i remember one time we walked to the ice cream shop a few blocks over. you kept a half step ahead of me that day, a difference so small i'm sure no one that we passed on the sidewalk even noticed.

you let my hand in yours dangle, by the fingertips. a touch that may still look like one of affection to others but it was strange to me since i was used to walking with our fingers interlocked, snug and close to you as we walked in unison.

the realizations were fleeting and i brushed them off, pushed them to the back of my mind with the others.

the thoughts i've compartmentalized are pushing back through, even these months and months after you left me.

to be frank, it hurts but it's also a bit therapeutic i suppose.