haha.. wow really this isnt worth an entry, but really, to me, it is!! LOL Well Ill get straight to the point.. this right here is my 100th entry in this diary!! haha WOW I hit the triple digits now. Its kinda sad though because I managed to write 100 entires about my problems all in a few months.. thats sad.. i am full of problems!! OH WELL!! Ill live :p But yes.. I just wanted to point out that this was my 100th entry!! hehe it is exciting to me.. but I am slow and easily distracted so just about anything could be exciting to me! hhahaha

OMFG I am annoyed to no end with loy here. Because -i am serious- i only like him as a friend. I mean sure we had a lot in common and i enjoyed talking to him but I cant see him as my boyfriend. BUT according to Nina, he has been acting crazy ever since he talked to me. hes been acting "love struck" so she says. I didnt beleive her I thought she was just messing with me ya know? SHE WASNT this is how I know.. He called me before he left for work right.. and he keeps bringing up how he wants to come take me somewhere and shit like that. I keep telling him after school I dont have time to because I am just too busy and on the weekends -it depends- and no he didnt mean on a date.. i hope because thats not how i saw it. So he said well can I call you later.. and I said sure just dont call after 9pm. Guess what time he friggin called me? he called me at 1145pm! WTF? i said DONT call me AFTER 9.. 1145 is AFTER 9! He called my cell phone 5 times and then called my house phone like 10 times. I didnt answer none of the calls though.. thats why he kept calling. And my mom was screaming at me too. HE GOT ME IN FRIGGIN TROUBLE! I told him not to call me after 9 for a reason.. because I would get in trouble if my mom woke up because an idiot decided to call me so late. Then the next day I go to Nina and I am like "Why the hell was your brother thinking calling me after 9? and for so many times. you think the first.. second.. third.. and fourth time i didnt answer i wasnt going to answer 7 phone calls later" and she said "when he got home he was like 'i miss jade.. i wanna call her' and i told that little bitch not to because she cant take calls after 9, then he told me that he really misses you and didnt care" He got me in soo much trouble.. I had plans this weekend, but because of his stupid ass i cant do em now. I was p/oed that day like crazy. He is obsessed and needs to get a life and a girl HIS AGE! damn.. he is just annoying me to no end because he jst doesnt call 2x's a day.. he be calling like 20 times a day if I dont answer.. and if I do then he'll be calling me MORE!! I havent been ansering the phone when i see his number.. i mean he seems like a nice person and all but I dont really know him that well.. and from the looks of it I DONT REALLY WANT TO because he is just too clingy.. i feel smothered by him always calling and COMING BY PULASKI EVERY FRIGGIN DAY TO "SEE ME" shoot.. i see him and HIDE LMFAO!! Because he knows where I live.. he saw me walk to my house one day.. so he is all over my house ringing the door bell and shit for like 20 minutes.. I NEVER ANSWER because he just comes by unexpectedly and expects me to be available. shoot.. screw that I told him I am busy! rawr.. he is just kinda getting on my nerves and then not only having to deal with him I have to deal with all this other crap at school with peoples, and problems of my own that stay at home and in my head * no one knows my home life.. they think they know because they seen me at my house like once.. w.e but trust me no one knows.. only my best friend in the entire world who knows me like the back of my hand. Not the back of hers.. the back of mine lol. well yeas.. i just needed to really vent on this because its been driving me crazy and my girls at school dont understand so they are no help!! lol.

hhaha.. all you guys think that I want to go out with Loy! LOL.. NO. his sister -my friend- wants me to go with him, but I just like him as a friend!

I just talked to Loy for the first time. Well, Nina she really thinks me and her brother loy would make a good couple, but I have never spoken with him or seen him or anything. So today she called me and says "Guess who wants to talk to you?" .. I had a pretty good guess lol. and it was right - loy. We talked forever! lets see..he called at around 430, and we hung up at around 1135~!! This was our first time talking to eachother, and I thought it would be all quiet and stuff, but we really had a lot that we could talk about. We have a lot in common, and me and him have the same opinion with a lot of things -relationship wise- and yesh. It was just fun to talk to him. He goes to MSA though, and not Pulaski, but he said that he is gonna come by Pulaski to come hang with me after school! :) haha. I really enjoyed talking to him. Hes real nice.

I thought that things can be normal with one person, and akward with another but i got it backwards.. [you might be confuzzled if you didnt read [o.oOits a start]] I thought with.. ..Mike that maybe I could pretend like I didnt hear what he said or misheard or something.. and just pretend that things were just fine. Pretending is harder than I thought it was lmfao.. I thought... Things with Earl would be akward, but its not -suprise suprise- but everytime I talk to him [usually in the halls when we walk to class] and when we say bye he always says "I would give you a hug, but you know we're not dating no more..." he always says that.. i just kinda laugh when he says that, cuz i dono what to say to that..but "ok". Onto Other matters... Well Arnesto came and sat by me at lunch today again. Joe brought his guitar and was jammin aucustic style, and Arnesto [he plays hard rock] came over and started jammin out too! it was awsomeness. Then they started singing a song they both wrote. And arensto said "heres a song i wrote for you" [he was talking to Joe lol] and it was a love song.. LMFAO they are gay like that.. but they arent really gay.. they just are stupid lmfao. Then joe started chuckin Muffins at people LMFAO@ it was soo much fun they are figgin hilarous. Then Arnesto stated talking to me :p haha.

aha.. omg today was a good start for me to be moving on from the one i cant have.. Well this morning my buddy Mike.. hes real cool, and funny but i like him only as a friend.. tells me he is jelous. and I ask why? and he says "because i like you and your heart is with someone else" [I tell him all my guy problems cuz we close like that lol] and I dono how I am gonna go to school tommarrow actin like nothing happened right there.. he just told me he likes me.. I dono what to say that!! Hes gonna be 17 too, and I dont think I could go with a 17 year old when I am only almost 15. Then my girl Nina wants me to go out with her brother loy really badly, and i guess he likes me, I am not sure. But he is real nice too! [see my diarie dieinginside for his pic.] Then people keep coming up to me telling me that Earl wants to get back with me. Me and him still talk to, we are still friends, and he hasnt said anything so I am just not gonna bring it up because I will say no!! lol.. not going back there, but I will be his friend, he is nice :) Then Eduardo keeps callin me his girlfriend and askin me out, and i keep saying nO!! because of what happened with him and Manal.. thats something that will make me say no, because i worry he might make me do the same -and he is strong he could literally make me if he wanted to. Then today at lunch I was talking with Joeseph [hes my upperclassmen buddy..hes HILARIOUS] and we were shooting pickles and stuff like that at his friends, and I didnt even know them lmfao. But then his friends come over and we all started talking about just stupid crap. and at this point Jessica, Nicole, and Sarai left the table lmfao so its me and all these guys. And we were just acting stupid. And this guy Arnesto, he intorduces himself to me [forgetting that we've actually already met lmfao] and Joe he ggoes to Arnesto and says "I am speaking for jade. I have a penis" lmfao and Arnesto goes "do you realy?" and I say no.. of course and he goes "oh ok becaue then i was gonna say you are one hot dude" and then he asks me out!! :D haha. Then people were coming up to me saying "you go with Nathanal" and I say NOOOOOOOOOOO cuz eww NO gross.. and they say he is tellin people that we go together! NOOOOOOOOOOOO GROOSSSS EWWW NOOO At the end of the day nina and nicole say to me dang jade everybody up in this school likes you, and i dont mean as a friend [ I had told them about all this that happend. cuz they my girls, and i cant talk to mike about it now cuz it would be kinda weird now lol.

This would happen to me...figures This just baffles me, because you know what this would happen to me. I would do something thinking that it was the right thing to do, and at the time it felt right ...but... then you find out it wasnt the right thing to do at all. and now I am finding regrets. [I dont know why over and over again I find myself trying to open up to someone I think I can let it. But you think I would learn that the more you open up to someone that you thought you could trust..dont..because it just gives them more information to hurt you with]

okay. so. i am kinda... freaking out right now. not really soo much because nothing really bad happend. well something bad happend, but its not as bad as it could have been. and right now i dont know what to do with myself.. i am just.. ahh. i cant sleep coz some how i am just not tired anymore, even tho i was woken up to hear this news. and rah. for a second i felt like i couldnt breath, and my world slowly collapsed around me.

so i haven't been here in basically ages. so much has changed in my life. srsly. i was readin some of my old entries, and ew. LMFOA. well heres an update: School = rwr NOT PULASKI. Job = Kopps Boyfriend = Zaj yah, pulaski was lame. so i left it. long story. haha. well. hrm. i shall be back to write again! :] kthnx. bye

i dont get this, at all. why is it when i am finally happy and with someone everyone wants to tell me how they like me? i just dont get it sometimes. i mean, guys that i used to like a lot are just now telling me how they feel about me. [double you tee eff] when im lonley no one wants me, but when im not lonely everyone wants me. well thats how it seems. well heres the thing. this boy that i was strung up over last year, but i got over, started talkin to me again. now hes all like "i like you and blah blah". but hes just too late now, and hes not getting it. i have a boyfriend now, that i happen to love very much and i wouldnt let anything get inbetween us. he tells me we would be together forever, and i believe him when he says it. im finally happy, and this guy thinks he can come in and mess that up? and its not just him. its alot of my guy friends. well i thought they were friends.. if they really were "my friends" they would just be happy for me right? and not say that "i need to be wiht them or they wont talk to me anymore" or that "i would be happier with them" and all this. some of my best friends im loosing. i hate this. I always said that i would put my friends before my boyfriend, coz "friends are forever" but they.. they just arent coming first now. they put me in a situation that i didnt want to be in, and they shouldnt have done that. all i want is my friends back, but i dont think they are ever coming back because i have a boyfriend now, and its not them. they were too little too late. theyre tellnig me things now that i wanted to hear a year ago. i moved on with them as my friends. some of the bestest friends i ever had. but now they cant seem to even look at me. i lost my life when i got this new one.

wow been a while since I have been here but yeah. im sooo uber happy. if only you knew... ...i love him.

oh em eff gee.. my last entry wasnt exactly short huh? lol. Ill try to keep this one much shorter haha. Well yesterday I played baseball with the guys at the park. Not enough people showed because they were at state fair but we did a home run derby. I said I would try but I doubt that i would hit a home run..i was hitting homeruns earlier when my step dad was teaching me how to bat, but i never practiced with fast balls. but i hit the ball many times which I was proud about, and they werent foul! hehe !! but i waas so hyper, and I was chasing Nathan for like 50 billion hours because he threw rocks at me and hit me in the face with my soda bottle lmfao. and i was so tired from running earlier I could barley chase him lmafao.. i finally got him back like 2 hours later or some crap lfmao it was just crazy .. then me lisa and amanda just randomly drop kicked the fence, and i was randomly doing ollies out of know where, and eating joeys funyun rings because he drank my lemonade lmfao. and effin stole my ball that dip face. lol. anyways. yea thats all for now folks! =P

Oh wow, its been a while since i have written in this diary lol. well well well.. hrmm.. to answer katies question [in the comments] i dont use a program really.. i just type out my codes in notepad then paste it into geocities, and TADA! LOL yeah.. nothign special really.. for andrea [check the comments].. my friends list is hidden HAHA..u have to click the friends link at the top of the page.. well nothing really to say here.. just in Madison at the college program most of you know of.. yesh...well hrmm? i should really go...my guys are performing at the talent show tonight. they are doing Teen Spirit by Nirvana..they are gonna rock the house.. they play guitar and drums..awsume huh? well tk*

New diary here! the name is fallenelement ((its on my friends list)) and sorry if i didnt add you to my friends list yet on my new diary.. youll get on there eventually LOL..just leave a comment if i didnt add you and Ill add you then kay? It just gets so confuzzling when you forget who you have already added, and who you need to add!! haha and I have a new website too.. even though I love all my ajadeoriginal stuff.. i needed a change so check out my new website Happydots.tk

When my world turns upside down walking on the ceiling no where else to go kind of crazyness I realize that I am just a Fallen Element ahah.. dont ask what thats about.. just something that poped in to my head.. randomly just pulled it out my pocket. i know it dont make much sense lol.

I had a good weekend.. Friday.. Jessica, Justin, Lisa, and I went to the movies.. we say the Longest Yard.. It was funny!! Me lisa and Jessica were just hangin at my house before the movie and me and lisa needed to see if Darren could come over tommarrow. so we call his cell and he doenst answer.. and he always answers.. so lisa just screams "you friggin crack whore" and hangs up lol.. then there are like 15 more messages like that from her lol.. then the last message we left she said the same thing, then Jessica (who never met or talked to darren before) says to his answering machine "biatch" lmfao it was funny. then after the movie they come back to my house and after everyone leaves i get a call from darren.. and its like 1030 right now.. and we were talking and out of no where he walks past my house with is cousins.. and he doesnt see me sitting outside but i can see him.. and i dont say nuttin and he said "is that you on the computer" and i say "no freak i am the one sittin on the porch lookin at you" lmfao.. It was funny. had to be there. Saterday.. I had to babysit *unfortunatley* so Lisa brings all the guys from the park to me! lmfao So I am skateboardin and just chillin outstide of my house while i babysit. That was fun. But cuz of Ricci, Darren taught the little kids next door some new words that they shouldnt be sayin lol. Then when Darren was about to leave *he had to get his girlfriend i think* he was like can i get hug.. so he grabs me and tries to put me in his trunk lmfao.. he said i have to come live down there so hes kidnappin me so i can come down to the school more often lol. Sunday.. I talked to Darren on the phone and he said I should come up to the park.. but i couldnt cuz my mom didnt want me to walk there.. she didnt want me to take the bus there.. and she didnt want him to pick me up.. and she didnt want to drive me. So unless I could fly..there was no way i was gettin up to the school there. lol.. so we just talked on the phone. Then Lisa came over and we were up all night it was crazyness. Then at around 11pm Darren calls me up and says that i HAVE to come to the park tommarrow at noon..so i was like ok.. and i didnt tel him but i guess he knew lisa was there. then he said "oh and you girls dont be shy with the video camera" i was like WTF? howd he know she was here lmfao.. so me and lisa video taped up just doing something stupid with my dog just for him lmfao. hten i told him id call him back in like 5 minutes and i never called him back lfmao..bad me.. but w.e Monday... then today me and lisa were playin sims 2 and he ma said shes coming to get her at 130. So we get all ready and are waitin for her ma. its 230 and we finally got ahold of her and her mom says "sorry forgot" lfmao. SO i leave with her to her house and i go to the park. Then I call Darren up cuz he all wanted me to come and hes not even friggin there lmfao. it was just Cool Mike, Basbeball Mike, Fat Darren, EJ, Eddie, Zeus, Zeus's brother, Ricci, Cool Ricky, Lisa, Carlee, Jimmy, Nate, Kyle, Keith, ho brittany (but she came nad left right away), the twins, and this one grl who i forgot her name so i call her liza lol... well we were all there waiting for Darren to come. SO i called him up and he says that hes in beliot and hes on his way now. He pulls up with his Girlfriend in the car and her three little kids. and everyone was lookin like..crap shes here lmfao. She was grouchy as ever today. cuz she doesnt like me or lisa cuz we are Darrens "park girlfriends" or something like that. But we are just good friends with him.. and she doesnt like that. So she was crabby than ever. Plus she doesnt like any of his friends, but she doesnt like us more cuz we are girls.. so it was interesting cuz i wasnt gonna stop bein me and just goofin off with everyone cuz shes there. but Darren kept coming by me and she was givin me the dirtiest looks lmfao. I asked him how come hes not by his girlfriend and he said "shes yellin at me about everything like its my fault. I dont want to be around her when shes yellin at me.." haha and she seriously was yellin at him about EVERYTHING. like shes mad at him because he doesnt own an automatic car for her. and how she spent like 700 dollars on some new clothes on her crdit card and now has a big bill. now how is that his fault? I dono.. but he was just talkin to me about all that, and it was just ridiculous how bojus she is to him.. and she was just givin me looks. I was sittin on my rock (lol yesh i have a rock) and then darren came and sat on the rock right by mine and she muttered something and came over and just like pushed her way in like some how its my fault he sat by me. so yeah.. she doenst like me lol.. but me and him are just good friends.. thats all. but anyways.. Darren finally showed up and he came over by me and lisa and ricci and out of no where his gf just started to snap about i dont even know what.. and darren was even like "wth is she snappin about?" then he left and went over to play baseball. and i went over by nate, mike, keith and jimmy.. i didnt know jimmy yet though.. i wanted to meet him thats why i went over lol. and they aked me how old i was and i was about to tell them, and Darren was like"i am going to be pissed if you tell them.. it took like 6 weeks for you finally tell me" so i didnt tell them lol, i had them guess.. they were saying "ur 17 right?" and i was just laughin. and then Darren was like "shes 19 and in the 9th grade" and jimmy and nate are like "really" lol and Mike, ive known him since i was 4 is just sittin there laughin about how far off htey were lol. that was funny right there. Then kyle came out of no where and just sat down and it looked like he was sleeping so cool darren (not Darren, COOL DARREN.. there are 2 darrens lol) whiped a tennis ball at his face! kyle just shakes his head and does nothing. Then keith comes out of no where with his salad and pushes me and i pushed him back and then he said out of no where "how old are you" lol and lisa says "shes 17 and shes in the 9th grade" and keith like spits out his salad and thinks she serious lol. and out of know where he says "i bet you dont know how old i am" and i said, "i know how old you are".. hes 20, and he thought i didnt know. lol. then i got that right , so he was askin me for lisas age and stuff, and i got that right, then he asked me for Darrens age and bday and i got that right and they just stop and look at me and say "stalker" lol.. cuz they have known darren for a longer time than me, and they didnt even know his birthday and i did lol. I was rollin.. its one of those you had to be there kidn of things. well a whole lot more things happend at hte park today.. just cant type out all of it.. but htey all noticed my hair cut *oh yesh* and Zeus said it was tight. lol. well yeah.. that was my fun weekend there.. well parts of it at least.. so much happens at the park that I dont have enough time or patience to tell you guys about it lol.

FYI::Motorola v170 Well here I am once again alone. I always find myself alone at home. Everyone that I live with seem to not have time for me anymore. They come home late, they leave to do things without me, and every once in a while I will get a day with them. I dont mind being alone or anything, but my mom doesnt even let me go out with friends whild shes gone usually so then I am stuck bored. She doesnt like me hanging out at places thats not familiar to her...so.. i am bored stiff.. stuck here... yay... but shes not here so I leave anyways. She never knows anyways. BTW emily, Chicken boy -remember him?- works at walmart on 72nd. hes the cart boy lol

ok all you guys who remember me with long hair are gonna hate me for this cuz i said i was gonna grow it back out.. but i dont care!! lol.. MY SPIKES ARE BACK!!! heck yes they are.. I went to Michelle today and she cutmy hair and I decided to change it up again.. and i got my spikes back. oh yes I LOVE MY SPIKES!! and the fact that i dont look like everyone else is a plus.. i was never one for blending in with the crowd.. unless the crowd is full of people who look...well.. like freaks. then ill fit right in lmfao. well i am not so freaky lookin.. i am weird looking but not.. inbetween lol. well i gotta go..lisa is bring all the guys from the park to my friggin house! I dont know why.. but i have to find a way to keep them out cuz guys in the house with my parents gone while babysittin.. NOT THE BEST IDEA. lfmao.. im still a good girl at heart < 3

I can't believe it but I leave in 23 days for 3 weeks and i will be all by mylself with strangers in a different part of the state unfamiliar to me. freaking out? .. urm.. maybe lol. I want to go no doubt about that. This is the best opportunity ever for my future, but for three weeks all I will have is myself, and phone calls to my friends. which btw is free for me if you call my dorm room :p just an fyi I am gonna miss my friends. but it is only 3 weeks, and im sure that they will fly by.. right? but for three weeks i wont be able to go skate boarding with lisa, and darren, and ricci, and zeus and all those other peoples. but I talk to them like every day on the phone, and i am sure that that wont change during those three weeks. but i am just nervous.. i dono why because i am super independent, and i am used to being, and doing things by myself. but still.. living by myself on STATE street.. the street where i can get into a lot of trouble on. this is just crazyness.. oh and 19 days until i am 15

ok now i remember why i stopped skateboarding. I kept hurting myself doing it! lol Oh well.. a little scratch never stopped me :p. .. but i like twisted my ankle and i got bruises on my legs and arms and crap. somehow I got more banged up than darren, and he unsuccessfuly ollied down a flight of steps. I didnt do anything crazy like that.. shoot.. im not that crazy lol. Yesterday my ankle was worse than today.. but it seems to be feeling better.. but my legs still hurt..they are sore and it feels like i pulled a muscle or something? ya know that feeling? well i dono well got to go.. school starts soon and I dont think hookie is the thing to do today lol.