909
Listening to: Yellowcard - Big Apple Heartbreak
Feeling: proud

I climbed Red Rock in Draper last night in the semi-dark.  It took me forever to get there because of traffic, hence the rocking climbing in the dark.  It was a lot more nerve wracking than the first rock I climbed.  I guess the other place we climbed the rock was more slanted than straight up and down. 

Sarah went up before me for her first time and it took her forever (again hence the dark) and on the way down her foot got caught, but the belayer was watching and caught her so she could get her foot unstuck and continue.  As my luck would have it on the way down my stuck got stuck also, cept it got...really stuck. 

The belayer (not John) wasn't really watching and I yelled but by the time she caught me I was pratically upside down. And she couldn't pull me up obviously.  This rock was just in the shape of the heel of my shoe, just perfect to get really stuck.  It wouldn't go straight up, not that I could lift it straight up with me being upside any way.  It wouldn't come straight out or I might flip.  So I'm trying to hop up on one foot and pulling at my other foot.  I decided the shoe was going to stay there whether or not my foot was in it, so I figgered that I might as well take my foot out of the shoe.  Now my shoes were tied pritti tight in order to climb, you see.... I managed to get my foot out and then I still had a struggle getting my shoe out of that rock. Tug and pull with one foot hopping and bright pink sock on the other.  Slightly ridiculous. Hopping sideways on one foot trying to hold the rope and tugging at a shoe at the same time.  Then once I got it out I had to put it back on.  If you thought you need a stable something to balance you when you are standing straight up and down trying to put one shoe on, try doing it sideways on a rock with an unstable rope to hold you while you hop into your shoe.  

They all watched from the ground.  Watched me get stuck, watched me fall a lil' more as my balayer wasn't really paying attention and watched me hang for a minute with one leg straight in the air.  Watched me manage to hop around sideways on the rock. Watched me tug my leg around getting no where.  Watched me tug at the shoe itself once I got my foot out.  Watched me hop around trying to get the shoe back on.  Watched me finally get to the ground. 

They were all proud.  Me being an unexperienced climber and climbing the rock 'blind' and hanging upside down falling out of my shoe on the way down.  I thought the time of night was perfect.  I didn't think it was blind. It's really just you and the rock, you only need to see a couple feet in front of you to plan your moves and even if you don't have that you gotta go by feel anyways.  I didn't feel blind or challenged in that way at all.  My legs weren't shaking to death when I got down. The only thing that hurt were my swelling hands (rougher rock) and a lil' of my forearms. I think I'll survive physically from that climb.

The only doubts I had were "I wonder what living creature is in this hole that I'm about to stick my hand in....."  

I got down from the rock and texted some ppl I thought might care about my activities that I was proud of.  My dad just wanted to know if I was climbing rock in the dark by myself. Oy.  Mindy said that she's tired and not functioning normally, and of course, Mom didn't answer.  NOT EXACTLY what I was looking for when I expressed my proud moment of climbing blind.  Levi was the closest I got to a Yay! He said "very impressive". 

"Where are you? I need you!  You still have...have my heart!"

Sometimes I check out magazines from the library just to look at the ads and try to guess what the ad is actually advertising.  Sometimes I can be WAY off on the product being advertised with all the distraction of the giant bootys or clevage.  And then some of the ads I never find out what they were getting at....

Grandma gets to go to Hawaii for her birthday!  80 years old and her first time out on a plane and across an ocean to Hawaii!  Yay!  Jealous. Her favorite daughter with lots of money is taking her and a slew of others.  Ya see, when she vacations with us she gets shoved in a car or motor home for hours and hours of driving.  With her rich daughter she gets to go on a plane! I think she'll enjoy it and realize her mistake of vacationing with poor people. 

I think it's official.  Grandma has decided to retire this winter.  I think we all have this guilty feeling about this retirment deal.  I mean, we all encouraged her to retire, we all want her to stop driving esp in the winter, we all know she gets tired, and now that she's finally did it.....we're all....now what?  It feels like we pressured her into going to a retirment center almost, taking all her freedoms, all the things that keep her going and moving, taking things away from her like friends, driving, financial stability, and shoved her in a room and said stay.  Which we...really kinda did.  Put her in her house and said don't move making her totally dependant on others which we know she HATES.  

It just feels weird.  I know WE didn't make the decision, but we encouraged it and now it's going to happen and we all feel guilty of whats going to happen next.  We know she's gonna go mad with boredom. She'll have all this freetime to go visit family/friends, but we know she's so stuck in her ways she won't leave the house. 

And I just left her house so now she's super completely alone ALL the time.  I feel bad about that, but at the same time I think she'd drive me mad if I knew she was at 'my' house ALL day long and I might be her only interaction.

We feel better knowing that WE didnt make the decision....we just pressured her into it.  Now she has to deal with the consequences whether it be boredom, dependency, or lack of interaction...but it's good for her, in a way.... There is a point where you shouldn't be driving up a giant snowy hill every day to go to work, there is a point you shouldn't be driving period!  I'm sorry Gma!  I know you loved that and you're still going to fight for your freedom!  But I think its for your own good! 

Anyways!  I'm stealing money from the bank today and buying a pink DS player with 85 games morrow!  eee!

Meanwhile, back at the ranch, John is still asking me for a date.  Patience my dear.  I figger we might as well get this over with.  I told him ONE date.  Then all the days he was free I said I was busy.  But we finally fought a mutual non busy day.  We'll see how this goes.  He won't tell me where we are going.  He said it was a surprise, but that usually means "I don't know, YET".   I hope its somewhere scary.  Like a haunted forest or manison.  mwhahaha!

 

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001 - Year 2005
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