereck now. It's strange, but very cute. I think it's so weird because it's like karma; Carly and I are best friends, Dereck and Ashton are best friends. Wait lets color code this one so no one gets confussed. Carly and I are best friends, Dereck and Ashton are best friends. Ashton and I went together; and now that we broke up we can't stand eachother. Now Carly and Dereck are going together. So now I'll be seeing more of Dereck and Ashton will be seeing more of Carly. So that means Ashton and I will be seeing more of eachother. Do you see how this is working out now? It's karma I tell you. anyways .. Well yesterday I was with Carly most of the day, and Dereck was over. Wanna know what we did; well I'm gonna tell you anyways so it's your lucky day. (I'm in a pushy mood.) We found me a bed set from Delia's (aka: fav. shopping source of Laura and Carly) Then I went to dance for Cailini, and then they went to Carly's solo practice. Then we moved a bed at my house, and went outside to play with chalk. It's still out there from yesterday, and might I say I am an amazing artist! Then they cooked me dinner at Carly's, my mom made them take care of me. And we watched 'Without a Paddle'. Oh and last night my parents took me to see 'Little Women'. Before going I knew it wouldn't be anything that I really would want to see, but I wasn't going to complain because that's what gets me into trouble. But anyways it wasn't that bad afterall. And umm.. last night was good too. ♥ Laura I'll be your best kept secret and your biggest mistake
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119:/ 0LD NEWS

So for the UPDATE : Lauren and I are officially no longer friends. And this time it was agreed on, it was something I wanted and she wanted. I'm sick of having the same gay fights for the same gay reasons. We were friends for way too long and that's just what happened. We just got sick of eachother I guess. And instead of it being something that we were proud of, a friendship that we wanted, it was more like something that we had to do, like we were forced to be 'best friends'. So no instead of being 'best friends' we're not friends at all. And I don't think that I ever imagined myself saying this but, I am totally okay with it. And I don't hate her; I don't want to start any drama. I feel like I'm breaking up with some guy, for an actual good reason. We are just two different people and that's okay, just our personalities don't mush well.
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118:D FGT-NESS R0CKS!

Okay well I know it's been a long time since I've updated. I miss the internet. My computer had a gay virus and umm .. it's still not fixed but I know how to get around it now. UPDATE: Well I'm sick. I have tonstleitous.. I sware I think the doctor made that one up just so we could pay her! But yeah I'm really sick, and I'm not allowed to go to school or dance for a little bit. How gay! I know! The carnival was this past weekend. LOVE! It was so much fun! This carnival was probibly the best one I've had in a really long time, and the first one in three years that I've been single throughout the entire thing. That was fun! Well it's late , and I really don't have enough energy to finish up on all the details .. but lately lifes been g o o d! ♥ LAURA
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117:) i L0VE LAUREN

WHAT'S SHAKING? Lauren and I had a talk yesterday. Mostly about our friendship and how we both have to change for the better of the friendship. It's been fourteen years, and I don't want to end it just because the two of us are stubborn. I'm willing to change for that. :] I wanted to go somewhere tonight. Maybe go to the movies tonight. But I can't find anyone to go with. Carly never called me back, what a bad boyfriend. :[ So I don't think that's going to happen. Whatever it's okay, I'm good with having no life. Tomorrow my dance group is comming over so we can make shirts. :] They're going to look real pretty. Promise! I'll take a picture when mine's done and I'll post it. well I'm out .. and not very about ♥
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116:) BETTER NiGHT

Well I guess you can say that tonight was a better night for me. Dance was good, no one screamed at me for being 'abnoxious' tonight :] umm .. Practice was good too. Next Friday is our first Pep-Rally before competition on Saturday and Sunday. So this Sunday my dance group is comming over my house so we can make shirts. It's TRADITI0N to have shirt making at my house. And whoever doesn't find time in their plans to make it it's ALS0 TRADITI0N to all put in effort to make their shirts hideous. :]!! Hehe .. Shaun is a victim of last years .. and so is Donna. hehe :P umm.. I think that Lolo and I are fighting. I have no idea why. She wouldn't tell me. I know that she's mad at me for being friends with her ex-boyfriend, Sperm. But I don't think that's it. Because if that is it, it makes absolutely no sense .. being that she's friend with my ex- boyfriend, Ashton. So that would make her a deffinite hippocrate! So, I'd really like to work out whatever is going on between us, real soon. Tomorrow afternoon, I have to go to DANL for Calini practice. I have to go through B00T CAMP with Michelle. I love it how she gets so nice around the teachers/parents. Whatever .. in my personal opinion .. I think she's totally f a k e . ♥
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115:/ N0THiNG T00 NEW

Umm .. it's been a while I know. I'm sorry, I've been slacking. :[ .. I'm lame. I know. Anyways, nothing has been going on in my life except the stuff from before. And the stuff from before is actually getting to be pretty g a y! But whatever .. I've made things worse as of lately .. and way more complicating than it should be. Dance is getting on my nerves. Ricardo yelled at me tonight for not sitting on the floor and he said I am 'so abnoxious'. Whatever, I don't take it personaly; I've never liked him. I think he's an amazing dancer, but he has favorites, and he hates me because I ask too many questions. So tonight I didn't ask any questions even though I was totally confussed. And what does he do, still find S0METHING to yell at me for. Whatever .. gay . Well I'm out - PEACE
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114:/ MHM .. LiFE

mhm.. life ?!.. Today we had SH0WCASE at Teravella H/S - umm .. our costumes are still hideous .. but I s u r v i v e d. We ripped holes in our lyrical brown 'tree' costumes; so they'd have to waist money trying to fix them. hehe :] bad we know but when it comes to drastic measures .. revenge it is. My lift went okay - I didn't land it too well; but I got around. In lyrical I missed a turn; I just like stood there while everyone else around me turned. And I was in the front row! :[ b a d n e w s!! I'm probibly going to be in a lot of trouble. And in hip hop parts of the beginning I forgot but it wasn't too noticible .. I hope. umm .. well lately I've been having these annoying, yet random knee problems. And tonight it got r e a l l y bad. When I bend my knee back and forth I can feel my cartalige out of place or whatever. My dad had me ice it and stuff. But I can't put wait on it. I don't know what's gonna happen. Because this is starting to become a frequent thing for me. And it's annoying.
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113:( I QUiT LiFE

WHAT IS THIS UNFAIR THING WE CALLED LIFE? AND WHERE DOES REALITY STOP AND THE FANTASY START TO KICK IN? I'm so pissed right now! I just got back from dance. I had to endore 3 hours of trying on two costumes one being an okay one [production of coarse] and one being the one that made me flip out [lyrical shouldn't make us look like trees] Okay it's h i d e o u s ! I feel like I'm a joke dancing in it. Like I'm not worth a real costume. This is unbelievably GAY! I mean we pay real good money for these damn costumes and you know what; I'd be willing to pay more to get something better than the crap I've been having to deal with. If I thought the costume was worth it. I'm intirely fed up. It's been three years of this. And this year had by far been the worste and most tiresome. first year: TAINTED LOVE 'I wanna .. runn away .. from my costume' Yeah, they were hand - me - downs.. Stella didn't want to eat her money for it. It was major bull! But we dealt being that it was our first year we wanted to make a good impression. second year: HIT THAT/I BELEIVE Those costumes weren't too bad. They were reasonable and they actually kind of matched our dance a little. And our lyrical were good too .. this year: JUMP/THE LIMITS OF LOVE HIDEOUS! Jump .. black and red .. we look like goths who can't afford better material than cheap velvet. Limits of Love .. BR0WN! & GREEN! they are disgusting and we look like f*ing trees! They're horrible and that's the costume that got me so worked up!! I'm just so pissed ..
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112:) TUESDAY'S ARE N0THiNG SPECiAL

Okay well I think I'm about done with this one. This is his weeks notice. And I'm moving on. I think the best thing for the two of us is just to be friends, even though it's way boring like that. Today was nothing s p e c i a l . It actually went kind of slow. I had to limp from class to class because of my gay heal; that no one cares about. And yeah .. I looked waisted today! But whatever I really don't care - b u t - yeah I do. I don't know. Anyways - so today instead of having my friend shadow me, she shadowed Shannon. But Shannon let Alex sit with me at lunch, so that was cool. Yeah well I have ballet tonight, and I think our costumes are comming in. Or at least I hope they are.. SHOWCASE is on Sunday!! So not ready for it at all!!
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111:/ Y0UR KiND 0F GAY!?

This morning I got to ballet an hour and 5 minutes late; because my mom though it started at 10 and it actually started at 9. So yeah .. I didn't understand that untill I realized class was over at 10:30 .. so Valerie, Donna, and I went to Taste of the City and then when I came back to the studio. Stella was like 'Laura, do you want to be kicked out of company? You've missed 4 Saturday ballet technique classes, and the limit's 3.' andshe didn't even give me like time to explain .. so I just left out of the room. So then I got in the car with my mom and I told her and she got really mad. Because it's not like I drive, and it's not like dance is my whole life, I mean my family has other important things to do on some Saturdays. So yeah I don't know this year I'm just not impressed at all by whats going on at Stella's it's unbelievably redicules. I don't know what to say about it to tell you the truth.
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109:) G00D M00D?!

I have no idea why .. but today I've been in such a good mood. And like it lasted all day! So weird.. I think it's the medicine that I'm on. Anyways ..umm school was o k a y today. Tonight I have an mandatory extra rehearsal for ViRUS .. mhm .. we're supposedly changing like 50% of our whole dance even though we only have one week to: ♥ learn the whole dance ♥ do costumes ♥ clean the dance ♥ have all of the music done whatever... I'm just so fed up about how this year; dance wise; is just sqrewed up. 1. our costumes for JUMP are hidious and they're nothing like what Jen designed 2. from what I've ehard every costume is gonna come out that way 3. we pay like $130 for our costumes for company in the beginning of the year and what our costumes look like .. I can make them for $10 .. and I can't even sew 4. our Hip-Hop dance isn't even d o n e! It just feels so unorganized and I thought that we'd be done with the costume drama now a days since this is our third year as a group together .. I can sort of understand our first year [plus we sucked] but now it's just gay! UGH! I feel like they don't even care .. and you know what it's true as long as they're making their money off of us they don't have a reason to. But they're supposed to, it's not fair!
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107:( FREAK 0UT!!

At the present moment of time I am what you can say officially freaking out; I'm about to have somewhat of a panic attack! I keep on looking out the window to see if the car drives by. The cell phone's off! No word! .. I'M PANICING and I have every r e a s o n to do so! .. I need something to occupy me.
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106:) WH0'S G00D?

MHM .. Laura es muy confused! I just don't know .. Today was the funeral for Papa Lenny. Kayla and I sang; so she slept over last night. And then Lauren came. and even though sometimes we say some pretty shitty things about eachother; we really are meant to be best friends So then afterwards all of these old people were like attaching me and telling me how much I've grown. Most of them being my relatives whom I've never met. And then they say "I haven't seen you since you were about 5 years old, my you've grown." And how am I supposed to respond to that because what I want to say is : "Well being that we're family you should have seen me probibly at least twice between the time I was 5 and 14. And what do you want me to do; stop growing until the next time you come and see me. Because if that's what you were hoping for I'd be 5 for the rest of my life. And I'd have to wait for someone in the family to fricken die before I'd get to grow.' Whatever that side of the family is just w a c k e d out when it comes to that type of stuff. Now we're all back at the house and a lot of people are here. Lauren's in my bed sleeping; and Kayla had to go back to school right after the funeral this morning. Now I guess I have to go back to enterataining these people. no one comes out of this alive
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104:( WHAT T0 EXSPECT?

Well I know I've experienced many deaths; especially in the family. But this one is just weird. Because I never actually pictured him dieing. I don't know eve though he was old it was a shocker to me. I don't know i'm just GAY! blah.. Well.. Everyone is invading my house .. and tacking over!! When I woke up this morning like 4 people were here! What's up with that shizz? Anyways so right now I'm with Daniel my love .. lol .. well I'm being too weird for words!! hehe :] out ♥
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102:( N0 0NE C0MES 0UT 0F THiS ALiVE

My Papa Lenny always used to say 'No one comes out of this alive' Well now that once said quote; applies to him. As I was getting ready to go to the mall for tonight at Lauren's my parents came to the door. It shocked me and I immediately knew something was wrong; being that they came home a day early. And I was absolutely right. My Papa Lenny went to my Auntie Susie's house last night and had a massive heart attack after telling a joke; the one thing he loved. He was in the hospital on life support and still is at the present moment. But tonight our family decided that it's best to take him off life support and let God take his life into his own hands. The whole family came in; and the cousins are comming in for the predicted funeral. I came home .. my parents are still at the hospital. I'm just so tired and I need to take my mind off of things.
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101:) i STAY AT L0L0'S CASA

Well right now I'm at Lauren's it's not as bad as I thought .. we haven't actually had a fight yet. 0MG! Today on the bus ride home Jared and Dereck were like ganging up on me. :[ They gave me titty-twisters and Dereck gave me a thong weggie !! anywhore .. Well tonight I have dance .. only 3 more practices [including today] before SH0W-CASE! We have so much to work on for our dances! I think I like those walks under the moon; and those moments under that tree ♥ LAURA
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100:) JUST CAN'T HAPPEN

Just don't Plan things Your BAD at it Well last night I guess you can say that me dreaming the impossible, was a waste of a dream. It really was impossible for last night :[ Well tonight's the last night at home for me. Tomorrow night I stay at Lauren's house untill Friday night. I don't really mind it that much. But she sure doesn't seem to want me to come. Today on the bus she was like 'Laura, why do you have to stay with me?' It's kind of, well actually is really for a best friend to have a reaction like that! Aren't they supposed to be happy to spend time with you and all that good crap? Whatever .. She's so complicating. I love her but she acts like she hates me. And I don't like to hear that she talks crap behind my back. And she doesn't trust me even though she should. And I don't feel that I can trust her either because of what happened before. It just shouldn't be like that. I'm starting to think that maybe .. us being 'BEST FRIENDS' is really just us labeling ourselves to be that way because we've known eachother for so long we just grew to it. :[ ? I don't know .. I guess I'm jist dissapointed ♥ LAURA
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99 :-* DREAM THE iMP0SSiBLE

Well THE KID might have a surprise for me :] Can't exactly say w h a t .. but a surprise might be in store for Miss. Laura! - I'm dreaming the i m p o s s i b l e tonight boys
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98 :) HAPPY NEW YEARS H0ES!

HAPPY NEW YEARS! Last night was wild with Carly. The boys were being ultra gay but it's okay, they're just immature .. even though they're older than us? But Jonny was okay, I can handle him. And whenever he picks on me for something I just say 'you know there was a time where you actually liked me and hooked up with me, remember that?' .. then most of the time he just shuts up. :] I haven't really thought about my NEW YEARS RES0LUTI0N but I guess since it's officially 2006 today, I should make one. ♥ 0kay I want to become a C0UNTRY SINGER♥ 0kay I know it's a bit, unrealistic. And it's deffinately not something that can magicly happen over night; it's something you have to work hard on. So that's what my RES0LUTI0N is : to work on becomming a C0UNTRY SINGER S0.. 1] I'm gonna get serious about singing 2] I'm gonna get a voice teacher 3] I'm gonna stay in my chior class at school 4] I'm gonna work harder in dance so I can become a better all around dancer and in shape 5] I'm gonna write songs and work harder to complete them and to work on the music not just the lyrics WELL .. My other NEW YEARS RES0LUTI0N is : to not be so desperate, and to gain more patience when it comes to boys and love I don't need to be so .. like '0MG! I NEED A B0YFRIEND RIGHT N0W 0R LIFE'S GAY!' I know that I can have a lot of fun without a boyfriend around, or even having a boy there. I know how to have fun with my friends, I just need to prove it to myself; and not be so neggative.
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96 :) PLANS?

I don't know if I have plans for tonight or not. I am so confussed! I just want to go to the movies!! 0kay this is kind of weird but .. lately I've had the urge to do bad things more than usual .. I don't know I think , well I don't actually know what I think but yeah.. :] I'm just a confussed little girl at the moment. And I don't even think that Carly can come with tonight, so I'm gonna bring Erica, I was gonna bring her anyways but not it's all gonna be weird! UGH! Carly's a non-sufficient 'boyfriend' YEAH! Well hmm.. I think I'm done with this entry -only 1 more day untill NEW YEARS-
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