Listening to: Carpenters - Rainy Days and Mondays
OKay, I'm flipping out and having anxiety for HIS birthday! Is that juss a lil' weird or what?! I can't sleep and it's only Monday! It'll be a couple of days until his b-day ish over. Oh bother. Why do I flip out. I mean it's HIS bday not mine. HE's the one turning 18 not me. I don't wanna be 18. I don't wanna grow up and he does. You can't make me grow up, nuh uh. HE's the one going to work on his Bday, not me. HE's the one getting all the attention that day, not me. Oh bother. I hate having anxiety for others. But I only have it if it has to deal with me and somehow this does.
Sarah said that you had to remember those special events like EFY and Girl's Camp, those spiritual moments in life to get you through the tougher times in life. Because when you are in those tough times you don't really have the strength of feeling the Spirit again, so you have to remember when you did to give you hope. You know what I mean? I totally related to that b/c that's what I want my Girl's from camp to remember. Remember how you felt. That peace and joy.
Scott is sick. Really sick. He doesn't throw up, it's like dry heaving but it still brings the medicine back up. He keeps going to the doctor, they might think it's ammonia or something. Ick. He's turning out like his father and he's only 5!! It's bad having a sick 5 yr old in the house b/c nobody can sleep, everyone else gets sick, when he can't go to school someone else has to get off work to take care of him.
And the worst part is that his father isn't doing much to help him. He'll buy him medicine on Sunday and then go gamble with his buddies while we stay home with Scott. Ticks me off. Then this morning he wasn't even awake enuff to take care of Scott and the need was 2 times as great b/c he's sick. Then he packs the kid up in the car and takes him around until he comes back miserable and crying b/c he can't breathe and keeps coughing.
Oy vay. I could strangle something. Now everyone in the house is going to get sick. It's like a never ending cycle. I juss don't get the same things he does so I can keep going to school thankfully. He ends up throwing up or the flu or something I juss get a cold, fever and all.
It all kind of makes me sad. The sacrifices we all make for HIS kid. Jerk.
Good News and Bad News....
No school Tuesday and the boys Bday.
Tests (Exams) and Papers due this week in all college classes. Two of which I'd have to study my eyes out and still get a C in Nutrition and probably an F in 1050. I have to find time to study and figger out -how- to study for them. Meanwhile I have to write up a paper for Perky and read poetry. So much reading so much studying.
I hope I work this weekend.
More money to pay for Feburary events! Whee!