so. this year has arrived. and im hopeful for new, fresh and exciting things to happen. not that my life is a bundle of excitement..and that's exactly my point. Lol. im 19. Im graduating this year. Finafuckinglly . I have no boyfriend, and ive decided thatim no more than friend material. Although.. I have this friend with benefits. I feel sorta bad, he's kinda really into me. I love him dearly, but i made it clear i dont want to be in a relationship. Clear. I'm into the wrong guy. He is much older than me and it's driving me mental (taken from the movie "it takes two' which i recently watched with my good friend Emily) . it's a pyscho-logical thing.. I need to take on the challenge of being able to capture the attention of a successulf (and sexy as hell-or at least according to me- )individual who wouldnt otherwise even look at me. Needless to say, im a big fail. I have no Game, as Sarah would say. One day he told me i was cute, but apparently i took it the wrong way (conclusion drawn by me), it did mean nothing. I will see him again tomorrow, and although i dont want to admit it to myself, im anxiously waiting to be in that moment where my stomach feels a little weird, where we unintentionally cross stares and pretend that we dont want to make out with each other. It's not that he is not into me, per se, it's just the situation. It is wrong by all means, and i can see that, i understand it.. and i still want him.