In complete disbelief Grace looked upon Brianna. What could she say? Was there anything that she could muster too say? She guessed she was a bit taken back by the idea that someone would want to listen to... her. Grace went to open her mouth in a way that she never thought she could. It was an open mouth shock look. And as she was about to say something the bell rang. "aw this is bull. Just when we made some progress. (laughs) i sound like a fuckin shrink (laughs)." "Hey do you want to hang out after school? Just to get away from your house?" asked Brianna. "Hell yea i do!" "(laughs) well meet me on the west side of the building after school we'll go hang out." "ok. see you later." Grace was headed to leave with her books in her hand when she felt someones hand grab her arm. Ready to be hit Grace shielded herself with her free arm, dropping her books. "whoa whoa its ok i just wanted to thank you for listening to me and not.... judging me. I've never had that before in my life." "O (nervous laugh) lol i thought u were someone else.. No problem I'm always here to listen.. to bad no one else knows that. I gotta go i'll see you after school." A bit embarassed she gave herself away, Grace hurried out of the cafeteria. The rest of her day had gone by her in a breeze. And before she knew it school was over and she was eagerly waiting to meet her friend to escape her reality.. She walked out the west door and saw a group of people standing there smoking. Now smoking is not a shock to Grace so she walked past them, and to her surprise.. she heard. "EY Grace over here!"

"Well lets put it this way i wasn't in this world when i made a mistake" laughed Brianna. "I dont quite follow your gonna have to explain this to me." "GODDAM your innocent. Alrite i'll say it plain and simple i was high as a kite, And the the stuff that kept me up there was coke. And i came to school like a dumb fuck ahaha" Grace just was baffled she couldn't muster up anything to say at this point. "I came to school and this bitch was messing with me and i wasn't in the mood. Ahaha you see when im high i get pissed. And i beat the shit outta her. I aint even playing" Brianna seemed to pause and become unusally somber. "I beat her so bad... i made her blind in one eye." Brianna stared off accross the lunchroom. "I just kept hitting her. I could't feel a thing at all. So i hit her harder and harder. I saw blood and i still didn't stop. I thought this was the funniest thing in the world. Her screamin in pain because i was winnin in this fight. I thought i was teaching her a lesson. When really i was teachin myself. It took 4 cops to get me off her. And even when they picked me up i was still swinging because i hadn't realized they had picked me off the ground. They handcuffed my hands behind my back. All i kept saying was "i was playin we were playing" i dont even remember what the cops said to me when i said that. I dont remember the car ride but i got to this clinic and they did blood work and i passed out cuz i had done too many hits of coke. When i woke up i was in a room with bars and 5 girls staring down at me. And from then on i lived there. This year was my first year out. I'm still doing some city work but its fine. I haven't seen the girl i beat up but when i had my court date a few weeks ago they said she was legally blind in one eye, i guess i broke her nose too. Ionno i wasn't really paying attention..I couldn't.. You kno when your scared shitless the world around you is quiet and everything is slow motion.. thas how it was that day. I'm sure you're wondering why i bring this up.. but i just dont have anyone to talk to. Because rumors can start pretty quick. And i dont wanna get kicked outta this school. I hate packin up and leaving. yea.. thas about it... just had to get that out." Dumbfounded Grace just sat there. She couldn't believe what she had just heard. She could only utter out. "what about your parents?" "o them? My dad's the one who gave me the coke he's in jail right now. My mom.. she's a nut job really" Grace couldn't understand how Brianna can talk so matter o factly about something this horrible. "B-But how.." "ehh dont worry about knowing wut to say. This is one of those matters that has nothing really to say or be done. One of those topics you talk about and they hang there in the air with nothing to say."Brianna replied. "I wish i could erase that. Erase whatever pain you had that made u do the coke." "Yea me too. But sometimes you gotta suffer to get to your happiness. Wut about you?"asked Brianna "What do you mean wut about me?" "You look like you've got a story to tell." Brianna stated. "Mines more like a novel." "Open a page and start reading then." Brianna chuckled.

"Hey loser." sigh "O i'm sorry i didn't address you by your name... Hello Miss I have no wardrobe"said Heather "O i'm sorry were you talking to me? I'm sorry I don't talk to people with no personalities."retored Grace. "Excuse me?" snapped Heather. "Yeah thas' right i said it bitch, back the fuck off!" Heather walked up to Grace in a defensive manner. And stood face to face with Grace. "Well do something about it." said Heather Grace took to the challenge and stepped even closer. Heather took the first swing and Grace ducked and jumped up and upper cut Heather right in her jaw, sending her sprawling backward. "Not so tough now are we?" said Grace. beeep beeep beeep beeep beeep Grace jolted up and slamed her hand on the alarm clock. "Damn that was the best dream i ever had!!" laughed Grace. Today was somehow looking good to Grace. For the first time this whole year she had a reason to come to school. She had someone to talk to. ANd amazingly nothing else mattered. NOt even Heather. She didn't eat breakfast today she headed to school early. The first few classes of the day seemed to go by so fast. And before she knew it lunch was upon her. She walked into the lunchroom and looked around for her new friend. She found Brianna in the back corner of the lunchroom. She hadn't realize that the lunchroom was even that big before. Probally because she restricted herself to one place her whole high school career. "Hey Grace. How ya doing today?" asked Brianna "i'm good how about you?' "Ehh u kno how it goes u have your good days and your bad days. ANd today.. is one mediocre day." "Ooo i'm sorry, wut's bothering you?" "AHAH ur funny actin like you really care." Grace was a lil taken back by this comment. and asked "what do you mean? I wanna know what's wrong so i can cheer you up." Brianna looked a while at Grace and finally said "hmm you really wanna kno whats wrong? Ok this is new. Well see i've got a lot of things on my mind. My mom's been gone for a while now and i got no clue where the fuck she is. That whore's probally out there.. never mind. She's just out there." "O... i'm really sorry. U can crash with me if you'd like." "naw havin the house to myself is kool 'n all but i just worry about that whore sometimes. sigh and i guess i dont kno what to do about this other dilemma i got going on." Grace cocked her head in confussion. "what's that?" sigh Well see i used to live in this other state in this other school. N well i got kicked out for this (Brianna put her hands up and make the quotes with her fingers) "cry for attention" thing i did back at my school. And i guess it was bad enough for me to get kicked out" "what is it?" asked Grace

"She bought it completly" "Every bit of it? The scars and everything?" "And then some." "Good, keep this up and that nasty little rumor about you won't leak out to the school." *** Grace was feeling good about her self. She had met someone who could relate in some manner. SHe'd never let anyone know she was a cutter. Nor did she allow anyone to see her cry. At least since her mothers death. Maybe there was a bit of hope for something to go right since her mothers' death. not today i'm going to stay happy today, no thinking of sad thoughts...not today Today wasn't her day to go to the shelter and since she lost her job Grace had no choice but to go home. She walked up to the door, put her key in the door knob and prepared herself for some sort of horror. She slowly turned the key and cracked the door slightly open.... nothing.. So she opened the door and closed her eyes.. nothing.. No one was home. Grace was in disbelief this was something she'd never seen before.. Probally didn't have enough liquor so they had to go out. A coupple of hours later, still there was no one home so Grace made herself dinner. NOt that was a new thing but first time in her own home had she had a meal. Still at 10 o'clock no one was home. And as crazy as it sounded Grace was worried. Dispite the fact of the abuse and the drinking she still cared. But she knew she'd be yelled at more for caring. So she went to wash up and go to bed. Her brusies were slightly darker since this morning. Then again maybe it was the make up. After washing her face she noticed that her face wasn't as swelled up as it was before. "o well, they'll go away." She had forgotten that she had cut again today so when she looked down and saw more lines than she saw on Brianna. It wasn't until today had she realized how many times she had cut herself. "i'm going to stop this." she said outloud as if someone was listening. She washed up her arm and went to bed with better hopes for tomorrow and a smile on her face.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!?!" hollered a voice. Grace didn't turn around to see who the person was. THere wasn't time for that she had come up with an excuse, she refused to be taken to some shrink to pretend to care. "I scraped my arm against a sharp edge of the stall. I had to get some toliet paper to stop the bleeding. Is there a problem?" "No i just ment what are you doing wearing that sweater it is sooo not this century." Heather.. how did i not see this coming? "Next time wear something i can make more fun of.. k?" And with that Heather left the bathroom leaving behind her a trail of anger. "God i hate her!!" Grace yelled. "You and the rest of the school." came a quiet voice from behind her. Grace turned around quickly to be faced with a girl she had never seen before. "i'm sorry i'm Brianna.." She outstretched her hand to Grace in a friendly manner Grace wiped her hand on her paper towel and took her new aquantiance's hand. "Hi i'm Grace." "You seem like your going through some rough times.*she paused and looked at Grace's arm* You'd better get that arm of yours checked out." "ahh.. DONT tell anyone please.. i couldn't bare the stares i.." "Dont worry about it.' Brianna lifted her sleeve to reveal an arm full of multiple dark lines "Your secret is safe with me. Maybe we have more in common than you know." "Do you have lunch now?" "Actually, lunch is over but yea i would normally have lunch at this time." "Do you think maybe we could talk tomorrow. Dont tell neone but i sit alone so maybe at least tomorrow we could talk?" "HAHa you kno if we took all the people at school who sit alone we'd dominiate this school. I"m one of those people too. Well i'll see you tomorrow i gotta be leaving." "Bye." Maybe.. for the first time i'll have someone accept me for me... no no Grace dont get your hopes up.

Grace entered her biology class with her head low so that no one could get a look at her face. She handed her late slip to the teacher and went to her desk, looked around and saw everyone with their eyes attentivly working on disecting their frogs. Good no one noticed me. "Hey raggity ann, today isn't clown day." chuckled a high pitch voice from behind her. "YEA i just got a call MR. Rogers said you could borrow his sweater, not keep it."laughed Nicole sigh,so much for not being noticed "HAa ha where were you this morning we missed making fun of you, we were worried we couldn't start our day off right without you here to make fun of." joked Heather. Grace grabbed the disection tool on her desk and held it tightly in her hand. RIIIIINNG Grace was about loose it. She didnt' know what to do. IF she cried she'd get attention and someone would want to know everything. IF she said nothing Heather and Nicole would tear her apart. And now Her face was hurting and her head was pounding. Instead of going to lunch she went to the bathroom to avoid all human contact. She threw her sweater and her backpack on the floor on the floor and looked in the mirror and was horrifyed at the image it reflected back at her. Her makeup smeared over her face from wiping away attempts to show her pain.. How did this happen? If my mom were here none of this would have happened. she couldn't bare it anymore. I have to get rid of this pain While searching through her backpack she found the disection tool she had grabbed onto earlier. She stared at it in dismay. Could this simple piece of metal be the answer to her pain? Grace took the blade and pushed it to her flesh on her upper arm and felt a warm sensation flow over her arm. She looked down and had cut herself. In disbelief she threw the tool accros the room and grabbed toilet paper and covered it up. not againGrace began to cry. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!?!" hollered a voice

"Has anyone see or heard from Grace?" questioned the teacher. The silence of the class indicated that no one had heard or seen Grace. Then in the back of the class she noticed a hand and that gave the teacher a bit of relief. "yes Heather have you heard anything about Grace?" "Yea i heard her say that she wasn't coming to school because she couldn't bare be seen in her raggityclothes." Laughter rang through the classroom. But the teacher knew that the laughter was only to please Heather. Now her fear of where Grace was continued to grow. "Well i'm sure that she wouldn't want to be seen in your clothes Heather!" snapped Joe. an echo of 'ooos' and 'dangs' rang throughout the class. "OK thats enough class!" yelled the teacher. "open your books and review your disection notes before you start your frog disection." *** Grace looked in the reflection of her face in the window of the city bus. She woke up late and didn't have time to walk to school so she had to use her lunch money to take the city bus. In her reflection she saw an attempt to hide her bruises with makeup. She had a black eyeshadow on and put on a ton of powder. Even from the faint reflection she could see that it was an obvious attempt. Her clothes weren't brand name but they were in semi style. She wore a burgandy sweater twice her size and underkneath she had a pink tank top and she wore tore jeans. She wanted to cry but knew if she did so, the silent stares from everyone around her would only cause more attention to her. So she sucked it up and prepared herself for school. Walking up to the place where she felt no safer than in her own home, with her head hung low she opened the door and went to class.

When Grace got home her father greeted her at the door with a bottle of Vodka in his hand. "Dad how much have youbeen drinking" "None of your damn businiess u little know it all" Grace began to walk to the stairs to avoid her father in his drunken rage. "You little twit your father is talkin to you." squeeked a voice of a woman not high on life... "Who are you to talk to me like your my mother!?" Grace hollered back. "I"M DAMN WELL CLOSE ENOUGH TO BE YOUR MOTHER!!" "DONT YOU EVER.... EVER compare yourself to my mother every again or i swear.." smack "Don't talk to Tracie like that.. you hear me?" Grace stood there in the middle of two people not in touch reality and didn't know what to do. There was no way to get through to them and talk to them civilized.. so she did the next best thing....

At a nearby George Webb Joe looked at the clock... It's almost 6 o'clock why isn't Grace here? Sudden the doors swung open and Grace ran inside and dashed to the back of the store.. When she hung up her jacket, she sensed there was someone behind her. "Grace we need to talk." Grace turned around and saw that her boss was standing there with a pink slip. Hold back the tears Grace... Hold them back. "This has been the 10th time this month that you have late, I understand that you are going through a hard time but I can't keep letting you do this, it's hurting the business and i can't keep you here." Grace felt her eyes shift to the floor, making sure that her boss didn't see her pain. "Sorry Grace, i'm going to have to let you go." after he said that, he was gone from sight. And Grace decieded to get her mind off of her loss and went to the counter ready to serve out her last day of work. "What happpened?" Asked Joe. "Nothing." "What another promotion for our perfect employee Grace?" chuckled Joe. Grace just walked away. Just when ithought my day couldn't get any worse. Proven wrong again. At the end of her shift it was well past 8 and she still had to get home and do her homeowork. She headed out towards the door and was ready to leave when all of a sudden the sky light up and she heard the deaftly crack of thunder. "figures." Grace sighed. ANd with that she headed out the door. NO umbrella, no jacket and no hope. As the rain began to pick up in strength Grace stopped and looked up and asked the sky "What do you want from me? What have i done wrong?!!? Is there NO pleasing you? You took my one ray of hope and left me with nothing!WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME?" she screamed. Then she just cried.. and cried. No one could tell she was crying because the rain was so intense, no one cared to stop anyway. They were to involved with their lives to notice someone else's pain. *** "Did you see Grace today?" asked Heather "OmiGod i kno how could she come to school wearing those rags?" laughed Nicole. "Seeing her at school is the highlight of my day. Ahaha If i were her, i'd stay home. I couldn't bare to be seen like that." complained Heather. "I know, we should just give her money and tell her to by herself at least one decent outfit!" joked Nicole "ahaha good one!" said Heather. "OH MY GOD i like soo have an awesome plan!"exclaimed Nicole "WHAT?"Heather asked excitedly "Just wait until tomorrow at school! IT'll be a day that Grace will never forget!"

"Next time you won't be so lucky!!!" boomed a voice from the living room. Grace didnt need it.. she didnt want to be yelled at, so to keep herself from the torture she ran up to her room and shut the door. She threw her backpack on the floor and fell on her bed and stared up at her celing. "why me?" cried Grace... suddenly her body began to shake and tears fell from her eyes.. She picked up her photo album and looked thro all the happy faces she loved so dearly. When she came across a certain photo she nearly lost her whole composure. It was a picture of herself and her mother embracing each other in a loving hug. The photo became fuzzy..and with that she closed the photo album. Suddenly she noticed the clock. "O SHIT" she whispered. She grabbed her brush, untangled the knots in her hair and began to run back to the door. "i'm going to be late.. again" SHe neared the door, she was almost there when she heard.. "Leaving again?" demanded a voice. "i have to go to the shelter and then work." Grace said. "Don't expect us to have dinner waiting for you." "i never do." Grace retorted. And before the man could start an argument Grace had run out of the house and ran to the shelter. When she got there she finally felt a bit of safty. Grace worked at the elderly shelter, where she got food and medicine ready for them and where she talked to everyone, and all the people knew her by name. She enjoyed herself there. She didn't have to feel like she was in the way or not cared for. IT was where she could go to get away from all the sadness and horrible things going on in her life. "Sweet child, yah still miss er don't cha?" asked a sweet voice. Startled by this comment she turned around and found herself looking into the eyes of Mrs. Jones, a widowed women from Alabama. Graces's voiced cracked, "Yes... yes i do. And i always will." "Bless yer heart, but don't sit 'round and think 'bout her not bein' here w/ yuh, becuz yer gonna miss out on 'tunites and memories now, child i know it's hard I know yer pain, i've been where yuh are now. But yer mom will be sadened by yuh missin' out on yer life. She'd hate to be the reason yuh couldn't live yer life." "I know Mrs. Jones, and i appericate you helping, i have to go.. take care Mrs. Jones" I dont have the heart or the courage to tell her that my life is to much of a hell to make the most of my life thought Grace. Looking at the clock again Grace noticed it was well after 5... "O SHIT, i'm going to be late!!"

It had been a day Grace wanted to forget. One of those days at school where nothing could go right. Every class had something bad happen. Now that the school day was over she could only dwell on what had happened. It wouldn't get out of her mind. Dispite her best efforts she couldn't see the good about any part of her day. As the trees swayed in the breeze and the dogs barked Grace could feel in her body that the end of her day was going to be similar to the be begining of her day. She rounded the corner.. She wasn't even close to her house yet and she could smell the rain about to pour on her. At this point she didn't care if it did rain.. She stopped and looked toward the sky "YOU MIGHT AS WELL RAIN NOW!! MY DAY COULDN'T GET ANY WORSE!!" she screamed to the sky as if it would answer back. After a few moments of her tantrum she began to head home.. No matter how slow she walked her house still came into view too quicky. As she neared the door of her house she took a deep breath and pulled out her key and let herself in. NO sooner had she put her foot in the door she heard a plate smash against the wall

So this story starts off where all the others do.. Pain and frustration. This is a story about teens.. living their teenage life with all the drama teens go thro..