Hey, I havent wrote a entry in awhile. I have been going on myspace ever since my friends have and a friend made one for me and begged me to go on...so i am here on and off but if you guys want to see my myspace than look me up in serach and out my name in as "Raven Armstrong" and I have two but the first one doesnt work so it is the second one and it probably hasa picture of a drawling and that one is the one i use!!! Look at it and tell me what you think about it! With love, Raven

Raven, I know you told me to avoid your past diary entries. But something about them caused me to worry. I felt the dredded feeling in the pit of my stomache...the feeling that I hate so much. I read your entry for when we spoke on the phone for 8 hours and how you wished it was Charles instead. And naturally, I felt hurt. As if everything I had said and done at that point of our relationship meant nothing. The point is, Raven, I don't want you to hide things from me. Including feelings. I understand Charles broke your heart...you two were together for a year and nine months. But there's nothing I can do about that. The only thing I am capable of doing is being there for you, making you happy, and showing the love you deserve. I am your boyfriend. And now, I don't know what it is that you are missing or what it is that I could better help. Raven, you are the one girl I've ever felt the strongest for. I can honestly say that I love you. You brighten my day when I hear your voice and you make me feel like a better person. I hope, I really hope I can make you feel the same. And I know you've said otherwise, you've expressed your feelings to me several times, but such diary entries as the ones I read make me question things. I do not want to question the things I've said or done. I don't want you to either. I want to be someone you can love, lean on, and talk about everything with. And alot of that has been proven, but at this point...I'm somewhat confused. I understand you were confused alot. Especially over the relationship with Charles. But I hope you do not have mixed feelings about me and you. That what we've done together, what we said to one another....meant nothing. Cause everything I've said and done with you holds a very special place in my heart. A hole you helped fill. You know me better than anyone....and I do not want to give up. I don't want to give up on the love we have for one another. I do not want to be your boyfriend for the sole reason of getting back at someone. You've said that our relationship wasn't that, but until you can tell me everything...I'll try to believe. I'll try to believe that I actually matter. Raven, I love you. And noone will take that love away from me. Yours, Wade P.S. I may be overreacting. I could be. Especially with what has happened recently. The feelings, the emotions, I hope everything we've done has been worth it. Atleast, I think so.

hey Well summer has been ook but werid and confusing the most. Well of me and charles are no more and i am kinda mad at him but i wont say it on her really without his permission but lets just say he left me in confusion and told a friend a totally differnt story so i look like an idoit and boy i am pissed. But me and wade are doing great..i woundnt be able to get through some of these things without him..he is very loving..always fills me in and he cares..i am very proud of him and what he does...he writing a book and and he is doing some illustrations for a book and they look really good. this message is to charles:IFYOU THOUGHT THAT THERE WASNT ANY GUY BETTER THAN YOU WELL YOU ARE 11O% WRONG.IF PROMISE HE WONT PuSH ME OUT AND AT LEAST WHEN HE PROMISE TO BE THERE THROUGH THICK AND THIN AND EVERYTHING WILL BE OK...AT LEAST HE CAN KEEP THAT PROMISE. and it seems that if i can move on to a diifernt live than i can move without chalres cause it seems that he is doing the same thing..he doesnt care..he doesnt love me cause in love...you dont do that. Raven

This is Wade, again. And it will most likely be my last posting here as this is Raven's diary and I never meant to take it over. But she doesn't mind that I post here...she even encouraged me to. But my last entry..."Dear Raven"...was just a confusing mess of words on my part. I read her earlier entries and felt confused and scared. As if I was reading a different side of Raven. But she got back from Orlando on Friday and she called around noon where we assured one another of our feelings, thoughts, and our wants the entire day. And me and her were definetly on the same level. When we spoke...she practically kept me at attention listening to how she felt about me and it warmed every part of my heart. And in every way was she convincing...as she always is. But as you could see from my last entry...I'm somewhat paranoid of deceit. And it's something I'd never have a heart to do. Especially with family matters of mine in the past. And so, my feelings for Raven were fighting the bad images and the thoughts that arose from those entries but were surely taken away when me and Raven spoke. So, everything between me and Raven are completely fine. Me and her are in the type of relationship where we can talk about anything and are not afraid to display or share our affections or feelings for one another. She's the kind of girl I had been looking for...but she was directly under my nose. Always there...always in the back of my mind. I can surely see myself having a future with her. My feelings are that deep and promising and in no way would I give her up. Raven is the one girl I've ever felt the strongest for...and being that guy for her is one of the most wonderful feelings I've felt. I love you Raven. And now, to Jessica, I understand you designed her diary here somewhat and apologize if I changed a few of the images around. The ones that are on here now are of me and her during the 4th of July weekend when she was here at the beach. It's my favorite shot of Raven...but you don't see me too well. But the meaning of the photo is the best thing about it. And Charles, whether you have feelings left for Raven or not, I can assure you that I will never hurt her and neither do I have any intentions of doing so. And that is not a throw at you at all. I just want her friends to know that I am a legit guy. It's a promise I know I can keep. And Raven, as you read this, thank you. Thanks for being the most caring girl in my life. If there were any holes in my heart...you have helped fill them in. And I will talk to you soon, lovergirl. Love, ~Wade P.S. I thought I'd add that me and Raven met during a game of sandlot football. She was my next door neighbor and it was about 5 years ago when I was quarterback and she was receiver that we began to know each other. And after 3 years of being separated, breaking up then due to the two of us moving, we've learned, matured, and grown into a new relationship. And it's all been worth it.

school startd...bored..gotta do homework...bored..sleepy...pissed...havent wrote in awhile and i dont know what to write..lol...any interesting comments. Raven

i saw the movie and omg...i did love it...it was good...saw it with wade,scott, shannon with her two sisters and her mom...it was cool....i am still bored.....but if anybody saw the movie...tell me what you thought. Raven

I am in computer class really bored and needing somethng to do...lol....help....i hardly get any comments anymore...(cries*) I need something to do. Any suggestions? LOVE YOU WADE!!!! Raven

sorry i havent been online for a while..my dad has though but hi.. There is this guy name Wade right? You can say he is my chilhood boyfriend. We havent talked in 3 years til now. He says he still likes me and cares for me and that his feelings have never died out for me and even more stuff but the thing is i am with charles...why do i have to be in the siutations..omg..it sucks..he keeps on getting me these sweet e-mails and calls me all the time to make sure everthing is ok..i mean he calls more than charles does put togther..i had to choose between them so who do you think but wade says he will always be there when i need him. Raven

i am not grounded anymore yea.i got grounded cause i called charles..guys have to call me or at least boyfriend but he forgets me half the time they are so old fashion it drives me nuts but i also got grounded cause i didnt fill up the frige with soda and next time will be a month without soda then a year so ....it is stupis dont you think...werid rules! raven

well cant you tell that i was bored..i didnt know what to write but spring break is over and it was boring mostly...easter was ok i guess..nothing new..all about jesus..me and charles are doing ok though people are bothering me so bad that we dont act like a couple..do i believe it.....sometimes..i can say..have i got tired of the relationship....with all this people...yeah sometimes it gets to me..i think he derseves so much better no matter what he says. i am scared to go in high school with charles..i am scared of the things coming to us..i dont know what to do..all i know is going to get worse but i dont want to give him up cause i will suffer without him i love him so much it hurts..help me.

my spring break is getting better....i went to charles house and it was really relaxing and i wish i didnt have to leave. we snuggled and i took a five min nap we kissed or whatever and was being playful in a nice way.....it was relaxing and he rubs my back and it just......sighs....mealts inside...................dreamy............away..............................................................................

gosh ...FCAT sucks and we have to do it monday and it is going to suck and finally it will be over and today i was going to go to charles house but my baby sis got sick and i had to stay home to take care of her and i didnt want to get anyone else sick so i am bored. my mom said i can go next week my mom still doesnt trust charles dad so he better get someone else for a ride or i cant come which sucks...she doesnt mind jamie his brother or anybody else but not his dad..it is annoying. my cousin micheal got in a car crash and got really hurt with broken bones and stuff and he was going to be here soon but now i dont know when....matti thing ....well i guess it is going ok..i talked to him not long ago and me and charles are doing ok. raven sorry gor any mispelled words

hi everyone you like my new diary thanks to my friends matti and steph but i am not doing so well.charles was talking to matti and he thinks he is gay and saying all the stuff and i got hurt and pissed. it is just i hate the feeling that he is hiding something from me and people are always putting things in my mind and i cant take it anymore and i dont want to anymore i thought we were stronger than this but i dont know what to do and i got no sleep last night instead i cried myself to sleep..i dont know what to do...i am stuck and i dont want to....i am pissed at both charles and matti..i am not talking to them...til...something happens i dont know....but i am sick and tired of being in the middle and wondering who is telling the truth. love always raven

hi everyone i am bored over my friends house doing good but i am over steph better being at home listeing to my parents argue and being bored have to death.charles and i are doing ok i guess and idont know what to write but hi.....bye.

you make me wanna la la on the kitchen on the floor i ll be a french maid where ill meet you at the door ill be an alley cat drink up milk up i want more you make me wanna scream isnt that a slut song or what ...well i am bored and the song is stuck in my head cause of charles......well i am a dorl o well bye raven

hi everyone i am not having a good day....my ex was going to come over but is pissed off at me cause he figured out that charles my boyfriend knows that my ex still has feelings for me so he didnt come and then charles was going to come but chelsea has other plans so he didnt come...chelsea is a girl who i dont know as a friend i guess but i always and always will have jealous issues with her cause people always tell me that i need to watch them two both cause they always flurt with each other and inside and i still kinda have those feelings and they wont go away so i feel lonely and bored mostly all the time and now i am not allowed to make any plans with chalres cause it is to complicated and he is probably going to break up with me but right now at this moment i dont care cause i am too pised and i cant control what my parents say. raven

hello how is everybody......my b-day was really fun ...i finally turned 15 years old and older than charles again....we played, laughed a little we played truth or dare....got wet..i felt sorry for matti (which i finally meet and he is very cool) cause all the girls cause they thought he was cute and my freind thought he was hot.......he is not bad ....we played spin the hairspray cause i didnt have a bottle and i had tp make out with some people and my boyfriend had to kiss matti... not once but twice i saw the first i saw the first one but couldnt stand the second time....too much for me.....but i had fun...made out with people see my boyfriend kiss a guy and a girl for the first time and that image will never get out of my mind love always, raven

hello sorry i havent been on for a whilr but i am not in a good mood...my dad is pissing me ...he is getting old and losing his hearing and saying a lot of things that i didnt even say. my b-day is tommorrow and i am hoping my b/f will remeber....probably not......i need some cheering up. always raven

hello, raven here. wanting to thank charles for making the diary...nice job...hope you guys have a good new years and charles ..i love you.

Omg my brother is so getting on my nerves...he seriously has an anger problem..i really worry for him, it scares my the way he acts, like he is always cusing at me and mom, and hitting me..im 14, and he's 12..yet he acts 3...grrr i just want to strangle his ass soooo bad.... Well how is everyone :) ....*pouting*