g
love
makes
me
smile
.
.
.
alot
.
everythings great
and im
wondering
when
somethings going to
GIVE.
the sky
is lighting up
so bright
right now.
the rain
is coming down
loud
on the rooftop.
four hours seem like days
before he will be home.
i know the triggers.
i pull them.
its habitual.
superior.
elite.
get over it.
k?
im officially more unhappy than i can ever remember being.
i hate _ _ _ _.
i
n
s
e
r
t
f
i
t
t
i
n
g
w
o
r
d
s
n
o
w
.
we can take a trip to the hood and back.
i want to go back to california badly.
milk crates are the new shelves. very industrial looking. i may have a talented bone in this body yet!
am i pregnant yet or what?
i need to decorate. badly.
im here. im happy. i love him.
im not pregnant.
... if i was i wouldnt be going to colorado. thats for sure.
im sick.
my cat attacked my hand and now its infected and swollen.
im depressed.
i might be pregnant.
and to top it off, when i went to see him... he practically ignored me.
i stood there for 20 minutes as he talked steadily with meg about nonsense... but he didnt say one word to me.
and then tonight he asks... "do you think we should hook up before you leave or just keep it friends?"
to that i responded "i dont know... i honestly wish i knew the answer to that....."
wtf is with me and always screwing my life up.
fuck fuck fuck!
"nevermind then... i was flattered because you miss me.. plus half yearly is starting up and i have 2 days off this whole month"
"leaving you scares the hell out of my and the closer i get to moving the more sad it makes me."
...and none of this means anything.
fuck.