Things only go away if you let them to. I've told you this plenty of times before, but I wish you started believing me. The day you accept that you have complete control over your life is the day that you can be whatever you want to be (or be with whomever... for that matter :) ).
I'm pretty sure that you know this, so excuse me if you do. I wanted to tell you though.
Oh, and, as far as missing something all the time goes... yes, that's possible. I miss Lizzy every day that I don't see her, and that every day that I do. When I don't see her, I miss her. But when I do see her, I'll miss certain events that have happened between us in the past. But, I also realize that the person is and always will be, more important than the idea. I've also come to the realization that if you do miss the idea while you're
with them, to be sure not to be so wrapped up in it to the extent where you miss what is going on around you.
So this sounds cliche, but I hope it helps you any. Feel free to talk to me more if you want to. Or feel free to look at me in disgust that I would actually take somewhat of a caring interest into how you're feeling. Either or.
There are going to be things in life that we are going to regret doing. But it's always been my opinion that it's better to do something than to lament over your desicion to not do it. Love (or whatever word you want to associate your feelings with at the sake of your anxiety) is a multifaceted thing. It isn't always happy, it isn't always roses and chocolate- it isn't always those camera-swirling kisses seen on the movies. Love is pain, love
is pain, love is life, love is beauty, love is every and any feeling you can experience with someone you truly care about. One of the worst things you can do to a person (besides the extremely obvious) is to never tell them about your feelings. How foolish can you be to cut yourself and the other person from something that may be? I know it's hard to tell someone how you feel (you HAVE to believe me on this one), but you have to. Well, you
don't have to per se, but would you rather tell him and have him say no (and negate his chances with a wonderful young woman such as yourself) than to never tell him and live in a world of what-ifs? Believe me, getting over heart break is much easier than getting over regret. All you have to do for heartbreak is call up Fe, Kelsey and Chelsea, tell them to rent Elizabethtown and watch it with them, aided with your friends Ben and Jerry.
Whereas regret is much, much more difficult to get over- and requires a lot of unnecessary self-loathing and awful questions. Believe me, I have regretted telling a few girls that I had feelings for them (there's even one story in particular, that if you haven't heard yet [I'm pretty sure you have though, I know how girls talk] I'll tell you tomorrow)- but it was much easier to deal with, then having regret and not telling them.
I think my biggest piece of advice to you is to be completely honest. Stop living in the ambiguity of your words and false hopes and wild wonder. Go up to him and tell him how you feel. But if you want, we can talk about this more tomorrow (I'd prefer it in person because I don't like giving advice over the internet too often). Feel better Stephannie. Love, Garrett
I'm pretty sure that you know this, so excuse me if you do. I wanted to tell you though.
Sincerely,
So this sounds cliche, but I hope it helps you any. Feel free to talk to me more if you want to. Or feel free to look at me in disgust that I would actually take somewhat of a caring interest into how you're feeling. Either or.
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...but she's not afraid to die, the people all call her alaska...