I am ready for change.
There are not very many times in my life that I can actually say that, let alone actually feel it.
Usually its a fake it until you make situation.
But I am ready for change.
I got another roommate. Change #1
I have been living alone the past 3 months. Prolly not good for me. I'll get stuck in my ways really quickly.
This one doesn't come with a boyfriend, pregnancy or dogs. Yay.
This is one is completely opposite. Never had a boyfriend, obviously virgin, definitely won't let a boy upstairs, no dogs, allergic to cats (yes I have to forfeit my opportunity for a cat in the future if not cuz of my dog right now, but her) and loves to travel. She's a flight risk. I'm okay with that.
I'm ready for a new car. Change #2
I haven't actually got one yet, but this month is my goal.
I'm going to have a new car. I love this one, we had great times and it's gotten me far in life.
But its 2001 with like 203,000 miles on it and it is slowly breaking down, enough to make the inspection process every year a somewhat pain the butt. I took it for an oil change, hopefully the last one I do for that car, and was told there is a small oil leak. I'm getting tired of hearing those little things that are breaking down. I'm not sure how much I'd be able to get from this car...
I'm ready for something new, that doesn't need constant little things fixed, for maybe a bit more safety, a habit of wearing a seatbelt, maybe some tinted windows, a black car (the only color that seems somewhat appealing to me, I'm tired of white, silver, gold and gray or any variation of color like that), some pink accents on the wheels or a pink star. I'm ready to adjust to something different.
Its been two years since I got my lasik and my house, its time for another spendy investment that will save me money in the long run.
After this spendy investment I'll have another savings goal to get to England one day. Yes, back to that goal. One thing at a time! One day I will cross the ocean though. I want to see if Dad wants to go back to England and see his old mission. I'll have to wait until he retires or is released as Bishop, but thats okay I need some time to save the money. Yay for goals and changes!
And I'm almost ready to let my dog go. Almost. Change #3
Like my issue with my car, I have a hard time jusitfying its death. Nothing really huge or major has happened to justify the termination is more beneficial than the remedy efforts. Its just the small, little things that you wonder about until you just get used to it, waiting for a bigger problem to come along. That waiting could take months or years.
So that change is the hardest and will prolly take a little while longer to figure out.
But I just wanted this moment written down in history because I, having come from a long line of "resistant changers", am now stating that I am ready for change! This might be the one and only time I actually want it, brave enough to do it, and feel that its right.
I might even re-arrange my bedroom!