Chilly night

All I can think about lately is the enormous amount of stress and disorganization I have going on. It's driving me nuts. & Then I read Nicks blog. The most true and genuine man I have ever met in my life. I'm crossing my fingers. I will absolutely fall apart if I lose him. He's so sick and fighting so hard. I keep telling myself he will beat cancers ass..and god knows I want to believe it but I'm so scared. I would never tell him or anyone that..But blah. I feel like I have gotten so twisted up in my own mess of a life that I haven't been the best friend or person for him that I could be.There's no excuse, I just need to do it. I love him. God I love him dearly. If there's any one person outside of family who absolutely needs to be in my childs life..it's him.

Come back Nick..keep going. I love you I love you I love you.

This world is a wonderful place because you are in it.

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