Restraint

Your head feels bust

And your mouth tastes of rust

From blood gargled and spat out last night

And you want to cry

Feel so messed up inside

But everyone says it'll all be alright

It's hard to believe

When you're on your knees

And the faith and the hope have dried up

But you try to smile

In blatant denial

Of the fact that your heart feels tied up

A faint old tune plays

As you sleep through each day

In a bed made of ash, built for one

The drug is right there

But you feel too scared

Of twhat they'll say when they see what you've done

The pills should've helped

Instead you just felt

Like everything had become so much clearer

Waking each day

To suffer in vain

And ending it knowing the answer

Spontaneous thoughts

Outline in white chalk

The person they thought you could be

Inconsitency bends

Your image of strength

Always brings you back down to your knees

If you could just feel

If your wounds would just heal

Then it might disappear this time 'round

But dreams are all lies

And everyone dies

Nothing matters when you're underground