www.sitdiary.net/katgirl - (Last 5 Entries) http://sitdiary.net/katgirl/ A feed of katgirls diary entries on sitDiary. Fri, 23 Feb 2018 9:09:01 CST http://www.sitdiary.net/ http://sitdiary.net/katgirl/?cmd=view_entry&eid=22991 Fri, 26 Jan 2018 22:22:36 CST i knew it i knew it i knew it i knew it i knew it<br>i get my hopes up like a fucking idiot anyways and it's so fucking difficult talking yourself out of the worst case scenario when that's the only thing that ever happens<br>i&nbsp; knew it was going to be too good to be true and i knew it was never going to happen because it's never going to happen and i'm going to die alone with my cats because i can't love anybody else but you but i can't have you either and i'll never get to&nbsp;<br>i can't keep doing this i can't keep doing this i can't keep doing this i can't keep doing this&nbsp;<br>it's always going to be one thing after another there's always going to be another reason and it's just never going to happen so i don't know why i ever bothered hoping or telling anyone or saying anything because now i get to go around to everyone and take it all back and i don't want to i don't want to&nbsp;<br>i knew it i knew it i knew it<br>i never get anything [972] gotta get better http://sitdiary.net/katgirl/?cmd=view_entry&eid=22991 Sun, 21 May 2017 0:00:31 CDT okay so like<br>i'm tired of this fight and this conversation and going in circles about the same thing, repeatedly. like fuck, i wish i turned off message tracking so neither of us could see it and i'm sorry i didn't do it sooner because i bet anything if i had, it would be fine and you would have no idea and nobody would be saying shit.&nbsp;<br>but i didn't and wow surprise karma comes back to bite you in the ass. good lesson for me to learn i guess but fucking christ.&nbsp;<br>and yeah here is the problem: i think you're wrong about this and i'm not trying to gaslight you or try and convince you that you're crazy but i think you ARE oversensitive about this specific issue and i don't think that continuing to chew on it is going to help anybody and especially not us so can we just like, let it go? great, she doesn't care about your characters, guess what, i don't fucking either half the time, but i don't say that to you and technically, neither has she.&nbsp;<br>i'm just tired and i want to sleep and have date night without worrying that like, disagreeing is going to get me nailed to the wall. i love everything about you but this sure as shit is your worse trait.&nbsp;<br>like fuck i don't know what to say? yeah, she felt pushed out of your plots because so did everyone? we literally talked about this two weeks ago?? i'm sorry i can't condemn her for this because??? i didn't say you were fucking WRONG i just said that like maybe the truth is somewhere in between because it fucking is because everyone handled this situation poorly and like, i don't know, a modicum of fucking compassion or grace would go a long way<br>but sure we can keep going down this path and that's fine but i'm going to bed right now because i don't want to deal with it<br>okay good night<br>(i still love you but man oh man am i starting to realize why relationships are hard sometimes and this might be the first time i don't LIKE you) [971] woke the fuck up http://sitdiary.net/katgirl/?cmd=view_entry&eid=22991 Fri, 13 Jan 2017 1:01:12 CST okay yeah i'm fucking annoyed<br>i shouldn't have to ask &nbsp;every fucking time but sure whatever fine [97o.5] post script http://sitdiary.net/katgirl/?cmd=view_entry&eid=22991 Thu, 15 Dec 2016 1:01:59 CST it's the same girl, sitdiary. it's been the same girl for the last six years and it's gonna be the same girl for the next six and for every six years after that.&nbsp;<br>i just realize that the only time i write here is when i'm feeling lonely and so i guess i should just. i don't know. posterity&nbsp;or something. i used to write good things, but it's really the bad things that i feel like should be excised, you know? the good things, i want them to stay with me.&nbsp; [97o] i would give it all http://sitdiary.net/katgirl/?cmd=view_entry&eid=22991 Thu, 15 Dec 2016 1:01:22 CST "wow," says everyone, because everyone says it, "that's so far."<br>yes i fucking know how far it is and i fucking know that it's a long time and i fucking know every single other thing<br>here is the hard part and here is the worst part is that my mom didn't believe me when i said you were coming and sometimes i don't believe either<br>it's just hard some nights. i feel like maybe you're not real and if you're not real then we're not real and if we're not real then what am i? and i know that's not true but it feels true when it's 3 AM and i am just. here. alone. it's so hard to not feel alone when that's all i feel like i've ever been.&nbsp;<br>i love you i love you i love you i promise i love you more than anyone and i guess this is what people mean when they say sometimes you have to chose. i'm choosing and i want to keep choosing but i need something.&nbsp;<br>please god, give me something. i love her and i'll keep loving her so good but please, give me something. i am so tired of sleeping alone.