i hate everything. i haven't cried this much in so long. honestly, this whole weekend has been jam backed with tears. i wish i had someone to talk to. i don't. i haven't had anyone for a long time. i'm so fucking alone. so, i got a job interview on wednesday, which looks promising. but, i don't know. i feel like absolute shit. honestly. i could go into details, but i'll just start crying again. i want to move to edmonton now. i want to leave. i don't want to cry about the people here anymore. i don't want them to hurt me anymore. i wish i could change so many things. this sucks. my ocd and anxieties are at an all time high, and i have no one. i can't sleep. i can't do anything. and i'm sick of prozac. i can't be on drugs my whole life. so why bother. this morning, i fell down in the middle of the fucking road and now my knee kills. don't ask me what i was doing there. then i sat on the side walk and cried. at like, 6 in the morning. and i planned to kill myself. i was going to set it all out. i was so fucking sad. i act as if i don't cut myself because i learned no to. i act like it's because i'm strong enough not to, but that's a fucking lie. and i'm not really sure who i'm lying too about it. i hope no one reads this. everything is hopeless. and i am so alone