note: here's a re-post from another site i'm at. it may be a bit repetitive, for which i apologise, but i should at least post an update when i've got one, heh. i have been reading like a madwoman lately. last week, i read (and finished) one book each day. most of the reading was actually done during work (shh don't tell), but my productivity didn't suffer for it, so i'm not too worried. i hadn't been to the library in awhile, so i kind of outdid myself. i walked out with a stack of books, an even bigger stack of DVDs, and some old-time radio show CDs. and i'm still waiting on some items to come in. i also ordered a new book on amazon a few days ago. i can't wait for it to get here. i'm a book-fiend. work has been canceled for the week, so i'll have to file unemployment . . . before our TWO-WEEK VACATION starts on monday. after over four years of working at this place, you'd think i'd know to plan this better. but the lay-offs don't usually come up until mid-september, so i thought i was being crafty. fat chance, but at least i'm getting paid for part of it. mike, meanwhile, is getting paid for all of it; he has two weeks of vacation that must be used up before thanksgiving (they don't allow people to take off on holidays - how fucking stupid is that?), so he came up with this nifty little idea. so i guess i've got three weeks off. that should give me some time to accomplish all the shit i've got piled up. i hope. it's been very grey out for the past week, raining off and on. i don't mind too much, though - this time of year, i always get excited for fall. i'm not entirely ready for summer to end - at least, not until after our vacation is over - but when i think of the leaves changing, the colour of an autumn sky, and the scent that always comes with the season, i get a bit excited. then i go christmas-crazy. it's already started; i've been wanting to watch 'holiday inn' and, since we're going to chicago for part of our hols next week, 'while you were sleeping.' as far as the wedding and europe are concerned, here's a lazy-arsed copy+paste from that dreadful mind-trap, myspace: europe will be a one-month trip to start. the first two weeks will be spent gallivanting round as many countries and sights as we can comfortably fit; if we like the atmosphere and feel it'd be possible to actually move there altogether, the next two weeks will be spent finding a place to live/stay and a place to work. if it ends up being more difficult than is possible, we'll spend the entire month traipsing round instead. i'm hoping for the former; however, if it turns out to be the latter, we'll have our hol and then come home for a bit . . . and shift our aim toward moving to canada. if we get married in europe, it'll be an elopement, with a reception and vow-renewal here. otherwise, we'll have the ceremony here as well, and we've a few places in mind for that. still trying to figure out the best solution to this, but we'll take it as it comes. in other news, we're trying to find a new place to live. if we want to do all the shit listed above, we're gonna have to save some more cash. there's a place not too far from here that we've been thinking of. it's a one-bedroom, which is less than we've got now (2-bedroom with 1200 total sq. ft.), but it's quite spacious as is -and- it has a nice-sized kitchen with an ELECTRIC STOVE. i don't mind the gas stove we've got now, but electric is, to me, much easier to cook with/on. we'll be saving $50 every month's rent, plus everything except electricity is included - even off-street parking. we'd have our own entrance, too, so we wouldn't be disturbing anyone else. i hope mike goes for it. (= sorry for being such a slacky-wanker on posting. when i -am- home, i'm usually cleaning or cooking for the bake-sale or trying to work on the tattoo design i should've finished by now. otherwise, we're out walking (weight-loss plan still in action) or grocery shopping or doing whatever else. i'll try to be more efficient, but we all know i've said that a million times before.

what's with this updating-soon-after-my-last-entry crap? i never do this. ;] i was actually going to sooner, but i worked a lot this past weekend at my security job - all twelve-hour shifts. i love that job, though it has two negatives: ( . . . well, three, if you count the increasingly corporate-mindedness) 1) i end up being soso tired afterward, and my inclination is to sleep at night, so third shift is a tiring one. (i work third anyway; days sucks - it's waaaay too hectic.) 2) on the days i'm working out there, my schedule is like this: work, come home and sleep, eat, and go back to work. not much couple-time, but the money is great and it's not an every day thing. things with mike's fam have improved . . . a bit. i think. his mum is so frickin' hard to read, and i'm always wondering if she's being honest or just telling people what they want to hear. my guess is that it's the latter; mike even inherited a bit of that, though i made sure that stopped QUICK. either way, i told him we have two options - this relationship consists of HE and I and we stop letting other people dictate our decisions, or this relationship consists of HIM, HIS MUM, HIS DAD, and I - and the 'I' part of it scrams as a result. (we're still together. he chose wisely.) i don't understand how people can be so, so two-faced. i know that it's often about not wanting to hurt another's feelings, but when it's over trivial bullshit or something that -intentionally- hurts someone, i stop comprehending it. i know we all do this from time to time; the problem i have is when it's blatant and done constantly, with no regard for others, and the person doing it refuses to acknowledge and/or change the behaviour. ah, well. so we haven't been over to see them as much. i'm going to be civil, but if any shit starts in the future, i told mike i'm going to just get up without saying anything and leave. we haven't mentioned the wedding at all to them since the last fiasco, and things seem to be a bit more 'back to normal.' hope i can keep that going. it really feels like fall today. i know it's only august - which is supposed to be our hottest month - but the sky is that faded colour and the wind's a bit colder than it was in july. i've even seen some leaves jumping off the trees. i always get excited for fall and winter round this time, but this is insane - i can't decide if i like it or not. =P (i'm going with 'yes,' since it makes me feel cheerier.) at least we have some near-definitive plans coming along. for the wedding, we've decided to stick with spring of 2009 for now and get the europe trip done first, since we'd been working on that before he proposed. we'll do a month 'trip' in the EU and see if we like it enough to stay; if not, then we'll try to move to canada. i'll keep you all posted on how things progress. (= how's everyone doing this week? i'm going to go check up on you lovely favourites of mine. have a swell evening, everyone! (= (ps. thanks for the kind thoughts, daytripper. (= unfortunately, i can't tell you this on your diary cos it's 'FO,' so i hope you come across this or are directed here by another.)

this should be a happy time, but ever since we've become engaged, it's been stressful. my parents have been awesome, but mike's have been the complete opposite. his mum, especially, has been getting on my nerves, and she makes no attempt to hide her apparent disdain. so much for having a good relationship with them. i wish mike would tell them to mind their own business, but i can't expect him to do that when a) they're his parents and b) he still (subconsciously or otherwise) seeks their approval. he'll never get it, cos he'll never be good enough, but it's really not my place to tell him what to do. anyhow. it's been causing friction and stress, so i told mike today that it's got to end. this relationship is he and i alone; as such, we should be the only two that decide where/when/how we're getting married, as well as what we choose to do with our lives. he seemed to agree, so i'm hoping it lasts. it's going to be a busy weekend. michael actually had the night off tonight, but he opted to work out at road america (much to my chagrin), so i'm alone again. i'll be working out there this weekend, though he's got his regular job all weekend (his next night off is tuesday), so i wouldn't see him anyway. i know we need the money for our trip, though it still bugs me that he spends his 'night off' working when i'd had some things planned. i'll get over it, though. anyhow, not much else to report at the mo. i'm trying to deal with the stress, so i've not been feeling too well lately. i hope i can feel normal again soon - feeling shitty sucks. sooooooooooo hope you're all doing well in internetland. ;] take care, everyone.

so here are a few of the cards. i took photos of them all, but i can't fit any more into my image manager, so i picked out the best ones to put on here. the pictures were the best i could get on limited time; i still have a lot of stuff to do for the party yet, but i figured i'd post these while i'm taking a short break. so, without further ado &c, the cards. from my mum's set: (^ jukebox) (^ pink poodle) and from mike's mum's set: (^ the record says: ELVIS PRESLEY 'All Shook Up!') this is a close-up of the 'hat' one before i wrote all over it: i do always draw 'free-hand,' though it would've been much easier to find graphics on the comp and glue them on, rofl. wouldn't be as personal, though, i suppose. i wish i would've taken pictures of all the cards prior to adding the writing, but eh, one learns . . . hope everyone has a great hol and an excellent week (=

what a busy month so far! there are a few news-bits to report, i suppose . . . on 4 july, along with the typical independence day celebrations, i am throwing a large birthday party of sorts - for three people at once. ('damn,girl!' or something.) mike's birthday was earlier this month; also, since my mum and mike's mum both recently turned 50, it'll be '50s-themed, which i am excited about. i've still got a way to go with the preparation, but we actually live in a place large enough to [drum roll] accomodate real, live guests!, so i'm not worrying about it. as for the mums' gifts, i'm making each a series of cards which'll be tied together with ribbon or something of the sort. each one will have a different category with 1957-specific details. they're looking pretty neat so far - i'm pleased with my artwork to the point that i'm hesitant to have to give them up, hah. for mike, well, he gets cake. he already got his presents ON his birthday - and who doesn't like cake?? =P in other news, we may be moving next year. we're aiming for the end of our current lease (april-ish of 2008) and are going to go to either . . . europe or australia. i've always wanted to live in europe (germany, france, holland, somewhere like that), but aus sounds good to me, too - and mike's partial to it, so that may ultimately be where we wind up. i'll be sure to update any changes in this scheme of ours, bwahahah. i really wish there were other, more interesting things to write about, but there really isn't much. i've been busy, but in a boring way, i guess. =P hope all of you are having a terrific weekend. (=

it's may already! time really seems to fly by faster each year. any of you have that happen, too? we're now in the new place and have been for a few weeks. i absolutely love it here; it feels like home. i'll have to take pictures when everything is settled in - including my bloody camera, which, for the life of me, i can't seem to locate. the inside is pretty well finished, except for two things: the bathroom - we're apparently getting marble floors and an entirely new sink/vanity, brilliant!; and the roof (deck), which, i'm told, will be completely finished within a week or two (or, if something comes up, by the first week in june at the latest). then it's tiki-time! (= apart from unpacking and sorting all of our junk-piles (goodwill loves me right now) and dealing with the mound of dishes we've managed to accumulate, it's nice to be able to relax a bit. when linus isn't running round like a decapitated fowl, he's plunked down on the couch, in a sunbeam on the floor, or on the nearest window-sill. one of my favourite things about this new place is my ability to turn our kitchen into a '50s-style diner. at least, of the 'inspired-by' sort. once everything is put away in there and i can finish decorating, it's going to be really cool - even down to the curtains! the extra bedroom remains thus far a storage room. we're able to fit BOTH kitchen sets (the glass one and my chrome 'diner' set) in the kitchen, and we have too many boxes &c in the spare room to be able to do much with it. i don't mind, though - it's sooo nice to have all this extra room, and keeping things in there guarantees that i don't have to constantly look at it like i did in the old place. if i manage to condense and clear out enough, it might change; if not, that's perfectly swell, too. my birthday was a total blast, from start to finish. we had more fun than we could remember - and who says family can't rock?! i even got to sing with the band that night!, and i kicked ass on the tambourine. some friends showed up, too, and we danced our bums off! it was an absolutely fabulous night. the whole week that followed was great, and we went out with our friend brad on that next saturday, which was a lot of fun, too. (= (if he remembers it, hah) as for today, work was cancelled, so i get a bit of free-time. i have a lot of things to get done, so it worked out well. (= i suppose i should 'get crackin',' though, or i'll still be running errands 'til midnight! have a great day and weekend, everyone! life's too short to be spent looking down! (=

it says i am still 22 years old; some kinda time-warp, eh? [edit: just changed it. pretty odd, anyhow.] lots of things have changed in the past two years. recent events: michael and i just moved into a bigger place - twice the size of our old one! it is a w e s o m e .; we're both looking for better careers, we now have a kitten called linus (who uses the toilet - 'honest to God') and i've gone through a lot of positive (and negative) things in the past few years, but it's put me in a far better direction. i'm really a pretty boring person, but i don't mind too much. i went through quite a bit in the past, so, to me, 'boring' isn't as bad as it sounds. i hope everyone is doing well. i'll try to keep better tabs on this thing, but i'm a habitual procrastinator with more than a bit of forgetfulness. anyhow, have a spectacular day!! (=

i suppose i should update, huh? ;] mike and i went to madison last weekend to visit my cousin and her bf, whom i used to work with. we had an awesome time . . . aside from the insane heat. it was nice to get out of here for a few days, and we went to some great places. there's a restaurant called 'portabella,' under which there's a bar called 'the wine cellar' - which happens to be a really awesome place. they also have the greatest drink ever - 'marilyn's martini.' it is aaaaaaahhhhh-wesome. tonight, we went out with some friends in the city i grew up in; it was a lot of fun, and it was very nice to see them again. i did see a few people i don't much care for, but even that didn't ruin my mood; time has passed, people change, and it's really, ultimately, unimportant in the grand scheme of things. it made me think, though, how, even as recent as a year ago, i probably would've let it kill my night, had i even had the guts to go to those places to begin with. i'd had a lot of issues that i didn't feel i could resolve, and i'd felt uncomfortable and insecure at even the mere thought of seeing people from 'the past.' however, i've really let go of a lot of things in the past year, and i've worked hard to decrease the frequency with which i worry, am negative, and feel self-conscious and insecure. tonight was the first night that i really saw strong evidence of these changes, and i'm really proud of myself for turning my outlook and attitude into something so different from what it'd been for all those years. i must sound like a hippie or something, heh. in related news, the place i work at doesn't recycle plastic, which, to me, NEEDS to be re-used whenever possible. i'm trying to be more proactive and exhibit positive behaviour, so i decided to ask if the owners would let ME bring in something to put plastics in so that I'D do the recycling for them. they agreed, so it'll start on monday! it may be a small thing to be excited over, but i think the little things matter, too. (= anyhow, it's time for bed! hope everyone is having / has had a wonderful weekend!!! _________ update - 15 july 07 - 1553 CDT i forgot to mention another thing that i've been doing lately - weight loss. (= i am fat. like, not 'a bit chubby' or 'rubenesque.' it's not 'just left-over baby-fat,' and i'm not 'pleasantly plump.' (well, maybe the last one is true, but whatever.) =P i don't say the dreaded three-letter-word (omgomg!!!) out of anger, spite, sadness, or any other ill-sounding descriptive noun. it simply is what it is, and if i never change, i'll have to - and do - accept that. a bit of backstory, though: since going on 'the pill!!![dundunDUNNNN]', i've gained weight. i also stopped focusing so much on what i was eating. i've been 'bigger' since many years, just as much by my own doing as well as heredity, but the pill really pushed me overboard. so my 'p-nat' size is a 20/22, my shirt a 20 (damn DD boobs). though i -am- proportionate (the weight's distributed evenly, not just in the ass/thighs or what have you), i'm not particularly healthy. i convinced a friend of mine, who is both pant & shirt size 22 (aka very similarly constructed, heh), to work on losing weight with me. (though i've not set an ultimate 'time' goal, i -have- set a size and weight goal.) so far, it's been going very well - my p-nats are wearing more loosely, and my energy level is UP^^ by quite a bit, as is my mood. i am very excited about this, especially since i am establishing healthy lifestyle habits, as opposed to fad-dieting &c. i've changed my outlook from seeing everything as 'the depths of hell' to being truly happy and contented with all the things living has to offer (which includes acceptance of the bad things, taking them instead as opportunities to learn). one part of choosing happiness is being healthy, so it's just another step forward. if any of you are interested in the progress, let me know and i'll post it. (=

phew, we've been engaged only a few days, and already the pressure is starting to build! his family and my family and my co-workers are all asking if we've a date set (no, not yet) and where we plan to get married (still working on that, too). i shouldn't be so easily frazzled, but with the temperature being sosobloodyHOTºF, i tend to become quite irritable. i'm inside with the a/c running now, though, so i'm feeling better. heh. i really don't mind being asked questions, to be honest; however, when the temperature rises, i seem to turn into this succubus or something. i don't even feel like myself when this happens, but whatevah. being in wisconsin, it fortunately doesn't come up too often. anyhow. the huzzy-to-be and i are, for those of you currently unaware, working on moving to europe. we were initially aiming for march or april of 2008; now that we've a wedding to plan, the date may move a month or two later; still, we're both quite excited about this. this is a great age to do it, and we're both ready and willing. our initial idea was to get married IN europe at (or near) a castle. while still a very appealing option, we're not sure of the costs or terms & conditions, and we're thinking it might be better to be hitched -before- relocating. additionally, we can always renew our vows when we get there, which would be just as nice. (and getting to wear my wedding dress more than once? awesome.) mum rang this morn to tell me she booked a chapel at a historical site here, so we may do that on 2 may and go to europe afterward. soooo. some of you (meaning SARAH ;]) have expressed interest in the details. keep in mind that we tend to be 'quirky' people, heh. without further ado, here it is. i apologise in advance for it being a long read. thursday night, after work, i went to visit with amanda, an awesome friend of mine. i rang michael to ask if he wanted to join, and he seemed a bit preoccupied and kind of disappointed. after discussing things a bit, i agreed to be out for only an hour. (he isn't much of a planner, so i was definitely curious.) he made it clear that i should come home on an empty stomach, too. i told amanda about this, and she said, 'ooh, he's gonna give you a ring!' i quickly brushed it off, but she was right after all, heh. i'd mentioned in the past (quite some time ago) that i thought it would be fun to go on a 'date' again, ie. pick me up at home and take me out to dinner or wherever else. he must have a great memory, cos when i got home, he wasn't there; after a few minutes, i heard a knock at the door, opened it, and he was standing there. i was like, 'uh . . you can come in, you know.' [with a giggle] 'i'm here for our date.' (awww) so i let him in; he walked round a bit and said, 'i like your cat. what's his name?" (how cute is THAT?) then we left, and he took me to the seabird restaurant (very upscale, so i was a bit curious). we had an excellent meal of things we could barely pronounce, and it had been storming over the lake, so it looked really awesome outside. however, we finished our meal, and . . . no ring. of course it wasn't going to happen; i knew i shouldn't have gotten my hopes up. i asked if he'd had anything else in mind, and he suggested going for a walk along the lake. despite having rained just before we got there, it was really nice out and everything was lit up. we started talking about all sorts of things, including possible marriage in the future (i was under the impression of it not happening for awhile) and it was very enjoyable. anyhow, we got to the end of the walking path, and we stopped on the pier for a bit. regarding a question he'd asked, i'd made a comment about engagement being a symbol of the strong committment and love two people have for one another, so he took it upon himself to use that as a cue to pull out the ring. (= it was a really beautiful thing - the ring was (is) gorgeous, there was lightning over the lake, and the air still smelled like rain. and the look on mike's face was the best part of it all; i could tell he was completely ready for the moment. of course, i said yes and gave him a gi-normous hug and lots of kissies and grinned like an idiot for the rest of the night. it was wonderful. we told our parents on saturday and made it public afterward. my parents seem very happy about this, and i think his parents feel pretty good about it, too. (= anyhow. now that i've given you practically a novella, i think it's time to go for the night. hope everyone is doing well, and thank you, awesome friends, for being in our lives - we appreciate all of you!!! (=

it happened. (HELL YES, i will!) (=

i was bored at work yesterday, so i did this: with lots of sharpie markers. today, i fixed the 'sand' and rounded out the coconut a bit (took the pic last night), but it's pretty much done - unless my picky self notices anything else i mustmust fix. anyhow. enjoy the pretty colours, heh. (i'll post a real entry later, just wanted to share this now.) [update - 22 july 07 - 2350 CDT] i'd post a new entry, but i'll have to do that tomorrow or so; i need sleep! rofl just wanted to add an update on the 'weight loss front' - checked the scale today, and i've lost about 20lbs since i started two weeks ago! woo-hoo! (=

my head's in the clouds

this weekend was . .. busy as hell. never underestimate the stupidity and arrogance of people in large groups. i'll elaborate later as i've got a migraine, but it wasn't -all- bad, just frustrating at times. word to the wise: if a security officer kindly tells you not to act like a dipshit, please take the advice. hope everyone had a fabulous weekend - and have an even better week! (= ps. since there has been such a tremendous gap in between the last time i wrote regularly and now, feel free to ask any questions you wish. [edit] man, i am such a suh-lacker, even after all these years. actually, i've just been very busy lately. worked all last weekend, then went on a two-day road-trip to the mall of america. (cheesy? perhaps, but mike hadn't been there before and we could only go so far due to time constraints.) i can't really say too much about last weekend, other than the fact that most crotch-rocket riders are spoilt, arrogant, frat-boy-types that become increasingly so year after year. and respect for others? forget that - they don't know what the hell the word even means. i love my security job, but one weekend in particular just gets worse every year. we even get the sheriff's dept in to help with the 'animals' and still people are regularly hauled off in ambulances or handcuffs (or both). aside from that, things are going well enough. i'm glad it's the weekend. and work is finally improving as much as it's capable of; 'the bitch supervisor' found another job, so things have been much more relaxed since her departure. the home improvements should apparently be done before the start of july, so i'm looking forward to 'tikis on the roof!' heh. hope everyone has a terrific weekend! [end edit: 9 june 07 - 0023 CDT]

now that registration has been re-opened, i've decided to change over to another diary. i've actually been meaning to do this for awhile, but reg closed back up before i could do so last time. anyhow, the new url is: http://www.sitdiary.net/pyroclasticlux i will still keep this one open so i can access previous entries; as well, i'm a bit of a pack-rat and have the hardest time getting rid of pretty much anything. i wonder if scott's ever going to update the anniversary list; i'm curious when i actually started this one. heh. the past few years have brought a lot of changes, and i'd like to get a 'fresh start,' so to speak. (= anyhow. see you over there, i hope!

i am feeling better once again. i've been quite sick lately and was getting really quite annoyed by it, but it seems things are back to normal. there are a lot of things to plan for lately, including a possible move to a new flat. i really hope we get it. water, heat, central air, garbage disposal, gas, and security services are included (we'd only pay electricity), there is a dishwasher (novelty, but definitely a plus), and it's beautiful, if smaller than the one we're in now. it's got 13' cathedral ceilings, lots of light, and an open kitchen. it'll be more than we're paying now, rent-wise - $520 per month vs our current $465 - but we currently have to pay for everything ourselves aside from water, so we'll at least break even, if not save a bit. we're waiting to get the approval; if everything goes well, we'll move in round the 1st of november. (= aside from that, we're going to be planning our european trip in better detail as soon as we're able. i'm hoping we can start this week or weekend; my parents will be able to help, i'm sure, since they've been to many of the places we want to visit. we've got an entire month to spend there, though, so i'd like to have a few things set up before we arrive. news on the weight-loss end: i've lost 30 lbs so far and both a pant and shirt size. it feels pretty cool so far, and i'm confident i can keep it going. (= that's really about all for now. hope everyone is doing well!