so basicly. my mom is being the biggest bitch on the west side of evansville. me and her havent gotten along since i was in the first grade when she punched me in the face and said that i was a bitch. just cuz i woke her up asking for water. whatever. we worked through that. so i thought. she hadnt laid a hand on me in a few months so i thought that everything was okay for a while. but i was wrong. like always. me and her got into a fight. this happens EVERY night. i cant stand it. but it does. i was doing my chores and i just so happened to piss my mom off cuz i wasnt listening to her. (i had my headphones on and the volume was all the way up. i cant hear a thing when im like that. i go into my own little world.) anyways. i was blocking her out when out of nowhere. she knocks the cd player into the sink. (thank god that there wasnt water in it yet.) but it went in and my headphones fell off my head and into the sink too. well. instead of worring about my cd player. i worried about my jamison parker cd. i love it. i just got it yesterday. and already i know 3 of the songs. but i checked it and it was scratched like non other. anyways. i screamed. and this was a loud pitched "if you dont leave me the fuck alone i'll pick up this knife that im getting ready to wash and slit your fucking throat" scream. she looked at me and punched me in my face. the right side of my face was beat red. i wanted to kill. and i was going to if i had my way. instead of cutting like i might have done about a month ago. (i havent slit my wrists for a whole month. go me!) i called my friend trinity. i call her for just about anything. when she heard me crying she left the bonfire that she was at to go back to her house and call me back where we had better reception. i was balling and i wanted to cut. but she told me that i needed to calm down and tell her what happened. when she heard she wanted to come and get me. but my mom wouldnt let me leave the house. so i couldnt get away. then my mom told me that i had to go with her to sell girlscout cookies and that if i didnt i wasnt going ANYWHERE for a month. i told her i'd go. i went. but i didnt want to do anything and i looked like i worshipped satan. and im sure that everyone else thought so. so i joked around about it and my mom freaked out on me saying that NO child of hers worships satan. so in a joking manar i told her that i had known i wasnt her daughter for quite some time now and was just trying to figure out when i should tell her. she got pissed and told me that i was grounded for two months and that when we got home she was going to kick my ass. lucky for me. my sister who went, got to go to grinders with her friends and mom needed my help bad. so not only am i ungrounded. i also got her to buy me my energy drink that she had promised to me. i was happy. but now shes all being a bitch again. and i swear that if i get bitched out again this week or slapped again this week i'll call my dad and be all "im moving to oragon to live with you if you can come up with the money for the plane ticket." i cant stand my parents and im ready to kill. i really am. well. i should go. this diary is probably longer than anything ever. mcuh love. ♥brittany.