Well well well. Sitdiary finally works Where do I start Hmm i'm madly in love with my boyfriend We fight alot, but i couldn't live without him problem is, hes moving 3 hours away and i'm heartbroken I havent slept since 9 am yesterday So its almost been 24 hours. I don't awnna go to school except at the same time i do to see everyone asldjf

Tomorrow is the day of silence at school. It'll be pretty rad. Today was cool. I hate when Russell gets to school late cause i'm a faggot obsessed girlfriend. [notreally] && so yeah hahaha. It just sucks alot. OH WELL I HEART HIM.. alot ahahahhah we haven't got in a fight yet. I'm trying not to jinx it. Cause i'd really rather never fight with him. I love you ♥ that post was gay no drama to right about so idk ahhaha

Well today I had to go to the dentist and get my face fixed. And it turns out my appointment is at 10 so I was sleeping in and stuff && i get ready && my mom comes and gets me for my appointment. Well i get there and they do all this stuff to my face. Well turns out they had to numb me and shit. So i was numb all throughout the day until like 12:30. Which caused me to not be able to feel when Russell was kissing me. But then during break it was all good Ugh he makes me so fudging happy I don't think anyone has any clue how happy he makes me either. Hes seriously the only reason I go to school anymore. Besides friends && shit. Cause I know he'll be there. Which is always nice. =] Its been really nice outside lately && i love it. I'm glad summer is starting to really... idk hahahaha. Russell is so adorable with stuff. He cares so much about me && i've never really had that before. So its kind of a different feeling you know. But a good feeling. My mom found out he was 17, she definatly wasn't happy about that. But she realizes that i'm gonna date him whether she likes him or not so she won't do or say shit. He wants me to go to prom with him since hes a junior but my mom won't let me i dont think since she thinks all he wants is sex. Which could possibly be true. But let ME figure that out for myself. I really doubt he's that kinda guy. Hes already told me that he doesn't care about sex && he doesn't wanna do anything until i'm ready. SO IDK thats long enough for me. <333333

Well I have a boyfriend now. Yup yup. Well since Friday, So its been what 3 days now, oh boy. Hahhaha but no, i'm really happy that i'm with him. Kerry and her boyfriend are fkn adorable. I take back alot of the bad stuff i say about her man. Just because he's proved me wrong && i take back everything i said about kerry just because I shouldnt post entries when i'm pissed off. && none of the things i said were true. Anyways I stayed home today cause Michelle broke my face lmaoo jkk even though something did happen regarding my face. I better get it fixed today so I can go back to school && see everyone. Hmm i'm pretty bored && nothing exciting has happened lately besides the fact of me getting a boyfriend that makes me really happy. I would tell you about my weekend but that would take to long. You would have just had to have been there. if you weren't then to bad you missed out =] Anyways im done for now i'm sure through out the day i'll think of interesting things to put on here and ishh ♥

That it would come soon enough yupppp he kissed me on the lips but from what everyone else saw it looks like i was the one that leaned in Which i didn't but they can think what they want we kissed thats all that matters hahahaha any ways good day Russel didn't ask me out yet. but i'm sure hes getting to it I guess maybe guys need more time for this kinda thing. Oh well I've been having tummy-aches for the past 3 days which cant be healthy MAYBE ITS ALL THE BUTTERFLIES && stuff or its cause i haven't been hungry && it kicks in when its to late OH WELL i'm good now Everyone was pretty entertaining today just cause they were all stoned as hell It was pretty much the most i'd laughed in a while I'm doneeeeeee <3

I've been soooo happy for all of today. Lets just say today was amazing I found out Russle likes me && that he wants to be with me && all that cute stuff I love his hugs so much He hugs me different then everyone else he hugs me for like ever like he never wants to let go. && it gives me butterflies He walked me to my bus today && HE KISSED ME ON THE CHEEK i was hoping for the lips but that'll come soon enough ahhaha hes tried butttt i never have lipgloss on lmao im so dumb so now i'll just wear it 24/7 anyways im happy <3333

Today was pretty awesome I took some happy pills [only 4] && was happy for the first half of school. Like hyper as a mo-fo. But still fun. Then after 2nd period [lunch time] I was like insanely depressed. Like i was coming off my happiness Oh wow did that suck. But then when Kerry showed me this certain text message i couldn't help but be all smiles as usual. && then it just kinda stayed good So pretty much Kerry&&Me don't even get to sleep in for late start this week. Oh well we make the best of it. Lol! Anyways idk what to write im pretty happy =] && thats about all

Well Kerry got a boyfriend Its her second real bf in like.. forever So i'm really happy for her it kinda just pisses me off how she acts when hes around. -she ignores me && marilyn when hes around -shes completly different around him -he is all she can talk about && -hes before ALL her friends in her top 8 which pisses me off cause friends are there forever && boys are just whenever which pisses me off that she'd even think of him as more important then any of her friends. maybe im just dumb but no way in hell would i EVER pick my bf over my friends. && never would i ignore them when he was around her excuse is that she sees him 25 minutes out of the day && thats not what im pissed about i'm pissed cause she doesn't even TALK to him && expects me to feel sorry for her cause she doesn't talk to him. but whatever i guess i love her no matter what unless she ditches me EVER for him. oh well shes in for a rude awakening especially since hes cheated on like 5 girls ONCE A CHEATER ALWAYS A CHEATER but i guess all i can do is warn her. && hope she gets it [thats all about that] Me && russel are talking ALOT more && shit. So i'm really happy about that. im such an attention whore when it comes to him I loooove being center of attention && idk. He just makes me feel all better when im sad so its cool to get his hugs && when he tries to make me warm && stuff thats all i guess

Today was blah. Lunch detention wasn't fun I had to be escorted to 501 for skipping so many lunch detentions so my lunch detention start 10 minutes before class was over. lmfao Anywyas goldenskate last night was a blast. can't wait to go again blah. i can't think of anything to talk about except i like this one boy. && hes KINDA off limit. not taken just off limits so idk. he gave me big hugs today woot woot well bye. i'm done alskdjflkasdf ♥

Josh truely out gayed himself this time. I ask him ONE simple question && he has like a fucking heart attack && he tells me 'i don't like you get over it' blahblahblah then bitches at me for 'freaking out' on him WHATEVERRRRR then the guy my friend Kerry absolutly adores decides to tell her hes gonna ask her out on Monday && then decides to go make love to some other girl. ugh i hate when my friends get betrayed. =[ its gayyyyy x 245235235 I need to find myself a boyfriend cause Josh isn't cuttin it anymore. lsakfjdlkasdjlfkjsadlf pointless entry of course.

So i'm gonna be using this diary alot in the next two weeks. Seeing as i'm grounded. Oh yay this diary is my only way to spill my feelings without my mom finding out && bitching at me for it. So i'll be using it alot. I'm really honestly more pissed off then i've been in my life. So my mom just came in my room and was like "two weeks was a little extreme. but if you continue to act like this i'll keep it at two weeks. if your nicer i'll make it a week" fuck her. I'm not gonna kiss her ass when shes the one that started it. ♥ i'm done.

It's been a couple days/weeks since i've updated. Its spring break so why not update now, Lol. Well hmm Saturday- Went to my dads Sunday- Went shopping && got hella clothes Monday- Hung out with Cate. Dyed her hair. Had to jack her second bottle of hair dye from Fred Meyer lmfao. Then went to the movie with Kayla && a bunch of other people. Went to Kaylas and spent the night. Drank coke && rum with barley any coke at all. Watched movies && shit. Tuesday- Went to kerry's dads house with Kerry. Went out to eat. Got to Kerry's dads went online watched movies. Camera whored and ate more food. Tried to pull an all nighter. Didn't work Wednesday- Had to wake up at 4:30 leaving me && kerry with 2 hours of sleep. Went to her grandmas got there at 6. Went back to bed. Woke up at 12. Ate, went on the computer. Walked to starbucks, Fred meyers && Baskin robbins. Got soaked in the rain walking home && then did my nails. Thats about it so far. Nothing ALL that exciting. Then the rest of the week is.. Thursday- Going tanning with Kayla then she's coming back to my house.. Maybe spending the night. Friday- Supposed to go to the mall with Shane. Then nothing else planned for that day. Saturday/Sunday- Nothing planned Hopefully I won't be TOO bored. Maybe i'll chill with Josh or something. If hes not being a prick. Maybe i'll give up on him hes not worth my time. Spring break is so amazing lmfao. I'm having to much fun to even think about guys or have the time to be sad. thank god. hopefully it'll stay that way. ¢¾

So hmm Today. Went to the movies with my friend Alisha Saturday I babysat my cousin && went to the mall with Michelle && Kerry && Friday I slept hahaha well idk I feel like kerry && michelle are like best friends and i'll never be like anywhere near as close to either of them. it sucks i'm never good enough for anyone Guys walk all over me. Use me. && Lead me on Girls talk shit about me start rumors && i've never had a best friend someone has always been closer to them Life is dumb. Josh is a bitch I can't help but read his comments to other girls. makes me wanna cry =

So its been a couple days since I have updated. I kinda forgot about this site. [Sorry guys] So anyways. I started out today good. Then I saw Josh. I figured he would talk to me cause I was probably like 5 feet away from him. No. He didn't. Me and Kerry were talking && him and his friends were just standing there. He didn't acknowledge the fact that I was even there. Once a-fucking-gain. So I was piiiiiiiiised. Like hardcore pissed. I wanted to punch something/someone. Not even cause he ignored me. Just because how he did it. And so I went downstairs on break. What do you know. There he is. Well I have I.S.S tomorrow. So I told his best friend Andy to get kicked out of class or something && come chill with me for a little. So him && Andy were down there talking to a couple more of his friends. And me knowing how jealous he gets. I go up and talk to Andy && completly act like Josh isn't there. That worked. Well Andy && all his friends left. So it was Me,Kerry&&Josh. So finally Josh says something to me. And I was like. "oh now you talk to me since all your friends are gone" and I started yelling at him in like a playfull manner type thingy. And he was like "well yeah" and by then I was just happy he talked to me. Well break was gonna be over in like 3 minutes so we started walking towards our block classes. && he talked to me then too. Then he hugged me. Woot I was happy haha. && Then he said something that pissed me off, i don't remember. It was like " God damn vegetarians " and idk haha. But then I was all happy. But still pissed that he like fucking ignored me like that for the second time. UGH. then after school i got a reallly good hug from him. And that made me happy-er. hahaha But anyways I have a headache. So i'm gonna go lay down && hopefully sleep. Then when I wake up call Josh like he told me too.

Okay so Josh && me were supposed to hang out yesterday night around 5 Anyone wanna make a educated guess about what happened We didn't fucking hang out He was supposed to call me when Andy [his best friend] got there cause he didn't know where it was we were meeting and andy did So this was at 5. I didn't hear from him until he got on msn at 9. he begs for me to forgive him and i guess i kinda gave in && so yeah Another fantastic day in the world of Ashleigh. I think I might like his friend. =x uh ohh

So today I was supposed to go to the mall with Josh at 12:30. And I was planning on going too. Except my mom decides that I have to bring a chick with me so me and Josh don't "do stuff" and so I couldn't find his number to call him. And his myspace said he was online. So I was like 'okay i'll message him on myspace and tell him i can't go' So i did that. And he never read it. So i was like. Alright this is gay. And I went to sleep and woke up and he still hadn't read them. So i feel bad. Cause like.. What if he went. And I wasn't there. And he thinks I ditched him or something. Gosh I just hope he isn't mad. I mean I would be if I was him.. But I just don't want him to be. But if he is I understand. laksflksd ♥ Hes never gonna wanna hang out again. ALTHOUGH. All the times we were supposed to hang out. He didn't come. So WHATEVER. I still feel bad though lmfao.. Damien is mad at me. It pretty much sucks. hopefully he'll get over it?

So pretty much I was supposed to hang out with Josh. But all the sudden "his mom is making him hang out with her" Bullshit, I hate him now. Hes such a liar. He asked about tomorrow and I decided to tell him I was busy. Fuck him and his making plans and breaking them. Now its my turn ♥ I love you Today sucks I hate the rain And boys And school And finals And presentations And all that gay school shit Early release tomorrow though. =]]

Okay so new entry already. Its only been like 10 minutes But okay I have this friend. and we used to be best friends. up until some bitch came along. And stole her from me. Well that bitch used to be my best friend. Until she got jealous of my bestfriend that i have now. so pretty much. She gets pissed at me for having a friend besides her. and then she goes and steals her from me. radlfkasjdf so we are talking again today. We talk once a week compaired to all day every day. and we haven't hung out in like 3 weeks, which is to long. we hang out every week usually.and now she is to busy for me i need a new best friend any takers?

Hmm today Nothing really all that exciting happened. I woke up late Which I usually do on Mondays. BUT I had a good reason I stayed up late working on my finals and I couldn't sleep until it was done seeing as it was due today. So yeah I went to math Did nothing I kinda dont remember what happened. Went to lunch ate food. Suprise suprise. and that might actually come as a suprise to you because everyone thinks im anorexic. Went to science. Turned in my final. Did nothing else but talk. Went to english, Did nothing but watch a movie and then came home. Thats about it exciting right? Not exactly. No one is online right now. And it pretty much is lame i like this kid Josh. We are hanging out tomorrow. Unless he can't find a place to hang out Cause i won't let him hang out at my house and his mom won't let him have girls over hah so now we have to come up with a place to chill AND MAKE OUT. yeahhhhuhhh its been to long. Rawr.but to bad im not horny maybe I will be tomorrow? God only knows. Josh better hope so atleast Im done maybe when something exciting happens i'll write a new entry thing

I'm listening to Chris Brown. Not suprising lately. I'm addicted to this one song. Its hella good. So i got my phone bill Tuesday 581.00 Let me tell you my parentals weren't happy. At all. I have to work to ear the money. 3,893 text messages will do that to your phone bill though = My friend wants to do ectasy. And I wanna do it to. AND FUCK SOMEONE. That would be tight to lose your virginity to someone on ectasy. Cause it would feel so good. Cause how horny you get you know? Well i decided i'm going to. Then me and another friend [shes remaining annonymous until I that she doesn't care if I say her name] are doing shrooms for sure. When I get money. && then i wanna do acid. I feel so bad. Like not badass. But like, not good. You get it. Right? Well idkkk. Then yesterday. I got on AIM and no one was really on. So I went to go lay down. And that was about 4:30. Then i guess two boys come over to see me [Josh and Andy] Ps. This is the story I was told They came over and my grandpa answered it and let them in you know like he usually does when boys come over. And he comes upstairs and was like "two boys are downstairs for you" and I guess I told him to tell them I 'fell off the face of the earth' Lol. And so he told them that I was asleep and he couldn't wake me up. But I guess it was so loud they could hear me say that. And thought I was awake, When really i wasn't mentally awake, And I don't remember ANY of this. So this boy right. Named Josh. I used to like him. Alot. Then I finally find out he "doesn't like me" and so I got over him. Cause thats what i do when boys don't like me. Well I find out that he likes me. Know what i'm gonna say when he asks me out "You had your fucking chance. Its to late i'm over you now" Yeah right. I only wish I could say that. But I think i'm gonna say no Cause i'm just gay like that [not literally] But like he only wants sex. Even though hes a virgin. But like he's always saying "we should fuck" And I guess yesterday he came over because "he was so horny his balls were gonna fall off" Those were his exact words. Yeah idk. What should I do?