I Miss him sooo much right now! Okay so my weekend started Wenesday and oh did it start. Wednesday night I went to Cody's with Jake, Will, Caitlin, Dru, Noah, Aaron and some people. So we drank and I got pretty damn drunk. So will is trashed and his pants wont stay up haha it was hilarious. Then they make up their minds they want to go to the Big Stop. So we pile in the car and the only sober one, Noah drives us to the Big Stop. Oh my god, as I was ordering I pulled all the shit off the table onto the floor and I was still trying to order ahah it was soo bad but funny. And then I ordered cake and I had it all over me and all over the table and floor and everywhere else you can imagine. not to mention I saw this girl named Jackie who I work with there as I was sucking the icing off my spoon it was not good. then the bill was like $50 and will paid for all of us haha sucker. Then Noah took me home and Aaron pretty much called me an idiot. Then the nest morning I get up, go to work, get my hair cut and then go to the university with Ryan to find his date. So when we do find his date I get a call from Kevan asking me to come over to chill, so I ditch ryan for Kevan and Harv, and oh how I love Harv! Anyway so I went to Kevan's and he told me about his new girlfriend and the kid is funny as fack and I love it so that was fun. Then Ryan came over and all four of us went to the big stop at like 1 to have breakfast. It was pretty damn sweet. Then yesterday I slept in and then packed and got ready to go to PEI. Mike picked me up and me Denise, Melinda and Mike headed to go see Ashley for her Birthday. When we got there we went to this shitty ass restaurant but it was still fun and Ashley knew like eevryone. Then we met her roomate and a friend of his that was such a sweet guy that i really wish I had got to know better. Anyway so we are chilling and then this 40 year old guy they go to school with shows up with like weed and stuff and it was just really funny. He kept telling me he had kids my age. So Ashley said we were leaving to go meet some of her friends soon so Im like well Ill drink 3 of my things and then take the last one for the walk. So in a matter of 20 minutes I chugged not only 3, not four but 5 REVs... Oh my god... soo drunk. I ran to the bathroom because I was sure I was going to throw up. Ashleys friend Treze was there and chris and jamie and Zuchini and some other peeps and I was freaking crazy. Then we left to go to the Motel and thats where things get fuzzy. I remmeber meeting a lot of people, Kyla and Julie and like a bunch of people I was left alone there for a good while. Then I some how got to Jacks and got pizza and then I got chinese food and then took it back to Ashleys and then I got to sit with Jake :). And he had his arm around me and then some how I ended up with someone else and I have no idea how it happened but it really sucked cause I really like him. Haha so I end up with this guy then Im like wtf so Treze was helping me get him off me, it was pretty damn funny. And then everone left and everyone else went to bed (at this point it was like 4) but I was like What? The party's not over yet so I went over to the motel and hung out with a bunch of people and had this guy keep givin me booze.. yeah he was working me. Then Blair walked back so I tagged along and passed out. This morning I woke up to find Melinda had lost her wallet. All in all the night was effed up but fun shit. Then today I sat around and did shit all... except miss a guy I barely talked to. I dont like anyone in highschool anymore. Like the guys are so ridiculous and hit on girls in grade nine its just stupid, like university guys are fucking sweet haha, I cant wait until next year! Speaking of which Jacob starting telling me that I was jealous when I saw him with this girl and that he knew I wanted him... ahahha the biggest bs I ever heard. So now he is all like, you know what? Im not with her so will you make some time for me?... like all this stuff, saying how I looked really good at the dance blah blah blah. He's liked me before but I told him that I didnt fell the same way and he was a bitch to me for so long after that. he put mayonase in my drink.. and I drank it. So I think Im going to use this to get back at him, cause he annoys the shit out of me. tonight im out with denise mike and ryan, should be crazy. Em

Sooo long time no update. High Lights of summer: -yearbook camp -getting trashed before yeabook camp, peter trying to talk me into a threesome and then throwing all my clothes I had packed for yearbook camp out. -Britts party with justin in a tent, then falling asleep to wake up to quite the surprise. Ahh last weekend I went out wiht melissa ane meghan to a party with all the grads that came back and it was fun. But im too lazy to write about that. Im grumpy and righ tnow I dont really like well anyone. Life Blows So I dont understand why people have to be stupid and (girly word) incensitive. So Meghan pisses me off because she treats people like shit and then write on her lj how she doesnt have a good home life and doesnt get attention and then she made out with Peter at the party and fuck I said Id stop saying shit about her but she pisses me off. Im going to hell. Ryan is annoying the fuck out of me. He's cool for like two seconds but then he doesnt realize when he's taking things to far. he keeps making this joke that Ive told him to fuck off about and that it actually makes me mad when he says it and he contnues to go on about it. Caitlin, god, movie movie movie, everything we talk about is about this movie we are making and she just doesnt shut up and does all this crap thats not necessary and its annoying as hell! Jacob, he watches everything I eat and is all like "Oh look shes eating." and he put mayo in my drink and I drank it and hes always going on about how im a skank or something and fuck he claims not to remember when we made out last year when it was mostly him (eww). And he's just as damn skinny as I am so I dont know what the fuck he cares about what I eat... hes an idiot and I really hate him. Brandon, is a little gay bitch who thinks he is the shit. I dont even know if he's joking when he says shit to me. But I really hate him too. Kayla! what an idiot.. holy shit all day shes like not talking to me so im like whatever and I get home and she sends me this bullshit on msn saying I got her whole family in this big ass fight. And im all like what the fuck are you talking about you crazy bitch?... she had her story all wrong and had been just fucking with me all day, well tomorrow im not even talking to her because she's an idiot... and mean to her parents and a fuck head. thats right fuck head. Marc, took me out of his top 8 on myspace.... bitch! Another way to bring me down. Haha Melanie, one minute shes nice the next she crazy, and all she does is go on about how no one loves her, and Id set her up if she'd shut up for half a second. Emma, expects too much from boys.. i dont blame her and am not mad at her in the least, i need to set her up too. I hope she gets happy. Braedon, I hate braedon, hes mean, stupid and all he ever does is talk about video games. He's just such a retard who cares about no one. Matt, smelt horrible today! This sounds so stupid.. but I just cant take these people anymore. Like the people I just named are some of my best friends. Plus I have a million things to do tonight.. and its just stupiddd I swear im not a mean person ha just had to get that out. Fuck them Em. .... much better

OHH Holy Shit... what a couple of weeks it has been. Okay so starting with Mike and Denise's going away party. So I got off work and Denises Friend Mark picked me up and drove me to the pringle street woods. So I waited there with Mike for Mark to go get Caitlin and we dissed meghan and it felt damn good cause she was being so mean that day. Anyway so caitlin gets there and me her mike go and meet: Andrea Nick and Ryan. So we go into the woods and realise we don't have any matches so Nick and Andrea leave and go get some and I drink half a canada cooler... By the time they got back I was soo drunk it wasnt even cool. So Mike tells me and Ryan to walk up and get Denise and Mark so we do and then we decide that just to make meghan mad we are going to smoke in front of her. So we get it ready but the Duncan and Kevan come out so we smoke out there and go in and come to find out Denise told her the next day so I dont even care. So Meghan and Melinda and Ashley are all in there and we are running around crazy and then I see a light coming and Im like sweet! more people coming to party... turns out it was the cops... Just one and she was nice we put out the fire and then she let us go and said that if it had been the other cop then we would have gotten arrested for a liquor charge. So anyway Meghan, Nick and Andrea take off and me and Mike and all them walk to Mikes. There we see Erin driving with Jamie and Brittany! I was so excited, so we went to mikes and then Kevan, Dave and Duncan show up! Oh my god make my night. Then to top things off we go outside and DYLAN AND AARON... dylan just back from Africa so it was sweet. Then later mikes dad kicks us out of the house and so we go to the waterfowl park where Denise saves one thing for only me and her and we had some good chatting times. So we have a huge group hug and then later they live for england. I miss them sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much omg soo much. We like lived together anyway. The next day I go to grand manan.. lame ass shit. Then I get back and find out that at the summer party everyone got me a nintendo DS and they totally rocked my socks cause it is soooo kick ass. So then the other night me and Ryan went to Steve and Louis' to party! So I get drunk... really really fast. Then grade 8 hoes Tia and Anita came and chilled, then Ethan came and Jen and god looking for stuff. But later that night Jake and aaron came and Jake said that he wasnt hitting on meghan at grad parties at all when she had told me he was soo it rocked! cause now I know she's really not as great as she thinks she is. Ohh man so last night was the craziest shit ever. So I get off work and my dad drives me to Ashley's. I get there and nothing in Ashley's house works... it was almost amazing but these kids are the shit so it doesn't even matter. Anyway so me Ashley, Melinda, Ryan, Brittany, Jamie, Ashley's sister Linsey and Matt are chilling in her kitchen. So we start drinking then go outside to the fire. So okay this guy named brian comes and things start getting weird... Me Ashley and Jamie became members of the small boobs club. Jamie told me he didn't hate me but in fact liked me. So I gave him my keychain and then I scratched my back on this car thing and I have a huge cut on my back now. Anyway so things start getting crazy and then Melinda gets sick and pucked all over ashleys room. So we are still outside and Ashley makes out with this brian guy who is an idiot. Then anyway we are sitting beside ashley and Jamie and they start making out! ASHLEY AND JAMIE! OKAY WEIRDEST THING EVER! CAUSE THEY ARE LIKE BEST FRIENDS AND I WAS ALMOST SURE THAT JAMIE WAS GAY. so anyway it was really really crazy. and then I was hanging with everyone and I think I was like one of the only staight one there. But anyway will tell more later. EM

Sooo its been some weird three weeks. Im finding myslef super emotional lately. I can cry over almost anything. So two fridays ago I was suposed to get off work and go to Carly's party at like 12. Anyway her party got busted by teh police and so everyone had left by that time, except for caitlin and lesley... which lesley did stuff to her, anyway So the next day I se Carly and she's like omg Im so sorry, cause we were both at a David Suzuki thing. Whicch wss incredible, that man is a scientific genious. SO anyway after Suzuki her me and duncan went to duncans and then amherst to help he rclean up. It was fun and funny, fuond lots of beer. Anyway so after that we went and picked up hilary and went to sackville. Then Britt, Ashley, Erin, Denise, MEghan, Mike and Ryan went to Mike's to drink. So we were having a fun time as always then Erin had to leave and Brit and Ashley were going with her. So britt stayed and I think Erin was pretty pissed. So after Ash and Erin left things got really weird. Britt told us some personal stuff about who she had done stuff with.. and we were all like ahh wow didn't see that coming. So anyway then we played some odd games involving bottles. So Mike decides we are too drunk and kicks us out, so all of us walk downtown. We go to greco/the park and OH MY GOD guess who's there? None other than like Luke and Seb and Mallory and Carlene and Melanie and Cassie, and HARV! and a truckload of the popular hot kids ha. So we talked for a while. Then Pat and Hilary pull up and we were all over his car I feel so bad now that I think about it. Anyway that was fun then I run down to the curling club because justin richard told me there was a party there and I find Nick and Luke there, and it was a wedding reception. So I run back to the park and there I see things from Denise I could have done without haha. Then Meghan found Jason who was like dieing so she brought him to the hospital and then mike and Denise left. SO me Ryan and brittany were left sittin on the steps takling. So Im sittin there and I look up and I see a police guy standing on a ledge close to us so I was all like oh shit Oh shti then he jumped down and we were like "ahh hey we were jut leaving blah blah blah parents blah blah sorry about being out so late.. bye" he was really nice though so that was interesting. Anyway then Ryan and Britt got a cab and Mike plus Denise walked me home and that was that night. The next week I had some crazy exams. I did my Chemistry one.. and its advanced chemistry on the effin computer it was soo hard but I studied all the right stuff and got 94%.. so anyway that was good. Then last weekend was my Brithday Party... We had planned to have in the woods but then we couldn't do that with so many people. SO no one knew what was going on so we ended up having it at Mike's house because his parents were away. It was Mike, Denise, Ryan, JAmie(Ryan's french Friend haha), Kaider, Ashley, Meghan, Melinda, Britt, and me. So we are partying and leaving and skateboarding and all that and anyway I see Sam walking into his houe and Im all like wow he's hot (drunk). And then he turned around and it was Sam... this guy I can't stand at all so I was like ewww I can't believe I just said that. Anyway so no one I want is there (Dave, Kevan, random Amherst boys).. So Meghan thinks because I said Sam was hott that she would invite him over. Except she forgot I hate and can't stand the fucking kid. So anyway she runs up to me and is like Emily! Sam's coming over. So I know they were doing it to be nice so I only complained a little bit about it but I was really crapped out that no one was there. I was going to invite more people but Mike said he didn't want to many there so I didn't invite too many and the ones I did invite couldn't come. So it really sucked.. I mean I liked most of the people that were there but I really wanted it to be a big woods party. I cried like twice ha... But Mike and Denise had got me a card and a cake and pizza so I didn't say anything to them about it cause they really tried, and I totally appriciated it. Anyway so Sam gets there and through out the nigt Amanda and Sam and Cassandra show up which was fun. Then I walked Amanda home and we chatted. So then Ashley comes bitching to me about Melinda and MElinda hears her and flips. Like really flips, I dont really want to write it but it includes a fridge magnet. And so Ashley told me some really personal sutff about Melinda and herself and Melinda got soo pissed. Ive been keeping myself up to date on the live journal situation which is like the only place they are talking now so anyway I dunno. So Im sleeping with Meghan that night and I hear aAshley outside crying so I get up and go outside and she's upset so I tell her to go sleep with Meghan and Ill pull an all nighter downstairs with passed out Kaider. And so anyway she ended up sleeping with her and wow I was so tired. I would have loved to have slept up stairs in a real bed.. but I slept downstairs on a floor which no pillow or covers ha. Man what a birthday that was. So we get up forget last night and go to Mc ds. That night I closed with Denise and Braedon and didn't do much. Monday I sat around and did nothing... at all. I made a video and put it on youtube... I am a losah. Tuesday was the day of my actual birthday and Denise Meghan and I went to Mels to ahve some food and Denise paid. Then we visited Melinda and looked at prom stuff. Later that nice im out walking and I meet Denise at like 10. So we walk to the park and she goes to see Mike and I go off on my little emo walk listenin to some musak . Then yesterday I went swimming then big stop thensaw mike skateboarding at 10.. again ha... todays prom and grandmarch I can't wait to see it.

Ohh man soo much has happened since that last post. So the next weekend I think we all went to that place agai and dylan left to go chill with tj and dav eand jessica. The TJ came to my house til 3 something then walked to dylans and that was that weekend. Then the next weekend me and Kevan chilled at Dylans with Aaron and Jake and Jess meg and AMY omg love that kid. And it was sooo cute she was like so do you go out with Kevan and I was like umm... not really no. And she's like well you're Emily right? the one he talks about a lot... and I was like AWWW... creepy ha. Anyways we made out so much that night than some dog ran at me and so on. Next weekend got drunk in town pointed at Caitlin with Lesley and Jacob... and liking those kids more! Then Wenesday was the best night of my life. People who went: Sam Cassandra Me Meghan Dustin Kevan Lindsay Laura Leanne Cody Dru Mark Jacob AND JAKE AND AARON AND EVERYONE! Bands: Sydney, Still my Queen and Ten Second Epic... Man what a concert! AWw gawd... so I get there I go driving with sam... squiched into Kevan... I cant say I didn't enjoy it ha... then me and Kev and linds and dus and meg talked for an hour then go to concert and it was amazing. Anyway next day Kevan walks home with Denise and apparently asks her if I like him. Which I do.... but he says he has feelings for me but doesnt want comittment or to be tied down which is exactly what I want.. so I want to talk to him so bad right now... cause im pretty sure he thinks im looking for children from him... anyway got drunk saturday after ryans house... With Mike Denise Ryan Melinda Britt and AShley... and it was the best night evar! got some sweet pics.. Tonight me and ryan and Denise and Mike went ot moncton while meghan worked... Denise bought a prom dress she didnt like and I felt bad but ti was a fun night and now I must go study EMily

All nighter tonight baby! Hah so anyways three day weekend turned out to be a let down... but next weekend will be good. So Thursday me, ryan. tj, mike, harv, and dylan were at mc ds waiting for meghan and denise to get off work. When they did we walked to the woods to find other people partying there! Like we thought we were the only ones who knew about this spot. Anyways turns out it was Rosie, Louis, steve, Nick allen, and mc kay, Evan and Trevor! And oh my god that was so much fun, those kids were awesome. Then dave and mike came! And Dave got really really drunk and it was really really funny and he was talking about how he hadn't had sex and all this stuff and it was sweet cause I absolutely love talking to that kid let alone leaning on him. Then we called Kevin and he came and hung out and then we were walking and meghan lost dylans ipod and everything got shitty from there so yeah.. Then Friday I really wanted to go to Harvs party but I worked and my parents wouldn't let me go out after work. So I come home and the house beside me has the music blaring because they are having a party too, so I open my windows and listen to there music all night wanting to go over there. Then to top things off Tj called me and told how awesome Harvs party was. So my night kind of really sucked. Saturday I workd then went downtown with the crew plus melinda.... which she is now one of us... like it or not.. and nothing big happened. Then again today worked... so it was an alright/ shitty time ha Emily

YESSSSS. So these past couple of days have been absolute shit. Yesterday there was a dance that I thought I could go to, then I found out I had to work that night and almost died. I usually dont care when I miss a dance but this one "he" was going to be there and it would have been so kick ass. We may have danced, may have not but still everyone was there so it totally sucked. Anyway work was soooo busy and it sucked soo hardcore. Then this morning I felt like shit. I was worried about the dance cause I knew the girl he used to like was there and if they like hooked up it just would have really sucked. Anyways so then I worked all day today feeling like shit and I get home and hes not online so I go out with Meghan and Dylan to chill for a bit. So we meet up with Mike and Denise and go to Mel's. We ate and then played a bunch of games of photohunt, so that was kind of fun. Then I get home and he left me a message to call him! So I try a couple times and I cant get ahold of him, by this time it was only 11 so I knew I had time to go out and hang with him if he was around but then I couldnt get ahold of him so I just sat at the computer all night hoping he would come online and when he did he told me to call him then. And he was partying and wanted to invite me but I had been working and like it just made me feel better, which sounds so lame ass, but I cant even deny that I like him. Of course I wouldnt come out and say this to any of the people I hang with cause they're the type that anything you tell them they'll make fun of you for it. But they're fun I guess.. anyway Im playing pool tomorrow with him :) Love this song! Em

So again I suck, the real deal being that me and Kevin hook up and then I think it means more than it does. I always do, I dont know anymore. Like I miss him so much right now and every time I talk to him it makes me soo happy and he's such a funny great guy. But he's like that with everyone and so I don't like he has those kind of feelings for me, so that blows hardcore. But I couldn't see getting together with him anyways, but to just be able to be together more outside partying would be nice. Anyways Justin and Will and I are forming a band. Justin, aww I want to get to know the kid better because he's the type of guy of always thought was super kick ass and I used to have a super big crush on him so ha that could be good. Fackk, big physics test tomorrow that Im deliberatly getting on here to avoid studying for... so this blows. But if the things don't work out with my boiiis here I could go to the mall where this hot guy at the sweet stores been hitting on me/gave me his card. Haha score baby, anyways life's at its best and worst right now... ahh so weird Em

So wow what a couple of weeks... starting with this four day weekend.... Thursday: school for the day then that night I went to Dylans. I didn't know him except from seeing him at school in the talent shows and assemblies and just being a super cool and great guy that I've admired forever now and then finding myself in, Duncan, Carly and Kevan spent the night, drinking and playing pictionary. Friday: Sat around, didn't so much, then went to work an hour early so Valene could go to Halifax with Becker. Had an alright close with, Mark Denise and Braedon. Then walked home with Mike and Denise and watched them jump on random trampolines while I was too scared ahah. Saturday: Oh glorious Saturday! Best day I've had in a very long time. Well started with a beautiful day. I was making preparations for that night and looking for some kick ass CDs to bring to Mikes BBQ. Worked from 2 to 8 with Denise and then we walked in the rain to town. We bought some supplies and kicked it to Mike's. When I got there, Dustin meghan and mike were in the shed BBQing and Melinda, Ashley and Brittany were in the house starting to drink. Then Sam and Cassandra showed up and everyone was feeling fine. Then Scot and Jessica showed up and I totally called out Scott on some personal stuff Jess had told me. Ha it was not good. Next thing I know, Harv, Duncan, Kevin, Dylan and Pat are there! And so now its a party. So we were playing twista, and other stuff. Then dylan and Meghan somehow hooked up and then we got a vid of it haaaaa. And moi and Kev? Then Dustin told me some really personal stuff and I slept in a bed that other people had possibly done it/stuff in it haha what a night. Sunday: Sat around, slept then closed work with denise and braedon and made him a cake for his birthday. He was being such an iditot that night so he can eff himself. Then today I worked 2 till 8 and hung with nicole and liked the new workerrrrrr. And last weekend was great and im a loser burn out. Emmmmers

So this weeks been a weird one. Yesterday I went to my first class and talked to a girl who I thought didn't talk at all and she's quite funny and smarter than I thought, I under estimate people. Then second period was super weird. I had to cook a steak with one of my friends and a girl who used to be my friend way way back in the day, for chemistry. So we were outside just discussing the stuff to do with the lab than my friend went inside to mass something. It was weird talking to this girl who when we were young had been so different. I sat there in my chucks and studded belt with my skate logo shirt on, and then she was wearing her nice jacket and designer jeans and all that. It was just odd how we had changed. And wow akward... I mean we were discussing chemistry, but when I;m trying desperately to make conversation I sound like an idiot ha. Anyways that was weird. Then this morning I got up at 5 went for a walk and saw my physics teacher running. Which was also weird, cause it was five in the morning and I knew I'd see her in like 3 hourd. Anyways then I got to school and found out Britt was having a party on Friday, the night I have to close at work! That sucks sooo incredibly much because the two guys that I want to hook up with are going. I really really want to be there, to at least just talk and be with "him" like at her last party. Friday is going to suck at work, cause I told Mike and Denise Id walk home with them and they are probably going to have something for me to do on the way home and I dont feel like doing stuff. I just want to go to Britts soooooo damn bad! But I need to get up at five tomorrow so im going to bed Em

What a week. Well Starting from this weekend, a guy at my school got into a car accident and flipped his car into a lake. So everyone was upset about that. I got to school monday and as usual I had a effin nose bleed, which lasted all first period so I spent my period in the second last bathroom stall listening to people come in crying. So that was crappy, I felt super bad. Then today I spent half of first period with a nose bleed in the bathroom. So I'm about ready to cu tmy nose off. Then two of my friends started being bitches to each other and just making the other one feel like shit and it just doesnt seem to make sense like if they both left each other alone theyd both be happy but they can seem to do that. So that sucks, and each of them tells me what an idiot the other one is, and that something hard to hear, cause they both have good points Im beginning to think they are boy idiots. Anyways I just really want to get away from here. Super bad, Im tired of school and people and the drama of retarded things. So I'm thinking of going up to Toronto with a friend when she goes to visit friends her and me have up there, Im thinking that sounds really fun. Anyways kinda hating everyone right now, except Justin, I dunno....

So tonight was aight, crappier then I thought it was going to be though. I went to see good old Sam Roberts (cause we only get local talent anywhere around where I live). Haha so Sam Roberts was a big name to come to here. I get to the building and there was quite a line so I'm like shit I'm never going to get a seat, then I get in there and I think we filled like six out of the like 30 some rows, it was funny how little people were there, not much more then 100. So I was front row beside these two girls who fainted everytime Sam came near them, it was some funny shit. Emma and her posse (Nat, Margot, Mel, and Kenzie), Allie and Jami, Lindsay, Sam and Caitlin plus the rest of the improv team were there. And Alyson a girl I met last summer so that part was kicking. Then after I was suposed to go to Drus party but I figured I'd go hang out with the Megs and Jill but turns out nothing went down with that, so that sucked. So I come home tonight to find Mike's screen name talking about his new girlfriend. Well... ha I'd like to say I don't care, but it seems as if I do. I've had a few guys since him and I don't know they're better looks wise but man I don't even know what I like about him. Oh well I think I'm over liking Justin now, we hooked up at a party but that was alcohol fun, so I dunno whats up with that. Im trying to give Emma advice on her guy issues when I definitely need some with mine, haha its no good. Em

Soooooo starting from yesterday. Well actually, Friday I had a horrible close at work and didn't get out until 1:03am! Then the next morning I had to get up at 8 to drive three hours in a full car to watch figure skating. Does any of that sound good? Actually I have a lot more respect for figure skating it was effing intense. Anyways it was Mike, Denny, Meghan, Duncan and myself going to see Carly skate and hopefully win gold. So we get there meet Carly then watch the lesser ranked kids skate. Then Carly skated, she was kickin but so was her competition, and when she met us she said that she would have to do really good in the final skate and her competition would have to mess up really bad in the final skate for her to win. So it was looking hard but doable. Then we shoved six people in a five person car, and drove to Carlys hotel to have a picnic. We had some funky food, which I think ulmitaly made like all of us sick. Then we went to subway and Carly went back to the rink. Meghan said she felt sick so we let her sleep in the car and me Duncan, Mike and Denise found this kickass playground and had a good time haha. Then Meghan was sick so we picked up Carly and went to get some drugs for meghan at the mall. There I picked up some fake emo glasses ha which Denise immediately stole and they looked smoking on her so we headed back to the rink and dropped Carly off, and then we waited and went and got a seat. We watched her practice and she couldn't land this one jump and it hurt me so much everytime she didn't make it. Then her competition skated first. She landed a couple of her jumps and fell twice, so if Carly landed everything she would get gold. She started off well landed her first jump, all her spins and shit were good, then she fell on that hard jump, but she didn't seem bothered and kept going, ten the second jump she missed she looked really dissapointed, and then the third she was in tears, but more from the pain I'm guessing. She finished strong and when she was coming off the ice she was hunched over. Her knees were really sore as well as back. Then we went to the medal ceremony and she seemed okay and happy, and then she got second, and the girl who beat her was an absolute bitch. Carly was like good job and she was like yeah, she didn't even smile. Anyways then we had to shove sick Meghan, sore Carly and the other four of us feeling shitty in a five person car. So I was by carly, so I spent 3 hours on the floor in between the seats so carly could lay behind me and sleep. And Meghan was sleeping in the front seat. Then Mike, Denise, Duncan and me had the best game of sex (you see a car with one headlight and yell sex, last person to yell takes a article of clothing off) ever! We got Mike completely naked. And just as we did Meghan woke up and said she was going to throw up so we pulled over, and she did. So we had to get to a gas station to get her out in the air and to walk around. When we got there Carly woke up next to naked Mike, haha and to top things off a cop car pulls up to get gas right beside us as meghan is getting out, so the lights are on in the car. It was pretty funny. Then we drove home and dropped everyone off and then me denise and mike talked about what a fun yet shitty night it was. In other news the remake of "the mixed tape" by Jacks Mannequin has began. I've got the whole thing written out, now its a matter of finding Ewan and getting him to agree to doing it. Im psyched. Anywayssss work sooon Em<3

So it's official, Ive had the best weekend of my life this weekend. Well Saturday I got up and waited all day for TJ to come see but he didn't so I met him at the Joel Plaskett concert. Joel PLaskett being a little band from Canada so I'm guessing not a lot of people have heard of them, but if youre into that indie shit they'll rock your socks. So I get to the concert and spot TJ with the smokin Dylan haha. Then Luke and Peter and Emma showed up and we all sat together and it was so crazy. Like last year I idolized these guys, I would have like gave anything to talk to them, let alone hang out with them, and now Im friends with some of them and its such a kick ass year. Then the concert was amazing, Joel Plaskett is just so effing great. Then tonight I closed at work with Jacob and Steve and we all hurried through our work so we could get outside and set off a firecracker. Shit, it was crazy, and it was the first time since me and jake kissed that I felt like I didn't hate him so that was nice. And Jeff was in! Haha he was confessing to a bunch of people that he thinks he might be gay and he was asking me for gay ryans phone number. And I had it but certainly didn't give it to him. I can't wait to tell Ryan all this tomorrow. I love that kid, he's so nice and will help you through anything. Anyways so this guy named Justin has been talking to me a lot cause he wants to start a band,and I'm thinking thatd be rad. But Justin just seems so awesomely sweet and stuff, and we half hooked up at a party but we were drunk and Im thinking he likes some other girl but I think I do actually like him. Which is crazy cause last year he was such a player and I thought he was the biggest asshole. And speaking of assholes I was thinking a lot about my ex. We were together all last year and when we kissed we ended a certain way haha, anyways and like kissing now is so weird and it really made me miss him, which is sick cause hes such a hick and like the people I hang out with now are soo much more me then he ever was but ahhh. Then there's this hott Greg, who I've made no effort to talk to, I commented on some good music that was being played but i dont think he heard me ha... but Im thinking that he'd be so coool to be with but whatever. Then there's this kid I totally thought was hott and I was like hitting on, and then I found out that hes too young for me to be doing that so I felt embarassed haha. And Emma liked Donald and Donalds now going out with Kayla and Emma was crushed, but I totally helped her turn that to hate:). But this weekend was so amazing, school tomorrow is going to be soo horrible wen I compare it to last weekend. Last week sucked... I scratched my eye or something valentines day and I had to go home cause it was like red as anything, and Will drove me which was really sweet of him, cause I looked freaking hideous. Anyways its really late EM<3

Hey yo, arg, so I woke up this morning to find a storm outside, but of course they didn't cancel school. So I had to walk 10 minutes to my friends house and get a ride with her, it was very crappy. Then I got to school and went to home room to get my new classes. English was normal, Math I have the two exange students, one from Mexico, and one from Australia, are in my math class now. So thats cool. Then third I have Physics. That is such a kick ass class. I have like a small awesome people class I can hardly wait to do some labs and stuff in that class it is sweet. Then Accounting with Roberts, which has one of the most gorgeous guys I've ever seen in it. I don't even know why, he's not like that good looking, but Im liking him so much. He's got a un-gel-ed mohawk type thing and hes just so kick assy looking. All class I couldn't even pay attention cause I was looking at him ha, which sounds more weird then anything but ahh I must at least become friends with him through out this class. He's plays the bass I think too so its crazy. Anyways then I have Chemistry 121, which is basically advanced Chemistry and it's on the net and its pretty alright. So my classes are definitely rocking. Along with the guys in them... hmmm, have a good one Em

What a weekend I've had! Well this week was exam week so on thursday I went out with some friends to celebrate the end of exams. So we went sliding and drank and went out for pizza, it was pretty fun but i wasnt in a drinking mood so I just kept what I had got for that night. Then I worked friday night and had a crappy close with Denise and Courtnay. With Courtnay telling me and Denise what to do all night but whatever. Then yesterday I got up and went to work at 2. I worked with Caitlin, Meg, Denise, Braedon, Danika, Ryan and Jacob, and it was such an awesome load of people, I swear we did no work and no one cared. Except Meghan kept saying stuff over the head sets, like I was taking orders and she'd tell off a customer then when they got to the window they'd think it was me ha. Then I got off at 8 and my parents picked me up and drove me to Britts for her party. So my parents stayed in the house and all the kiddos walked like a 5 minute walk to a pond where they had a bonfire going and were skating. When I got there everyone was already drunk and it didnt take much time catching up. I had what I had brought plus some of other peoples plus what I didnt drink the other night so within an hour I was ready to go. Then I was rolling around in the snow and Craig rolled on top of me and kissed me and my good friend Mary Kate likes him so I was like wtf? Ha but then he went and tried to get it on with Britt and Jamie who both have boyfriends and it was really funny. Then I gave the rest of one of my cooler to Justin who I knew little about. Then we walked around the damn pond a million times talking about his past relationships and how we were going to take advantage of each other... it was all talk. Ha it was fun though, very cold though. Then Travis was like I've never kissed a girl before and I was trying to hook him and Bekah up and he's like no Emily I want someone hot. And it was sad haha, but I was like ahh go find someone else Trav. Anyways then he got sick and threw up and went back to the house. Then I left and found out Craig woke up puking this morning so that was too bad. But despite the weirdness the night was really fun, got some new buds, but I'm off to work, to close with Braedon, what a kid, laters yo EMMMM

So wow, so much has happened already in 2006. Well this was one of the most screwed up weekends. It started Friday, I closed at Mc Ds with Justing and Denise. We had all closed the previous Friday and it was pretty fun so I was thinking this Friday would be just as good. So anyways it was busy as hell we gave out raw nuggets, everything was screwed up and it really sucked. Then it was our manager Ron's Birthday on Saturday so when the clock turned 12AM we sang Ron Happy Birthday and gave him and Apple Pie wrapped Mc Donalds napkins. Plus we made him a poem. So at least that was alright. Then Saturday I woke up and discussed plans of going out that night. I had to work till 9 and then Mike and Denise walked up to Mc Ds and then we walked to the woods. There we met up with Duncan and Meghan and Tj and Harv. We made a fire and toasted marshmellows, and drank... It was fun at the time till things started going really wrong. First a couple people got too tipsy and one cheated on his girlfriend, and he plans on pretending like nothing happened... that sucks, cause hes girlfriends a nice kid. Anyways then everyone was sort of coupled up except for Harv, and he told us some really personal stuff about his parents and stuff... it was sad. Then we went and met Ryan and he tryed to make TJ think that TJ was gay so ryan could get with him, which was actually pretty funny. Then later in the night some bad stuff happened between Mike and Denise, with different names. And today everyone was like oh my god last night was screwed. So that kind of sucked, then work today was suck ass again. And school tomorrow doesn't sound very promissing. So its unfortunate but whatever. Em*

Happy 2006. New Years last night was the best one of my life. Well I had Kayla mad at me that I didn't go to her house but she asked me last minute and I had plans. So when Meghan got off work she told me that Mike and Denise were going to come pick us up and we were going to go meet Carly and Duncan and go somewhere to party. Then I sucessfully annoyed Meghans little brother who was stuck at home all night. Jessica and Scott showed up out of nowhere and it was really weird because by then I had started drinking and it was just really weird. Then Denise and Mike show up on foot and we can't get a hold of Duncan and Carly. So we begin to drink what Mike had bought for us. And it was so crazy. We made a list of things to do that night of like 15 things and did all but two I believe, after we had drank some we walked to Braedons house, by this point it was like 11 something. So Meghan and Denise go to knock on the door and Braedon wasn't home. So when they come back I tell them that Mikes in the woods when he's really right behind me and they went looking and that was the funniest thing ever. Then we went back to Meghans and her parents called saying they'd be home soon... so we had to clean up the many bottles then Meghan told her parents she had to walk us all home. So we start tumbling home and Meghans on the ground and cant walk, so we end up taking her back to her house then we walked to the school and Denise and Mike both fell on one another. So then they walked me home, or more like I walked them to my house. So I went inside told my parents I smelt like booze cause meghans parents were drinking, and all was good, then I look out the window and Mike and Denise are just standing there making out. They left after like five minutes and then I see one of them throwing up on my neighbors lawn. So it was pretty funny and bad, but the night was kickass overall anyways so whatever. Em*

So holidays have been lame, been doing the family thing. Anyways... today I was practicing the drums and I heard someone knocking at my door. So I go to get it and there's three kids that I often see drunk at the hockey games asking me if Hayden was here... I knew that he played the drums too, and I was like umm no. They're like well is it you playing the drums? and Im like yes, and then they told me it sounded good and then I made them leave because they were creepy. Then I work and got to put the lion from Chronicles of Narnia in a 400 degree thing of grease... it suprisingly did nothing, strong plastic. And now im trying to keep my crazy mother happy... wow she tries way too hard. New Years tomorrow! Do I have plans? Of course nothing definite but I have some options so its all good. Kayla pissed that I don't want to spend it at her house way out of town... sober! Eff that, She can only do stuff when shes not with Joey and I've never complained and shes pissed that I'mnot ditching my plans to go with her, when I invited her to come into town... wow its always about the drama with her... whateve... Hopefully I won't remember tomorrow night :) Have a good night, mle

Holy Shit. The stupidest thing has happened, I'm starting to like my effing ex. We don't talk I see him and think he's retarded I really don't know what is happening. Sometimes when Im alone I think about what it would be like if we were still together but that's usually just because Im lonely cause no ones around, but I was with a friend all day and that's all I could think about. We don't talk anymore and it makes things so hard. It's like we are fighting or something and ahh he's online right now, I want to talk to him so bad. I can't though, cause I suck. He's a nice guy, but ultimately everything I hate in music and in a personality, and I know if we ever hooked up again it wouldn't work. But last christmas at this time we kissed for the first time and it was sooo cute and we took things so incredibly slow. Then this year comes and Im doing random drunken makeout sessions ha, and it was what I thought I wanted, single and free. But I want that back, that being super green back ha. Everythings just so screwed. And I had a dream and he was talking to me online saying he missed me and I just want to know how he feels. We were together a long time and when we broke up it didn't affect me but I'm feeling it now. And I've hooked up since him and he knows it and probably has moved on and doesnt care but I'd like to know. I have too much pride to drag this shit up but fuck... I just want to talk...