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Feeling: triumphant

Okay Okay I only write in my journal when I have something to complain about. 

I did have a good day like two days ago and thought about writing about it but there wasn't much to tell.  But now that a few more things have elapsed that I can complain about I have more to say, and boy, do I write it all down and create a big novel to read each entry huh?

Anywho.  My roommate Cassie and the way she handles her dog Bella is driving me nuts again.  Bella is a small mutt, a mix of dogs, and is not an outside dog. "I'll put Bella outside while I'm at work.  She likes it"  I'm pritti sure she's never been outside all day long, like ever.  She's been in an apartment the last few years or inside a giant mansion of a house before that.  Now here she sits outside in my tiny backyard and hears all the scary noises the winds creates, feels the cold wind and rain, and sits in the mud.  I'm sure -anyone- with feelings and opinions prolly does not like that combination of wind, rain, and mud. And even if she did I would not enjoy the feeling of having to bath her everytime I let her in the house overnight. 

The other night I let Bella out to go potty and to get to know Evan and she went potty and we were playing with her in the house and Cassie comes home a little while later and tries to get her to go potty while we watched a movie.  They came back in and Cassie put Bella in her cage thing all night long.  Didn't know why.  I asked the next morning why and Cassie said Bella didn't go potty. I'm like...uh, hello I was right there playing with her didnt you ever think I let her go out potty?  So I told her I took her to go potty.  Cassie said she felt bad.  Yeah, well, she should.  And it kinda made me cry a bit b/c Bella didn't get to sleep with her and it was my fault.  Bella had like an hour to stretch out before going back into the cage for the next 10 hours.  It makes me mad sometimes.  She should feel bad dangit!

Last night we discussed the weekend and weather.  She asked me to watch Bella because she was going up north all weekend.  Oh look she thought about Bella ahead of time and for more than 5 minutes. I said I'd watch her if I could take her with me where ever I go.  She said yeah.  She asked about the weather and I told her it would rain for the next couple of days, prolly til Tues.  And then later in the convo she declares she'll put Bella outside morrow while she's at work, "cuz she likes it".  I'm pritti sure I mentioned it raining more than once to Cassie.  Sure enough, the next morning she got up earlier than normal and put Bella outside and went to work.  Normally I leave before her, but thankfully, this time I got up second and put Bella back inside as it started raining. 

Seriously.  You can't in good faith look at the sky and think "it is not going to rain today".  And I know I have mentioned that my yard, being without grass, is just a big mud hole after it rains.  Grr. This time she didn't even put the cage out there, just sat her in the dirt (soon to be mud) cuz thas as far as the leash would go.  That dog is NOT an outside dog and has NO protection from the elements whatsoever.  You have to be slightly stupid to let that be okay in your head.  I mean even putting the dog outside in the blazing hot summer you still need to give her water and shade!  So after asking me to babysit the dog for the weekend she seriously put the dog out there to be muddy, wet and cold when I get home from work and have to wash her myself?  Excuse me?  Hello? 

I was kinda mad.  The poor dog.  I went outside to get her and the wind was blowing a tree into the fence and the fence was making groaning noises and she looked at that fence like she was gonna die!  She came to me and tried to bypass me and get in the house but her leash wouldn't allow it. She looked at me like please let me in, its scary out here. I took one look at the sky and let her in. Sure enough, by the time I left the house it was a steady rain outside. 

Ironically, when we were talking about weather we both declared we didn't like the wind.  We could do snow or rain, but not wind.  And the next morning she puts her dog outside in the wind and claims 'she likes it'.  What happened to the Golden Rule?  How would she like it if it were the other way around and Bella put her outside in the wind just before a storm?  I dunno.  I can imagine Bella not liking the same weather patterns as humans do not like.  Thats not too much to ask. 

But frankly, I am kinda glad that I get control over Bellas well-being this weekend, mainly cuz I know the weather and know what Cassie would do to the dog, or not do for the dog. But now I'm in charge I get to decide!  mwhahaha.  It makes me feel better about this weekend, even if I don't go home. Victory!  I get the dog! 

Then, on another front, Evan kinda drove me crazy and showed the true side of himself once again. The main question I ask is if you were to leave somewhere and you didn't know if you were coming back what would you want to say/do with your loved one before you left?  AND I would propose another question would it make a difference of what you'd do/say to your loved one if you knew they were coming back?  And who is your loved one?  Some would say bye to girlfriends, family/sibilings, their mommy, their wife and kids.   So assuming wife or girlfriend would to SAY things, like goodbye and I love you, or would you rather DO things before you go?  What would you want to remember from that person?  The things they said to you or the things they did to you that night before you left?  Well, Evan pritti much showed that he'd just want to see and touch and do.  He wouldn't really care about the words so much.  Of course, he'd say them cuz its socially expected, but he'd rather do stuff before he or I left.  Thas is how he would like to remember me. That pritti much sums up my anger.  I accused him of this being his real side and he, of course, denies it but he basically just proved it to me right there.  I said we wouldn't see each other until Mon of next week as he was leaving my house, so I was saying bye and hugging him and all that jazz and there he goes getting all touchy feeling instead of saying bye.  Totally ruined the moment. Its like he wont be sad if he can touch my boobs.  Oy.  "This is how I want to remember you until you get back"  You can't sit there and deny the prove you juss supplied. That is soo not the kind of guy I want to be with.  I understand the sexual part of a relationship, but when your parting and its a time to show yer true love in case that person doesn't come back.....  whatever. 

And on top of all the anger and annoyance at everyone else.... I'm kinda freakin out about this Lasik surgery!  One more week!  These glasses are driving me nuts!  Well, not as much as I thought they would. They haven't been hurting my big fat head too much cuz I have the frames bent out as far as they would go without breaking hahaha. And I think my perm is dying. Its been four months. 

Oh, Just have to have a side note here.  I talked to me Mum on the phone the other day and expressed opinions about each of these different situations in my life and she gave her opinion and/or advice and to sum up the convo I realized she didn't give ONE positive or encouraging word about each of those situations.  This is what I grew up with.  This, I believe, is the way her marriage has shaped her into.  I tell her about my issues with my weight and exercise and she basically confirmed I have no waist so therefore I have a big gut and giant hips.  I feel better about myself already. I expressed my nervousness for Lasik and she confirmed that I should be nervous cuz I might come out blind.  Gee thanks.  I expressed my annoyance of my roommate and had hope that she would calm down and be less...annoying and immature.  And mother informed that she would not calm down and would stay this way through the duration of her stay at my house.  Oy.  "Gee, thanks Mom, I think I'm gonna go now...."  But she has always been one of those "hurry up and get over it" kinda of girls.  Example:  if I just had a breakup; her response; 'It was a good thing you broke up.  You'll live.  Get over it".  Always a source of comfort, my mother. 

Oh and Min and Claine had accepted a military job in Maryland, but it being the government and military involvement that job 'fell through' and they are no longer planning on moving to Maryland. That means my dog Max gets to stick around with me longer!  No stress about him for now.  That also means they need to find a bigger place and soon cuz they can't fit in that house very well anymore!  My baby girl needs a crib now!  You can imagine how many people are glad their only neice/granddaughter is not being taking away to the east coast!  I am one of them!  

 

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001 - Year 2005
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