i've been really upset lately. to be honest i cant even put my finger on exactly what it is. but it's this pain that wont leave. i just keep building things up inside me. and it all just attacks me inside. i never feel good enough for anyone. i never know who i can trust. it's not that i'm always sad. because i have been my happiest i've ever been in a long time when i am with him. but then i get myself thinking. i just dont want to get hurt again im constantly hold these tears inside me. i need my mom. i need my dad. but neither of them are really there. to be honest, i'd rather be fighting with them like we used to because it showed me they cared. now they just dont talk to me. i feel like such a crappy person. i do this to myself. i go searching for ways to hurt myself. reading things. looking at pictures. and i feel like i cant compair. i'm just cambria. i want to feel like im important. i get told the same things she did. she seems like so much more fun. what do i have to offer? what do people even see in me? im a nobody. and i just care too much. too much about people. i love so easily. i feel so weak. and im scared people are going to see that and take advantage of it. i dont know what to do about all this. it's stabbing me though. how do i get rid of it all.