" SuRvEy "

Listening to: RoCkShOw - bLiNk 182
Feeling: happy
TEN FIRSTS First Best Friend: DaWnE First Screen Name: DeViLz_LiL_AnGeL First Pet: Mi PuDdY tAt MiNtY First Piercing: Mi LiL eArZ First Crush: dAmOn AsHwOrTh First CD Bought: sPiCe GaLz First Car: UmM i AiNt Gt 1 First Love: aDaM jOnEz ... I fInK yEa LoL iT wAz In 5tH fOrM hEhE First Stuffed Animal: It WaZ a PiNk N wHiTe TeDdY iN pJz NINE LASTS Last Alchoholic Beverage: bOuRbOn .. nUmMiEz Last Car Ride: UmM 2 Da SuPaMaRkEt WiD mI sTeP mUm Last Movie Seen: ThE sOuTh PaRk 1 Last Phone Call: HmM iT wAz AgEz AgO cOz Me In Oz HaHa Last Song Played: aLL i WaNt 4 xMaS iZ u - MaRiAh CaReY Last Bubble Bath: a FeW wEeKz AgO! Last Time You Cried: dA oThA dAe Last time You Laughed: 2dAe Last Time You Fell: UmMmZ... EIGHT HAVE YOU EVERS Have You Ever Dated One Of Your Best Friends: No BuT cAmE cLoSe To It Have You Ever Been Arrested: NoPeZ Have You Ever Skinny Dipped: MaYbE LoL .. i WaZ dRuNk Ok LoL hEhEz It WaZ fUn ThO Have You Ever Been On TV: nOpEz Have You Ever Regreted a Kiss: iT sTaRtEd Ot WiD a KiSs HoW dId It EnD uP LiKe DiS LoL Have You Ever Lied: YeA Have You Ever Teased: iM nOt LyK dAt LoL SEVEN THINGS YOU ARE WEARING: 1. mI nEwEsT g StRiNg DaTz HoT pInK dAt SeZ sExY n It C tHrOuGh LoL 2. a WhItE gYpSy SkIrT 3. uMm a BrA 4. sAnDaLz 5. Mi BlAcK tOp 6. ..................... 7. ....................... SIX THINGS YOU'VE DONE TODAY 1. SpEnT mOnEy 2. oPeNd PrEzZiEz 3. SoLvEd An ArGuEmEnT 4. bEeN bOrEd 5. pLaYeD pS2 6. bEeN oN mSn FIVE FAVORITE THINGS IN NO ORDER 1. mUsIc 2. bEd 3. wRiTiNg PoEmZ 4. mI dIaRy 5. ...... FOUR PEOPLE YOU CAN TELL ANYTHING TO 1. aLeX kInG 2. NaThAn 3. mI dIaRy LoL 4. Mi BrUdDa THREE CHOICES 1. Hot or Cold: hOt 2. Black or White: bLaCk 3. Chocolate or Vanilla: cHoKoLaTe TWO THINGS YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE: 1. sEe EmInEm LiVe In CoNcErT 2. bUnGy JuMp ONE THING YOU REGRET 1. BeIn A bItCh 2 jOrDaN n AsH
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-> iM sIk Ov Mi LyF <-

Feeling: angry
haz a guy eva sed he luvd u?? bt then he cheats on u haz a guy eva sed he misses u?? n den da nex nite hez havin sex wid sum1 else haz a guy eva sed he'd neva break up wid u?? bt he did haz a guy eva sed he'd neva lie 2 u?? bt did 4 bout 4 monthz neway dese r da questionz in mi head rite now and u mite ask y bt here il tell u!! wen we wer goin out paul sed he luvd me .. then he cheated on me! last nite paul sed he missed me .. 2nite hez having sex with SARAH !! wen we wer goin out paul sed he wud neva break up wid me?? .. he did oh n he also sed he neva lied 2 me .. he did / he sed he neva cheated on me im soooo angry rite now i duno wat 2 do or say .. i mean im in oz n hez in nz yea i dnt care bout dat but i didnt fink he waz dat desperate, n here i am wunderin y he not online!! i mean itz not like we go out.. i mean we can do wateva we want but then why am i sooo hurt coz ov this, n anudda question !!!!!!!!!! WHY DO GUYZ ALWAYZ FUK ME AROUND ?? oh n wud he have dun this if we wer still goin out!! i dont kno bt i kno im not okay !!!!!!!!!!!!
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* h8iN jOrDz *GrRr* !! *

Feeling: angry
[ wat hapend wud me n jordz from da beginin to da end ] me n jordz gt reali close at 1 point n wel he waz lyk mi best friend i cud tel him nefing n he wud neva judge me n wel he'd help me wid mi bf problemz n id help him wid problemz wid ash wen he had dem n den wen me n mi x broke up wel i realised der waz sumin bwt him i cudnt put mi finga on so i decided 2 go c him n wel it wnt pwetty wel i gave him a hug n we wer so happy den he w8ed wid me at da bus styop til i had 2 go home n i realised i actualli lyk him i saw him da nex 2 weekendz n we gt reali close, den on guy fawkes nite i waz at matt ellises party n waz fully wasted off mi face n wanted 2 hook up wid jordz n he sed no coz i waz drunk neway da nex mornin i waz sober n woke up at sum randomz house lol oopz neway i found mi way 2 da dairy wer i met up wid mi m8 daniel n i made him walk wid me 2 jordz place.. so he did n wel jordz waz asleep n we kinda woke him up oopz n umm he den let me in hiz house n he waz da only 1 der he den sed u cn hop in if ya want so i hoped in his bed n 10 minz l8a he fell asleep so i juss watched him n den datz wen i 4t i luvd him so i waz in fairyland lyk usual wel jus considerin i waz in da same bed az him n wen he woke up we talked n sumhow managed 2 fuk .. oopz wel neway he sed i cud tel 2 ov mi m8z coz dey wudnt tel ash'z sista so i did only coz he sed i cud den lyk 2 dayz l8a practically the whole of taita new n i waz angry bt noo jordz sed it waznt him so datz wen it al started it waz al mi fault den even tho he sed i cud tel dem *grr* i gt soo angry n upset i gt cald everyfing frm slappa 2 slut n i didnt kno wat 2 do den sumhow ash found out n wel i fink da whole world knew bt no1 wanted 2 hear mi side ov da story coz ima chik n wel chikz get cald everyfing neway she den started 2 slowly dis like me n wanted jordz even mre me n jordz den started havin big arguementz n we started driftin apart neway da otha day i waz talkin 2 todd thinkin itz weird dat dey luv echotha n dey dnt go ot n he musta told jordz coz he went ape sht at me n we argued 4 agez n den he goez dnt talk bwt me n mi ashy lyk dat an im lyk wateva n hez lyk i fukn luv her n im lyk if u luvd her u wudnt hav fukd me n he goz i cared 4 u wata mistake dat waz obviously n so i gt upset n den he goz fuken bitch den blokd me ..
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* rAmDoMneZz *

Feeling: thankful
WaT dO u Do WeN tHe OnE u LoVe Iz WiTh SuMbOdY eLsE b ThErZ nUfFiN u CaN dO aBoUt It, hOw Do U cOpE.....?? nO mAtTa WaT hApPeNz BeTwEeN uS iL aLwAyZ hAvE a LoVe FoR u, EvEn ThO rItE nOw U cUdNt CaRe LeSs I jUs WaNt U tO kNo DaT u MaDe Me HaPpY n EvErYtHiNg BuT dOnT wOrRy ItZ gOn NoW iL bE sItTiN iN bEd CrYiN mIsElF tO sLeEp As UsUaL.. iM nOt O fUkEn K
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* mI fAuLt AgEnZ *

Feeling: torn
i DuNnO wAt 2 sAt.. SoWi BoUt Mi LaSt EnTrY iT kInDa StUfFeD uP n YeA! i NoT sUrE wAt To Do NoW, JoRdZ hAtEz Me N wUdNt LeT mE eXpLaIn NeFiNg BoUt WaT wE wEr ArGuIn BoUt, mI bEsT m8 nAtHaN iZ mOvIn AwAy N iM pWeTtY sUrE dAt pAuLz AnGrY aT mE 2.. i gUeSs ItZ mOsTlY mI fAuLt FoR sAyIn dAt I sHuD jUs Go N i WnT OfFlInE dEn I cAmE bAk N hE wAz GoNe So I dUnOz.. iM vErY sLeEeEePiZ tO i HaVnT hAd MuCh SlEeP aT aLL.. WeL yEa I dUnO wAt 2 wRiTe So iL tAlK mOrE wEn Im In A bEtTa MoOd K cOz YeA iM hAvIn A bAd DaE xOxOxOxOxOx
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* wErZ mI bUbBy *

I nEeD pAuL nOw I mIsS hIm HeEpZ.. i WiSh I cUd JuS gIv HiM 1 cUdDlE bUt CaNt CoZ iM iN oZ aN sTiL gOt AnUtHa 42 DaYz To Go So Me GoTa WaIt TiL dEn!! iTz Ok OvA hErE tHo JuS hEePzA ArGuEmEnTz.. i DuNo WaT tO sAy THo, i SpENt SoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo MuCh MoNeY tHo OmG lOl I cAnT bElIvE iT. WeL iMa DyE mI hAiR 2MoWoZ, n OmG i BoUgHt pAuL n Mi BrUdDa DeR pReZzIeZ 2dAe I hOpEz DeY lYk DeM!!! WaT dO u Do WeN u KnO u LoVe HiM aN hE lOvEz U bUt U cAnT bE tOgEtHa BeCoZ uR aFrAiD tHaT iT wIl Al Go RoNg AgEn??? iN oThA wOrDz I wAnA gO bAk OuT wId PaUl.. We WeNt Ot 4 lYk 7 An A hAlF mOnThZ bUt Hu KnOwZ.. iTz WeiRd He FiNx Im PrEgNaNt LoL, n He CaLLiN mE a MiLf N eVeRyFiNg N aSkIn HoW oUr "BuBbA" iZ lOl I mEaN i DnT eVeN nO yEt, Me N pAuL r StIl BeSt MaTeZ tHo 4 sUrE lOl wEl YeA i BeTa Go B4 I cRy CoZ i LoVe HiM sOoO MuCh An CaNt C hIm 4 aNuDdA 42 dAyZ sO yEa DaTz BoWt It LoL ... CyAz XoXoX
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* 2 mI tRaCeY bUmZ *

Listening to: sUmDaY - tHiRsTy MeRc
aWwWwW fAnX u Mi HuNnIe I kNo U wOnT bReAk Mi HeArT aN iL nEvA bReAk UrZ, I mEmBa DaT pWoMiZ tO mI bAyBeA gUrL. nEwAyZ fAnKiN u SoOoO mUcH.. oMg BuB i GeTtIn Mi TaTtOo SoOnIeZ iM sOoOo ScArEd LoL.. Mi DaD gOz To Me DoNt WoRrY iT dOnT hUrT sO uR gOt NuFfIn To WoRrY bOuT.. yEa RiTe EaSy 4 HiM tO sAy LoL hEz GoT tHoUsAnDz Of TaTtOoZ eVeRyWeR!! hAhA.. DnT wOrRy ThO k SwEeTiE i WaZ hAvIn A pAuL mOmEnT LaSt NiTe i MiSs HiM hEaPz I dsErIoUsLy FiNk DaT hE wAz Mi FiRsT tRuE LoVe N iL aLwAyZ rEmEmBa HiM!! WeL yEa Im OfF k Mi BuB jUs MeMbA i LoVe u LoNgTyM 4EvAz MwAh!*
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* r U sErIoUs *

Feeling: heartbroken
Im SeRiOuSlY bReAkIn DoWn I cAnT tAkE iT nE mOrE i MiSs Mi BaYbEa I nEeD pAuL i CaNt BeLiEvE dAt Im CrYiN, iM gEtTiN sOoOo EmOtIoNaL aGeN.. i MiSs HiM sO bAd, ThE wAy He LiGhTlY kIsSeZ mE aN dA wAy He HuGz Me!! i MiSs It SoOoOoOo MuCh I wAnT tO bE iN hIz ArMz WeRe I bElOnG, y DiD tHiNgZ gO wRoNg BeTwEeN uS i LoVe HiM sO mUcH iM gOiN iNsAnE.. iVe GoT aBoUt 40 mOrE dAyZ TiL i CaN c HiM, I jUs WaNa HeAr ThE sOuNd Of HiZ vOiCe, NeFiNg ToO KeEp Me CaLm... i LoVe U bUmBuMz N i WiL 4EvA, LoTz Ov LoVe Ur LiL sWeEtI bUmZ x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x
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* MoRe Nu QuOtEz *

Feeling: bruised
Your Not Worth My Tears Your Not Worth The Heartache. I Don't Know Why I Give You The Time. Your Not Woth The Pain Your Not Worth The Emptiness I Don't Know Why But I Wish You Were Mine Lately I've been remembering all the good times we had together, u have no idea how much that scares me, becuase I know if I forget all the bad times, the time u broke my heart, all the nights u made me cry, I'll fall in love with u all over again, and I know my heart can't take that. Forget the times he walked by, forget the times he made you cry, forget the times he spoke your name, remember your feelings aren't the same, forget the times he held your hand, forget the sweet things if you can, forget those times and don't pretend, remember now he's just a friend .•Good Night Lil Star.. Maybe My Wish Will Come True.. Sleep Tight Lil Star.. I'll Be Dreaming Along With You.. And If Tomorrow I Wake Up N He's Still Just My Friend, Then I'll See You Tomorrow Night Lil Star N Wish On You Again•.
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* HeAvEn... 9/11 *

Listening to: mE sInGiN hEhEz
Feeling: high
CaN u MeMbAz DaT sOnG ... Da HeAvEn 1 wId Da LiL gUrL hU lOsT hEr DaD fRoM 9/11 WeL iF u WaNa C aN anImAtIoN oF tHe ViDeO cLiP cLiK oN dA lInK bElOw ..... http://www.flashplayer.com/animation/imissyoudaddy_movie.php ItZ sO sAd BuT sOoOo KeWl It A cArToOn VeRsIoN wEl YeA i JuS lUv DaT sOnG sO yEa I jUs FouGhT iD pUt It On HeRe!!!!!!!
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* pAuLz SoNg To Me*

Feeling: smooth
"More Than Words" [Verse 1] Saying I love you Is not the words I want to hear from you Its not that I want you not to say But if you only knew How easy it would be to show me how you feel More than words Is all you have to do to make it real Then you wouldn't have to say that you love me, yeah Cause I'd already know. [Verse 2] What would you do (what would you do) If my heart was torn in two? More than words to show you feel That your love for me is real What would you say If I took those words away Then you couldn't make things new Just by saying I Love You (just saying I love you, saying I love you) More than words (just saying I love you, saying I love you) [Verse 3] Now that I've tried to (now that I've tried to) Talk to you and make you understand All you have to do is Close your eyes and just reach out your hand And touch me Hold me close don't ever let me go More than words Is all I ever needed you to show Then you wouldn't have to say That you love me, yeah Cause I'd already know (just saying I love you, saying I love you) More than words [repeat till fade]
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* EmO *

Feeling: tense
wHy Am I sOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo EmOtIoNaL 2dAe, fIrSt I gEt AnGrY bOuT lEaViN cOuRsE aT 4.15 InStEd Ov 4 aN i FiNaLy GoT 2 Da StAtIoN aT 4.55 n I nOrMaLi GoTa B hOmE bY 5.30 EvErYnItE n DeN i GoT fUkD oFf CoZ dA bUs WaZ mEaNt 2 cOmE aT 5.11 aN iT tAkEz 40 MiNz To GeT hOmE sO i WuDa BeEn LaTe DeN, sTeViE pUlLeD uP n DrOvE mE tO pAuLz N i StArTeD cRyIn An WaZ tRyNa TaLk Ta HiM bUt He KePt ChAnGiN dA sUbJeCt LyK i WaZnT eVeN dEr, aN i SeD i NeEdEd A cUdDlEz N hEZ lYk WeL cN u WaiT n Im LYk YeA k WaTeVa He DeN sTaRtEd TaLkIn BoUt WoRk N dIdNt EvEn NoTiCe DaT i HaD bEeN cRyIn y He KePt TaLkIn.. So ThEn I gOt ShItTy N sTaRtEd WaLkIn HoMe An He ToLd Me OfF aN gOz Y cAnT u JuS wAiT 2 MiNz WaT d FuK i NeEdEd To B hOmE iN 10 nEwAy I tHeN gOt HoMe An We HaD mInCe.. eWw I hAtE mInCe An DeN i GoT oN MsN n EvErY1 KePt AsKiN wAt WaZ rOnG!! mI aUnTy DeN tOlD mE oFf WeN sHe GoT hOmE bEcOz I lEfT mI mEdIcInE aT cOuRsE sO i SlAmMd dA dOoR, aN aT bOuT 9.30iSh i TxTeD pAuL sEeIn If He CuD bUrN mE a Cd An He GoEz U cUdA tOlD mE eArLiEr N iM lYk I dId N hE gOeZ wEn N iM lyK wEn I wAz At UrZ bUt U dIdNt NoTiCe Me TaLkIn CoZ i WaZ pRaCtIcAlI iNvIsIbLe He DiDnT tXt BaK sO i GoT pArAnOyEd An DeN i CrIeD fOr BoUt 1 HoUr An WrOtE iN mI pOeM bOoK wEn I hApPeNeD tO gEt A fUkN nOsE bLeEd... GrRrRrR i H8 DeM wEl YeA iM sTiL sAd An FeEl InViSiBlE tO tHe WoRlD..... oNcE aGaIn!! N i MiSs EvErY1 An I gOiN tO oZ iN 3 DaYz WoW i DnT eVeN wAnA gO nOw WaTz RoNg WiTh Me? WeL iM oFf NoW k sO iL sToP bItChIn, CyA!!
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* pOeM i 4t WaZ kEwL *

Feeling: sick
OF aLL ThE fRiEnDs I'vE eVeR mEt, YoU'rE tHe OnE I wOn'T fOrGeT. AnD If I dIe BeFoRe YoU dO i'LL Go To HeAvEn AnD wAiT fOr YoU i'LL gIvE tHe AnGeLs BaCk ThEiR wInGs AnD rIsK tHe LoSs Of EvErYtHiNg jUsT tO pRoVe My FrIeNdShIp Is TrUe I'm ThAnKfUl To HaVe A fRiEnD lIkE yOu
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* uPdAtEd FiNaLi LoL *

Feeling: cheerful
SoWi I aInT uPdAtEd MuCh LaTeLy BuT i JuS wAnNa SaY i BeEn ReAlI bUsY aY.. WeL i GeTtIn A nU cElFoNe SoOn It GoN b A pUsH 2 TaLk 1 n YeA iM rEaLi XcItEd.. BeCoZ i Go 2 oZzY oN dA 10tH tA gO n C mI dAd N fAmIlY oVa DeR!! Oh YeA i gOt HeApZ oV pIx 2 sO iF u WaNt SuM jUsT lEt Me KnO oR aDd Me 2 mSn CoZ i DuNo HoW 2 pUt PiX oN hErE lOl mI eMaIl AdDy Iz... sexi_pw1ncez69a@hotmail.com n Um YeA i DuNo WaT 2 WrItE aY bT yEa I wIl TrY uPdAtE wEnEvA i PoSiBlY cAn K sOwI iTz NoT mUcH oV aN eNtRy N iT kInDa BoRiNg BuT uMz YeA lOl lUv Ya XoXoX
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* Do U eVeN cArE *

Feeling: tense
wel ima kinda feelin a lil bit betta.. jordz stil nt talkin 2 me n i feel bad coz ov cutting mi wrists agen, i jus cnt help it nemorez, i luv him so much bt it hurtz so bad if only he knew wat it waz lyk in mi position, den d worst fing i stil lov him wid everyfing in me lyk alwayz n im tryna move on bt it feelz lyk he wont let me, i feel reali bad.. i needa smoke or sumin!!! im getin so stressed ot nw n sumtymz i wish fingz cud hav gone bak 2 d way dey wer in d daez wen i hada bf n wen me n jordz wer jus m8z, y do guyz alwayz fuk me up it hurts so bad.. duz it mke dem laugh wen im in pain, do dey kno i hav depression, do dey kno wat itz lyk 2 look in d mirror everydae n u fink ur gettin uglier az ppl dis u.. i wish i cud hav u bak jordz bt i gez itz in posible jus memba dem emailz i sent u. i stil gt d 1z u sent me bak in d daez wen u wer nice 2 me bt it al gud il try gt ova it coz i kno il hav 2 soona or later bt i shud b ok bt yea im kinda sleepi so ima write anuda entry 2mowo k!!
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* jUs SuM pOeMz *

Feeling: abused
I cAn'T tAke ThIs AnYmOrE, My PoOr HeArT iS sO vErY sOrE. It's FuLL oF aLL tHe oLd MeMoRiEs, ThAt I uSeD tO aNd nOw stiLL cHeRiSh, UntiL we MaKe mOrE tHeY wiLL jUsT sIt ThErE aNd PeRiSh. HeLp Me PuT nEw MeMoRiEs In My oLd HeArT, So tHeN we'LL nEvEr, EvEr HaVe To StAy ApArT. i SeE uS tOgEtHeR yEaRs FrOm NoW sTiLL HoLdInG HaNdS lIkE 2dAy YoU wOuLd TeLL mE u LoVe Me AnD nEvEr LeT gO nOt TiLL tHe EnD oF tHe DaY... evErYtHiNg BoUt YoU mAkEs Me SmIle ThE rEaSoNs I rEaLLy DoNt KnOw BuT lIkE i SaId I do LiKe YoU.. nOw I cAn LeT iT aLL sHoW No MaTtEr WhAt...ThErE's AlwAyS tHaT bOy ThAt YoU cAnT sToP tHiNkInG oF... tHaT's AlWaYs In ThE bAcK oF yOuR mInD.. tHe ReAsOn No OnE eLsE iS rIgHt ThE rEaSoN yOu CaNt FiNd tHe pErfEcT gUy YoU kNoW wHo hE iS.. bUt YoU jUsT wOnT aDmIt.. It'S tO sAd FoR yOu..BeCaUsE hE rEfUsEs He SaYs It IsNt RiGhT, BuT oNe DaY hE'LL rEaLiSe WhY hE's AlOnE aT nIgHt
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* BoUt MoI *

Feeling: sluggish
Name:~BaYbEa gUrL~ Gender: Female Marital Status: Single Location: Wellington, New Zealand Occupation: -x- HaIrDrEsSeR -x- A Little About Me i LiVe In A hOuSe, iM 16, iMa ShOrTeE n UmZ, i LoV sUm1 hU dNt LoV mE cOz He LoVz SuM1 Hu LiVeZ iN oZ , iM aDdIcTeD 2 tXtIn.. i LoV mOoSiK, pArTiEz, GeTiN a LiL bIt DrUnK, AcOrDiN 2 pAuL iMa SwEeTiBuMz 2 LoL Favourite Things (¯`v´¯) - LoViN sUm1 `*.¸.*´ hU dNt LoV mE :'( x mI fOnE x BuBbLeZ x CuDdLy TeDdYz x WrItInG pOeMz x SiNgInG x mI bEsTiEz x sHoPpInG x LaUgHiNg x mI cAmErA [PoSeR] x BeIn A dIk x HaViN fUn N yEa DaTz BoWt It ^^^ Favourite Quote **~ u FoUnD mE WeN nO oNe ElSe WaZ lOoKiN HoW dId U kNo JuSt WeR I wUd B? u BrOkE tHrOuGh AlL oF mI cOnFuSiOn D uPs N d DoWnZ n U sTiL dIdNt JuDgE mE I gUeSs DaT u SaW wAt NoBoDy CuD c **~
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* OnLy 16 *

Feeling: popular
ShE wAs LiViNg A bRoKeN lIfE ShE tHoUgHt No OnE cArEd ShE aLwAyS wAnTeD tO bE aLoNe AlL bEcAuSe Of A lOvE sHe OnCe ShArEd. He BrOkE hEr HeArT He MaDe HeR cRy He ToLd HeR lIeS AlL tHiS mAdE hEr WaNt To DiE.. ShE sWoRe To ThE rAzOr ShE wOuLd Be ItS bEsT fRiEnD ShE cOuLdN't GeT hEr MiNd OfF HiM AlL tHiS tUrNeD oUt BaD iN tHe EnD. He FoUnD hEr DeAd He ReAd ThE nOtE He CoUlDn'T bElIeVe It In It iS wHaT sHe WrOtE: "I LoVeD yOu WiTh AlL mY hEaRt BuT aLl YoU dId WaS TeAr Me ApArT. Im SoRrY aNd I sTiLl LoVe YoU I jUsT wIsH yOu CoUlD hAvE sEeN WhAt YoU dId To Me NoW I'm DeAd AnD oNlY sIxTeEn.."
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