I'm realllly going to miss her.

this weekend was interesting. got PLASTERED at brittany's going away party. ex-boyfriend was there, i called my BOYFRIEND crying about my ex. I feel so bad, but things are okay now. thursday we will be dating for a month, and it should be a good day. full of opiates and lion king. and um, some new things. looooove it.

things with evan are great. but other things are going downhill. i realize i have really bad anxiety. i cant control it. but its why most people cant handle me. i guess in this case i realize who my true friends are... i really just wish there was something to do to change this part of me.

i really hope i'm making the right choice. note to self; grow a backbone.

fuck new years. im not changing a thing. this is how i feel.