well the DAY was fabulous i spent it with rachel so you know there is no way of describing it. although it tore me apart to have to leave her. once im with her my heart clings onto her like shes paper && im glue. so its kind of hard to leave. but the NIGHT has been one of the worst fucking nights ive ever gone through i dont know how the hell i came out of it alive. ive cried my eyes out since 1000 pm && its now 741 am the next day. it was just really hard i didnt really have anyone to talk to && rach was at a party drinking so she was busy and ashley is out of town richard was at a party && i didnt have my cell. i really have never cried this much a day in my life. its soo insane. i just wanna hear rachels voice i wanna be in her arms i keep closing me eyes wishing that when i open them ill see her pretty face...but when i open them everything is the same...i dont know...