friends are my life. but what happens when you dont feel yourself around them anymore?? because feelings are coming now. i dont understand. this is odd for me. i thought something was good...and someone else had such a different view on it. for once in my life why cant things just go how i want it. i promise one time i will get what i deserve. mabye if i dont put my heart out there to get stepped on i will be rewarded. i got the laguna beach book today. i made an awesome mix. im being obsessed with making new cds. i need san diego. two weeks. too bad one person will not enjoy my presence. wow. i love being negative. love. &hearts

you hate me were arugeing but im over it. ive tried numerous times you wont accept it. im done. end of story. you never wanted to be stabbed in the back but i guess you dont mind doing it to someone else. you said so many harsh words to me very christian? i dont think so. ill forgive you but i will never forget. i wish that we could just be mature about it but that wont happen. this has been a waste...

so tonight=totally awesome. dinner: pick up stix driving: dirt road [northbank] pahah. tasias house blakes house to get ryan carveboarding: blake [video tapes] ryan dippin dots: total party driving: to go get tyler carveboarding: tyler running into the garage priceless parking: creppy lady with her dog driving/parking: the witches house taking random pics driving home: good times tomorrow: grams walking with court and blake tasias house. co-ed sleeping. so i basically had so much fun tonight. i really dont miss someone until they are gone. i love hanging out with everyone. big groups are amazing. i love it. oh man. good freaking times. i love you court and blake. you guys are so awesome. summer=running on the beach. heck yeah. i love my friends. they are my world. &hearts

so i hate it when i neglect some friends and then when something goes wrong i run back to them and they welcome me with open arms. i feel so bad. but it wont happen again. i love them to much to do that. again. they are the best things in my life. jena and tasia. awesome kids. love them to death. dinner tonight was fun. red robin for life. got to love the cheap theater too. too bad i stepped in gum. whos dumb enough to throw their gum on the ground? seriously. dumb little kids. we saw "shes the man". fricking hilarious. i love it much. channing tatum. wow what a hottie. well night to all. -amber

introduction to me. i suppose. i had one of these before. it got deleted. bummer. well here goes the survey: 1. Are you currently mad at someone? -umm...upset/sad but not mad. 2. Which of your friends has the worst temper? -i dont think any of them. 3. Have you ever thrown something at anyone? -yeah. matt. all the time. 4. Does your face turn red when youre angry? -its red all the time. im a rosey girl. 5. When you're mad do you prefer to stare angrily or yell and scream? -i cant stand yelling. so stare angrily. ORANGE-- excitement: 1. Has anyone ever thrown you a surprise party? -yeah. my sixteenth. it was half/half. 2. Are you easily excited? -um...im easily amused...so yeah. 3. What event is coming up that your most excited about?? -SUMMER. 4. Which of your friends is most excitable? -umm...all of them. we have lots-o-fun. 5. If you won a million dollars what would be your first thought? -Buy an Audi. for sure. 6. If you could have anything right now what would it be? -getting to know this one boy. YELLOW-- self discovery: 1. Name? -Amber. 2. Where were you born? -CMH. represent. 3. Whats your main goal in life? -to be the best ER nurse San Diego has ever seen. 4. Do you want to have children? -yeah. two. 5. How do you want to die? -in my sleep. its painless. GREEN-- opinions: 1. Sex before marriage? -its not for me. im going to wait. 2. Gay Marriage? -free choice. 3. Lowering the drinking age? -i think it should be 18. so yes. 4. Capital Punishment? -i dont know. 5. Abortion? -only for rape. 6. Recycling? -yeah. i like the money. ahha.