I’ve been thinking about you lately

7028078650

Sounds good. Talk to you later.

yes you need sleep text me when your available tomorrow

Truth. Ok well Im going to head to bed. Ive gotta stop getting 3 hours of sleep and trying to function. Any chance we can actually talk on the phone soon? Ill lay off the calling and texting, I know you have youre own life to attend to instead of fucking up something talking to me. Just want to talk to you here at some point.

thats a part of growing up though your not learning unless your making mistakes

Well hopefully it all gets back on track as soon as possible. That shit sucks. Trust me, there is nothing worse than worrying about as something as dumb as money all the damn time.

It really is me though, Ive always made dumbass choices in my life. Ive just gotta move on and try to learn from my mistakes.

getting there he took out two loans which he should have so it will take a bit to get back on track..its not you just didn't have the right girl

There is nothing interesting about me...Its the worst profession for a relationship and I never really took that as a factor. I'm just dealing with the repercussions of it now. That's rough, financial strain can really take a toll. At least everything is back to normal right?

relatively normal…he was out of work for about a month or so that put a strain on finances..im not as interesting as you are

Yep and I was just too much of a bitch to admit it and do this. Anyway, enough of my shit, Ill be fine and get through it. How goes everything with you? Hows your life going? Everything good with the job and the bf?

that sucks kev. you were way too good to her :(((

We argued about essentially everything for the past three years...it really kicked off two months ago when I told her I talked to you. I realized she held everything in our marriage over my head...I work about 14 hours a day and to come home to a dirty house, no dinner made and a wife that does nothing but spend my money really sucks. I tried to help her get a job, I wrote an awesome resume for her, helped her find places to work, did all of her school applications to get her back in..mind you I did most of this in my free time in afg..To just come home to that every day...there is only so many times you can kick the dog before it bites you..thats the short story.

How I feel: Gary Allan - Every Storm (runs out of rain)

thats crazy though so how did it end between you and her

back.

smoking brb

Yea, sadly. Basically I pay for everything and everything is in my name, so if we go uncontested it should be fine and ill just keep paying the ridiculous shit I already pay for..if it goes contested, the legal fees are going to essentially fuck me...I feel ok about it though since I make more than both her parent combined..if it comes to money I can cowboy up more than she could even without getting my parent or family involved.

wow so you need to play nice with her

Yea thats what my lawyer told me..but its up to us to essentially mediate between the two of us on who gets what..if it goes to a contested case its going to cost me everything Ive worked for.

so how did it end?

y'all were only together a little why that has to mean something

so even though she chose not to have a job its on you thats retarded

basically Georgia is a Need vs Capability state...so since she hasnt had a job in 3 years she hasnt had the capability to pay for anything...even though it was her choice..so I get fucked on the financial end.

i dont understand how all that works

wow! she can't do that! she's crazy how I'm dumbfounded

i keep refreshing like every couple seconds lol

Basically shes going to try and take me for everything. I already typed the long story out and it didn't save. You have time to talk tomorrow?

wait so what did you hear

Kept forgetting to log in.

Okay, sounds good. I uh got some interesting news from the ex. I might be completely fucked. How goes your relationship? Seeing as how mine is fucked.

: ): )

i can talk on here

Ah gotcha. Can you text or anything?

I'm at home with the boyfriend

Yea I was definitely still asleep..Too much booze last night, I woke up at like 11 my time. I just tried calling you, did you get it?

whyyyy..i also tried to call you this morning it was like 730am my time

I apparently dont.

I don't think you get my texts

I always forget about them and always go back to them every few months. Great band.

Yes love them

You ever listen to Mumford and Sons?

Sounds good, will do. Miss you. =]

I'll try and give you a call tomorrow text me whenever :)

Well, you have my new number so give me a call whenever you get the chance. Id really like to sit down and talk.

Yes of course.

Like on the phone. I am NOT going MIA again. Ive fixed that problem.

Or are you going mia again

Like on the phone or on here?

Like on the phone or on here?

Can we talk again at some point?

you have a love hate relationship with it and that's understandable you just need to figure out what you want most out your life

Its not easy. Again, Im sorry for how out relationship as friends has deteriorated over the years. It was never my intention and I wont put blame on anyone else, I should have fought to make sure I could at least talk with you and maintain contact.

Im weird, I get in to moods where I want to go do the badass stuff and then Im just so not motivated at times to go do it. At this point Im so disgruntled with with army I feel like I want out. But I love my country and I love the American ideal more than anything and I want to go back. I make no sense. Iknow.

Your not a retard nor are you bad..we all have our faults. Keeping in touch is never easy for anyone and never think you are the problem when you are the one reaching out ..it's them they are missing out on someone who is amazing and full of experience..fuck them and stop doubting yourself

For starters; you. Most of my friends. The only time Ive talked to 90% of the people I essentially grew up with is when I call them every few months. I literally get zero calls from my childhood friends unless I call first..There are about 2 exceptions. I know Im a fucking retard but am I that bad? Id like to think I try to do a pretty good job of making sure everyone is doing well and all that. Id call people from fucking afg and leave messages and never get a response back. This is me bitching, which Im going to completely stop. I need to focus on getting back in to shape and a better mindset. /endrant

Like who and how

I cant believe how many bridges Ive burned in the past few years.

Well if that's what you want to do then do it fuck everyone else

Thats pretty much what Ive heard since this entire clusterfuck has started. I want to: 1.) go back and do that again and come back as a captain 2.) drop my special forces packet and try for that. 3.) none of the above and just stick it out with what Im doing and get out in about 6 years.

All of which revolve around what I want to do for a change.

You need to find your happiness again...it's going to take time..you got rid of the negative in your life but you just need to settle back in not go away

I want to tell you everything...I think I started to tell you everything when we talked. I have just really been confused about my life the past few years. The only time Ive actually felt like Ive done anything worth a damn in life is saving people I dont even know or even speak their language. Id rather be there than here...at least there I have a purpose and I can do something worth while...people here dont get it..

What aren't you telling me

At this point, I'm trying to.

Are you going back to Afghanistan

I hope to rectify my past. I'm not this person.

Yes you have been a dick to me many times over but in the end I'm always here for you

I was a complete dick to you, many times over. I called it quits a few weeks ago with the wife. Ive needed my best friend to talk to and I cant find it with the people I know here, even the ones Ive gone though hell with. Ive wanted so bad to just call you and apologize. I tried to work things out and it just didnt work, thats why things happened the way they did. Its no excuse, but I am truly sorry.

Tell me what's going on why you feel that way

I dont even know what I can say at this point. Im losing it. Im sorry.

I'm here

you there?

you can text me or we can talk on here