Yesterday I felt very confrontational.....
I mean I wanted to fight. I wanted to pick a fight with anyone, anywhere.
I just wanted to give off attitude and not let someone walk all over me.
I think its part of the irritatable part of depression.
So fighting with the dog has proven unsuccessful.
And the only other one I have contact with for long periods of time is the boss.
I didn't think that was a good idea.
But yesterday he did something that juss ticked me off and I was sooo ready to chew him out.
But he didn't come back from court for like 4-5 hours so I had time to cool down.
By the time he came back I just wanted to go home.
Instead of the lazy, juss wanna go home, I dont care attitude like I had Mon, I juss wanted to tear something apart, I just wanted to shove something, I wanted to scream and get all up in someones grill. I wanted to be mean.
So then I went to Zumba and was reminded how much rhythm I lack.
I have not shook my butt that much in years. I've never felt so much fat jiggle all at the same time before. I have not twisted per say my body that much in years. Needless to say my digestive system did not react very well to this new activity.
But it was fun, it seemed to cool my confrontational hopes, and it gave me energy. I did things after that class at 9pm that I would never do in the last month without exercise.
And since I don't have a separate religious journal, ya'll get to hear my religious rants and fav scriptures. And if I did have a separate journal for religion I would start it off with these scriptures:
My favorite one to start off a journal with... the purpose of why I write.
"Condemn me not for mine imperfection, neither my father, because of his inperfection, neither them who have written before him; but rather give thanks unto God that he hath made manifest unto you our imperfections, that ye may learn to be more wise than we have been." -Mormon 9:31
"For we labor diligently to write, to persuade our children, and also our brethern, to believe in Christ, and to be reconciled to God; for we know that it is by grace that we are saved, after all we can do." 2 Nephi 25:23
and 2 Nephi 25:26
"And we talk of Christ, we rejoice in Christ, we preach of Christ, we prophesy of Christ, and we write according to our prophesies, that our children may know to what source they may look for a remission of their sins."
and Alma 29:14, just a random thought I had when Evan asked me if I was happy after the break up....and it also reminds me of my Resa whenever we had successes in life I remember how happy we were for each other despite our differences...
"But I do not joy in my own success alone, but my joy is more full because of the success of my brethern. . ."