HAPPY THANKSGIVING

so how is everyone today im really bored. but i really should be doing my homework ohh well dont care so how is everything with everyone. not much up over here just the ceiling untill it falls on chrissy head luv ya chrissy well i guess i bored u guys anough i will go do my homework now see ya all on the flip side ~ME~

Because of You - Kelly Clarkson I will not make the same mistakes that you did I will not let myself Cause my heart so much misery I will not break the way you did, You fell so hard I've learned the hard way To never let it get that far Because of you I never stray too far from the sidewalk Because of you I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt Because of you I find it hard to trust not only me, but everyone around me Because of you I am afraid I lose my way And it's not too long before you point it out I cannot cry Because you know that's weakness in your eyes I'm forced to fake A smile, a laugh everyday of my life My heart can't possibly break When it wasn't even whole to start with Because of you I never stray too far from the sidewalk Because of you I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt Because of you I find it hard to trust not only me, but everyone around me Because of you I am afraid I watched you die I heard you cry every night in your sleep I was so young You should have known better than to lean on me You never thought of anyone else You just saw your pain And now I cry in the middle of the night For the same damn thing Because of you I never stray too far from the sidewalk Because of you I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt Because of you I tried my hardest just to forget everything Because of you I don't know how to let anyone else in Because of you I'm ashamed of my life because it's empty Because of you I am afraid Because of you Because of you

wow it has been a long time sence i wrote in this ohhh well no one reads it anyway. so ya nothing new going on just baby sitting. oh yea me and chrissy went to see saw 2 it was so awsome it is a must see. well kayla goes fo her licence monday i hope she gets it i know she will do fine well anyway got to go talk to u later ~ME~

yeah...umm...so... i dont know wat to say to anyone. but i have this really wired feeling that some thing is going to happen or has happened. i hate this feeling it is almost an annoyed feeling, a confused feeling mixed emotions. well anyway just let everyone know that past is the past and their is nothing u can do to change it, all u can do is live in the present. but answer the ? fo me u are people so worked up on the past. everyone just needs to let it go. so if it seems im telling people wat to do. ohh well. well anyway i guess i will leave now so people do get mad at me. leave a comment or two see ya all on the flip side ~ME~

their is not ? that teenage years are filled with drama. on the other hand there is also no doubt that making the decision to drop at lest so of the drama can equate to a much happier and more peaceful life. we often allow ourselves to get all worked up and bothered about things that on a second look are not really that big a deal after all. a friend fo example might make a mistake or say something wrong. rather than forget about it and get on with our day we allow ourselves to feel offended and annoyed. we think about the mistake during the rest of the day, feeling more and more justified in our irritation. many of us might even go home and tell others about it or call a friend to commiserate rather than simply letting it go. the problem with sweating the small stuff is that there is and always will be an endless supply of things to sweat over. there always will be friends making mistakes, strangers cutting us off, thing being lost, plans going astray, and all the rest. pretty soon we are sweating everything and life seems to be one drama right after amother. as u learn to let some or these things go i will find urself experiencing far less stress and aggravation. u will be left with more mental energy and creativity in order to live life to its fullest. this goes to everyone and i mean evenyone if u are reading this and u are thinking of a situation that has to do with other people just dont for get u are gulty of it to.

While there are exception, the same applies to mant instances where our response is "i know." Many times we really dont "know," we are just saying that we do or assuning that we do. often out I-know response is offered before the person talking to us is even finished with what they have to say. when you automatically respond to someone by saying "i know" wat you are really saying is "im not listening to you. it is as if u stop listening b/c you think u already know all there is to know about something of u simply dont want to know about somthing or are unwilling to take the time to listen. this response prevents u from hearing things that may be important and drives a deep wedge between urself and the person ur talking to. b/c ur listening better, the people who talk to u will sence u improved listening skills and will begin to relax around u. their lack of tension will in turn make it easier fo u to be around them. as always good listening skills feed good communication and enhance the quality of ur relationships.

this is something i got from a book i have i want u to plz read it i thought it was relivent to the issuse that is going one now DONT THROW UP ON YOUR FRIENDS it is interesting to consider waht many of us are tempted to do when we have the emotional equivalent of the stomach flu when we lose our bearings fall into a really low mood and lose it emotionally. rather then keep our distance some of us attack the peopl we know with our woes. we share evey thought insecurity and negative idea that happens to be in our minds. sam would fall into a horrible mood. he would have wat he calls a "world class thought attack". during this time his thoughts become negative insecure and pessimistic. he would imagine that his friends were agauinst him that his parents did not love him and that he was doomed to a life of failure. (who has not felt that way) he became angry defensive and attacking. he would push people away. it was as if he were throwing up on his friends and others. in a low state of mind everything seems really bad and worse than it probably is.he would hate the world one day and the next thing would be fine. treat this low mood as if it were a temporary case of the "emotional flu". it became obvious to him that every though he felt like eveyone hated him and that his world was falling apart it seemed that way only because of his mood was so bad. it is better to wait it out and confront people when felling better rather then when he was at his worst. in most cases there was nothing to confront or be concerned about. instead of pushing people away and creating problems, realize wat is goin on. make peace with the fact that while everyone has lkow moods that does not mean to act on them or even give them so much significance. it is okay to ask for help or support and share with people when feeling bad if that seems necessary. i hope this helps!! ~ME~

it has been for ever, that i have made a new entry so im going to do it now nothing else to do. yeah we just got back from nat's and chrissy got her hair died it looks so good. nat is good at that kind of stuff. well anyway, dad finally let me drive me and chrissy to moms but he didnot let me drive the jeep it is the truck that thing is awsome to drive well anyway not more to take about ohh yeah nick lost his game today oh well u win some and u lose some not much u can do about that well any way got to go check my mail this is got to be alot of mail in their i have not checked for ever. luv ya fo ever and fo always ~ME~

today was the worse day ever i mean it was bad first i could not find the reg. fo the car to get a parking spot at the high school and then i locked the keys in the car and had to call nana to get a spare key and then after school i unlocked the doors and found the reg. and went in side the school to get a parking spot but they are all out i was so pissed b/c i was a now aloud to park at the high school and their was no spots left and i just though it was so unfair and when i when back to my car to go get nick the car would not start the just keep getting worse and i had to wake over to the middle school to get nick and sigh him out then wake over to the high school and wait fo someone to pick me and nick up and we came home and i did me homework but it was the worse day ever that is not the hole story but it is the outline of it. well have to go to bed and get ready fo another bad day tomarrow oh well this year is going to suck so bad night night ~ME~

today me and chrissy got ur hair cut and i got mine died it is a different color it is more of a copper color now everyone says it looks good and i like the color. yea...umm...ok...bored...after that we went to the gym and them came how and cleaned my room how fun. yea in the morring i have to take nick to school so i have to get up at 6:oo am and it is my lasted day of vacation bummer i dont want to go back to school it is always so stressful and depresing oh well we got to do wat we got to do even if it means we dont have to well got to go to bed have to get up early night night kiss kiss ~ME~

we their is not much going on today 3 days left of summer and i really do not want to go back to that school. well i got my interner back it was out fo like 5 hours ohh well i lived and like chrissy said an asshole dericting traffic said we couldn't go passed and we live here i was about to say well then how else are we sposed to get to our house fly or do u want to build anogher drive way fo us. dad told him off though it was cool well im bored as hell but im still not that bored to go back to school. oh yeah wednesday i have to move me and chrissy's hair appontment to eather ealyer or later b/c it was at 2 but i have to pick nick up from school i have to talk to nana tonight well see ya all ~ME~

well me and chrissy just got back from nick's football game they one 20-0 noble suxs it was such a good game it was awsome i also so people from our high school which was werried ohh well. mom says me and chrissy can go shopping tomarrow well we will see i know i can not take her word i know that from to day and all the other times she has lied to me. im glad kayla is going to get her licence that will be awsome yeah last tuesday i was sposed to go get the car registerted fo it to be able to park at the high school but my dad did not tell me untill 3 days after i was sposed to go. i was so happy that he told me about that (im being sarcastic) well goes to show i dont know wat im going to do about parking at the high school. school has not even started yet and im already stressed out. with the hole do i have to sigh nick out if so he has to wat fo me and then dad says i cant bring nick to school early but i have to be their before nick starts and i dont know wat that hell is going on sorry if this is so confusing i can understand it eather ohh well i guess this is going to be another stressed filled year. and then also this year u have to send out applications to collages that is going to be hard aswell. i have no idea wat im going to do ohh well that is my problem not yours see ya ~ME~

yeah me and chrissy were sposed to go shopping today but mom did not leave us any money or a car to drive and now she is saying that she has to work when yesterday she said she didnt have to work i guess now i cant ever trust peoples word fo things. wat that hell is going on everything is falling a part around me. well have to go be bored and then wait untill nicks football game to go sum where and i will probably be bored their too ohh well at lessed chrissy will be their ~ME~

another poem i wrote in like 3 mins i know this one is not good eather but ohh well Things have fallen a part left alone with a broken heart I don’t know what to do Things are broken Not as they should be This cant be the way I don’t know what words I should say People I once trusted are gone Turned their backs to me I try to hard to make things right I give advise And they never use it So what is the point Why cant thing be alright Why are things the way they are Why cant I change them No matter how hard I try I just want things to be better But know they never will So why do I try so hard to do the things I do I know I can not change things The world I know has crumbled No long the ones innocent place it was when we were younger Why cant thing go back to that Not a worry in the world I guess it goes to show That no matter how hard u try things will never change So why try

a poem i wrote just now in one min it does not rhyme and it problay is not that good oh well dont care deal with it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I wish all the pain would go away People say life is what u make it Well I guess I made life worse then it probably is I have give up so don’t come to me with your problems I wish I could help and I will lesson But no matter how hard I try nothing seems to go right so I have given up I am not even going to try No one lessons to me with the advise I have to say So I refuse to give anymore I just wish their was a way to make it all stop But I have come to find that it wont not un till the day I die It is a curse that has been brought a pone me in which I have to bare U don’t know how much I wish that I could make every ones problems just vanish There is only so much I can give And I have tried so hard to make everyone happy But that is one thing I can no longer do So just remember this poem is not about u

people piss me off i really dont know why they just do i cant take life anymore no matter wat i say or do never seems to help sometime it makes thing worse i dont know some times i wish i could get side of people's heads and figure out wat drives them to do the things they say and do well that wont happen so i guess im stuck guessing oh well dont give a fuck anymore see ya all ~ME~

today i had to go to gorham to deposit a check for dad that was fun it gave me something to do. and on the way back to the house at the light by sam's club me and nick almost got into an acident again it was so scarry well my light turned green and of course i went and this other guy was flying by and of coures that means that he ran a red light and he was going like 60 or 65 mpr and the only reason i slamed on my brake is b/c nick steped on the floor really hard pertending that he had a brake and he a so made a grunting sound if i had go a sec earlyer and he hit me i would have died b/c it he would have hit me on my side of the car and nick would have been injered really bad i can till u that was the worse thing to happen to me i was shaking so bad i still am my heart stoped and u imagen i almost died it makes u think and i know that is not going to be the last time it will happen to me i called nana after it happened and she said did u get the licence plate and i say i was almost in another accident and it scarred the shit out of me that was the last thing that was on my mind. i would be able to live with my self if anything happened to nick or anyone even if this time it would not have been my falt but it was the worse feeling ever and after that day i hit that gurl i thought that would never happen agian guess wat i was wrong i dont want to go though this again it is so hard to get over and if he hit me i would not have been here, at that speed he was going anything could happen well that is anough talk about that im going to mom's around 5 so i should be their at six i wonder if chrissy had one of those feelings again. luv ya fo ever and fo always ~ME~

my results to the quizzes i took wat color are u??? Your Results: Gray Your color is gray... You are neutral... neither here nor there... not settled, not understood, unpredictable, plain, somewhat boring, ordinary.... Not lively in any way.... Never happy, never sad, mad or anything! How blond are you? created by Belle -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Your Results: Red Head The saying might be blonds have all the fun but i bet your a blast to hang out with, your the type that lives life to the fullest and would never miss a good party. Anuff said!!! What sex dessert are you? *PICS* created by SexyBitch69 -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Your Results: chocolate sauce you like it on top...u like is sweet, but rough...you kinky SON OF A BITCH BASTARD! What kind of eyes do you have? (with pictures) created by TimesRChngn06 -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Your Results: Eden You have eden eyes. Eden is the color of water. Your eyes symbolize your great flexibility. You are a creative person. You can think of many good ways to get your point across to people as you have very good communication abilities. When someone feels down or is hurt, you have the remarkable ability to help them and heal them. If you have too little going on in your life, you may be withdrawn and depressed, timid, manipulative, unreliable, stubborn, or suspicious. Some words to describe you: peaceful, sincere, affectionate, tranquil, intuitive, trustworthy, pure, loyal, healing, and stable. Whats your "true theme song" ~PICTURES~ created by XxsadeyedangelxX -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Your Results: Pretty girl By;Sugarcult If you get told all the time your beautiful but you don't believe it. You can never find that one special person that you've been looking for...but your a pretty girl right? It does'nt make sense to you...if your beautiful but you always seems like theres no guys who like you...to you love is an excuse to get hurt...and don't worry your just like me. What Angel Are You? created by WhiteWitch -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Your Results: Sky Angel You are the Sky Angel.You are calm, peaceful and serene.It can take an eternity to make you angry, but you can be very distructive on a whim.You can be slow to make friends, but you will stick by somone through thick and thin, and won't betray them, like the night.You like blues and whites, pastely colours.You are also atracted to birds, as they share your domain.

today i went to jess's birthday party and it was so much fun and it was really good to see her again that is the first time in the hole summer i have seen her. well anyway dad has not called yet so i dont know if i have to bring nick to football most likly i will but it is no big deal at lest i well get to see kayla their... it is not like i have not see her fo the past 2 days i like seeing kay she makes my day...and this time i want be alone talking to kayla's dad lol. well im bored as always nothing new their........yeah...umm...ok...i cant figure out wat else to write. nick just called dad and i dont have to bring him to football now i have to tell kayla that im not going. well have to go talk to kay luv ya fo ever and fo always see ya all on the flip side ~ME~