Padriac, my prince..if youre out there

Dont i always wrap myself up in this little predicaments? Im always thinking i have this in control, that the ball is in my court and then i'll get hurt and realize i wasnt in any type of control. I realize that i am falling recklessly and out of control into a lifestyle of dependence. Theres so many reasons i need you right now. The fear of ruining something wonderful is over powering and im afraid for my heart-again.
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omg its marisabel. where you been guuurrll?