I have no idea what's going on now. I'm completely fucked in the head about it, which is totally not fair because I was the one who was completely not fucked about it because I was just going with the flow. Now he's all fucked in the head about it he's passed on the fear / panic to me. I thought we were just going to have some fun and now I don't know what's wrong. I genuinely don't know.
1) he doesn't fancy me but doesn't want to say so
2) he does fancy me but wants to get with someone else or has something going on with someone else
3) he wants me but doesn't want to mess things up at work
4) he wants me but thinks I'm only capable of / only want long term serious relationships and he doesn't
5) he believes me when I say I don't want to move into anything serious but that's what he wants even though he said the opposite and doesn't want to get hurt
6) he wants me but he's scared to have anything happen with me because of low self esteem? Seems unlikely
7) he wants me but he's nervous because he's a virgin (this is barely possible and very implausible, Helen's idea)
8) he wants me but only when drunk
9) he wants me but doesn't want to treat me badly so doesn't want to get with me in case he fucks it up
10) he's constructed an elaborate web of lies to forge a completely new confident / arrogant persona over the years to overcompensate for his insecurities and is scared that if we get together I'll start to penetrate beyond his outer facade and that I will then be able to hurt him
Yes, I may have thought this through. I'm trying very hard not to be a complete idiot and give him time to think or whatever but I'm not a very patient person, especially when I want something, and I'd much rather just know what's going on. I don't know how to act around him at the moment, and I'm a bit worried about how to act around him at work. I don't know. I just don't know. Why won't he just tell me he's not interested, make it blatantly obvious through actions, or make a move? I just don't get it.
ARGH.
Men.
What can you do with them?