Wow. Can you believe it? Reality has finally hit me and hit me hard. Recently, I just figured out that I have a crush on a guy named Alex. If that wasn't weird enough it gets better. Alex is the best friend of one of my best friends crushs. Dear God someone help me. Wanna hear the best part? I'm a coward. I can't ask him out or anything with this low opinion I have of myself. So now I've offically made myself a deal. When I have a flat stomach and a decent ass, I will tell him that I like him and possibly ask him out. Believe me, for me this is a monumental decision. Even so, there is no way I'll go alone. I'll bring Keara or Chrissy with me for moral support. And so I don't feel totally stupid when he says no. At some point this year, this desire for a decent butt and stomach will come true. Here is what I'm doing. A.) The Special K diet B.) 30 minutes of pilates every morning. That's gotta do something for me, right? And if not...I might just have to resort to more desperate measures. Meh. I'll go on to describe my day for you. This morning I had FCA (fellowship of Christian Athletes, though oddly enough there aren't many atheletes in the group...). We meet once a week for a bible study type thing at McDonalds. I had a cappacino and thats it. Yay for me. Now from there, I shall describe my different moods throughout the day. Yay! Creative Writing: Creative Physics:Confused Drama: Overwhelmed World Lit: Bored Aiding: More Bored AP English:Frantic Novels: Ready to leave school From there, I got on my school bus, where I rocked back and forth with the music flowing from my cd player...until The Fourth Stop. Which is where I picked up my current mood. If it wasn't bad enough that I have a crush on Alex... I haven't completly let go of my crush on Dillion. Have I neglected to mention Dillion in my past entries? Well... He's a really super cute goth who rode my bus and was in my Newspaper class that was always nice to me and was treated badly by most people. Why I liked him...I dunno. In fact, I can't even tell you why I like Alex...except maybe for the fact that hes also super cute and funny? Sigh. Now back to my mood story. At The Fourth Stop...I saw Dillion again. Which is when I started feeling awfully twitchy. Well...not just me. More like my heart. It seems to speed up just a little bit and then send a shiver down my spine. Okay...it doesn't just speed up. It literally jumps into my throat. It's like a tickling sensation. It's...I can't really describe it well enough. All I know is that between this whole Dillion and Alex thing... I feel twitchy. On a side note...do you think its stalkerish if I accompany a friend to the alla carte (spelled wrong I'm sure)line just to stand a little bit closer to the guy I like? Cause yeah. I did that. Today. *hides* Mandy