Where is my Edward?

there's one thing i want to say, so i'll be brave you were what i wanted i gave what i gave i'm not sorry i met you i'm not sorry it's over i'm not sorry there's nothing to say your ex-lover is dead. by Stars. wonderful song.

Just about every boy I ever liked made a cameo in my dream last night.

Please don't do this. Just your presence will ruin everything that I have built. I like the way my life is going right now. But if you come back, my old habits will return as well.

It's hard to let go of him.

You probably won't read this for a couple of weeks. Maybe even months. But I'm saying this more for me than for you. I've kept my heart reserved for you this entire time. I haven't let anyone else in because I've been waiting for you to come back and claim your spot. And I was fine with that for a while. But now. Now I can't do that anymore. Ryan loves me. He does everything for me. And the only thing he wants is have me love him back. And I can't. Because of you. I'm afraid to lose you, but I've already lost you. I'm not even sure I ever really had you. This thing between us has been over for a very long time. Yet, I still wait around for you. Yet, I still check the air fare to New York. I don't know. The point of this message is to tell you goodbye. So goodbye Jon. Thank you for giving me hope on dark days. Thank you for listening. Thank you for loving me. Take care of yourself please. --Kelsey

My hopes for the future: 1. Affordable rapid mass transportation 2. Sanitized environments 3. A world that is not dependent on oil 4. Auto-pilot for cars More to come.

Last night as I layed in his arms, All I could think about was you.

He was always my favorite thing to write about. And now that he's provided me with new material, I don't have to urge to use it. My muse is my killer.

The best news I've heard all week: The Disney Channel is making a sequel to High School Musical.

These summer nights are marked by the sound of fireworks. The 9:30 firework show at Disneyland brings back memories that have absolutely nothing to do with the happiest place on Earth, but that everything to do with the activities I was doing last summer with the booms in the background.

There is so much that is wrong. But I'm afraid to talk about it Because the next step would be to resolve it somehow. It's easier if this just remains unspoken

We give each other hickies just for the hell of it.

New boyfriend Old habits

"For over 14 years Mad Science has provided top-quality educational and entertaining science programs for children in grades K-6." They also provide me with hot, nerdy science teachers. I'm having one of my daycare girls set me up with Mr. B, one of the Mad Science teachers. I'll keep you updated.

There was a guest speaker in my human sexuality class. He showed graphic pictures of individuals with various sexual transmitted diseases and infections. He accomplished his mission. I left class never wanting to have sex again.

He's sweet, But I'm afraid I'll end up making him hate me. Just like all the others.

I hate season finales. Drama, heartache, and tenison are packed into one final episode of the season. But wait, They made it eight minutes longer. No, an hour! No, a two-parter! Tune in tomorrow to see the conclusion And guess what! That episode will be two hours long! In the end, I'm still left wanting more. That's the idea of it, you see. They leave you wanting. Because who will she chose? Did he really die? What are they going to do now? Your favorite shows drive you to insanity. Enjoy a summer filled with unanswered questions and specualation. We'll see you in the fall. I hate season finales.

[There's a young girl that wrote and sings the following song. I've never related more to anything else in this world. She loved with a boy that was geography impossible to love. I don't know her at all. But we have the same story.] "Baby, I'll attack a miner Steal his hat and his shovel, Get a map and dig a long tunnel That leds from my room to yours I'll install trapdoors. Baby, you should send me a lock of your dark hair I'll take it to a lab and see what they can do there They'll clone you, send a copy back, And leave you here."

Honestly, Get over it, grow up, and go away.