I am fighting with meself. I want to get in the msn, but I remember me crying yesterday, than I say "NO". let them see how it is when I get angry and hurt, because I have a heart too. I am a good listener, but I need to be listened sometimes, and people don't consider that fact. I am sick of being hurt. it is enough. if they want me as a friend, let them fight for that. it is simple to be my friend...just try understanding me and don't be such an egoist. fucking life is this...isn't it?

I haven't write for awhile. I am so busy that I forget about meself. i hate that, but what to do. I am at work. write now I don't have much things to do, and I gave meself a break to write a little. I have a headache, a very bad one. I should drink a coffe right now, but I wont do that, because than I have problems with my empty stomach hehehehehe. I haven't ate much today. Hey I have great news, I got in the university. I will study psychology. I will start in october, can't wait I start attending the lessons. it's been three years from my first and last try to get in heheheh, so this is my second time. no other news in my life, everything is the same like it was the last time I wrote. this is it! bye..kiss

I hate people with high self opinion, and they don't have any reason for that. Ok, you have a high opinion for yourself, but you can't be a jurk. I have a very good opionion about meself, that is ok, but acting like you are very important, I hate that. I have this guy working with me, he is a total idiot. he is here for two months, and he can give me comands...hellooooo....no chance budy. I would crash him. I really hate him, and not just him, his colleague also. they both are jurks. anyway...I wont let some stupid guys ruin my nerves......sooooooo.....fuck them all. bye bye my diary...thx for listening.

Yesterday it was my birthday. I had a great birthday.....it's been a long time since I had this kind of birthday. thx to all of people...all were great. this is all my diary...I am very tired to write more

I don't know what to think. nobody gets me, they don't understand me at all.....oh listen to me, I am saying it like it's something new. it was always like that. I hate that people who knows me act like they don't know me at all, or they don't think about the things I hate them to do. sometimes I want to shout at them and say "stop that, you can't do things like that..do you ever think what I feel?"......but than again,just let it go, it will pass, like it always did ("lie"-it never passes). I learned to hide it somewhere in me. I have plenty of things inside there. Because of you I never strayed too far from the sidewalk Because of you I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt Because of you I find it hard to trust not only me, but everyone around me Because of you I am afraid

I don't know how I feel, I have mixed feelings inside, but the one that wins is Sadness. I always feel like this on valentines day. i don't know what happened to this people, you can smell valentine everywhere....wierd. Suddenly everybody are in love..... :s. should I feel bad about this? I don't care...let it go, tonight at midnight it will end *devilish smile*. I got a flower today...from the bank where I have my account...horrible. I wish happy valentine to the lovers....happy valentine sis

I hate when I feel like this. I feel so down, so depressed, so like crying. I hate to feel left alone...I want people to see me, to see that I am there. why do people ignore that...am I to....I don't have words to explain. I am bad on writing my feelings. I will just post the song that I am listening. From underneath the trees, we watch the sky Confusing stars for satellites I never dreamed that you'd be mine But here we are, we're here tonight Singing Amen, I'm alive Singing Amen, I'm alive [CHORUS] If everyone cared and nobody cried If everyone loved and nobody lied If everyone shared and swallowed their pride We'd see the day when nobody died And I'm singing Amen I, I'm alive Amen I, I'm alive And in the air the fireflies Our only light in paradise We'll show the world they were wrong And teach them all to sing along Singing Amen I'm alive Singing Amen I'm alive [CHORUS (X2)] And as we lie beneath the stars We realize how small we are If they could love like you and me Imagine what the world could be If everyone cared and nobody cried If everyone loved and nobody lied If everyone shared and swallowed their pride We'd see the day when nobody died We'd see the day, we'd see the day When nobody died We'd see the day, we'd see the day When nobody died We'd see the day when nobody died

I don't know where my head is......Very busy!

sa e keqe jam kur te shkon Kaltro dikund, menjehere behem shume sad, ja tash tu shkrujt e kom bo facen ashtu si peshk :(, mka marr malli per kiken teme.....une po thom qe kam me shku diku jasht me jetu, po nuk e di se qa kom me bo kur te ndahemi. kur te shkoj une dikund, dhe ajo kur te martohet une me duket kam me ju bo tullusum veq ne tel tu e thir.nuk po du me kon qishtu, po jam, dhe skam qa me bo. tash kaltro ne kete kohe duhet me qene tu u taku me asdrenin dhe nisen per ne shtepi. ishalla veq kalon shume mire...ishalla knaqet. une qitash jam ne pune dhe po ngoj muzik, po punoj, po i kryj do pune qitu. po dume plas pse nuk kemi pushim te henen si te gjith, po jo na nuk bone me pas pushim se bohet nomi. C'est si stupide......pourquoi ne peut pas travailler soit plaisir?

Now I feel better, I think that I convinced myself that others shouldn't have influence on me. I am at work, just sitting and doing nothing, cuz I'm a little bit lazy today. I was thinking about meself and my luck with guys. All the sweet guys that like me, and I like them, are in relation with somebody else or engaged or married....so this means neither of them is for me.oh I forgot to mention one other guy...he is my friend. I know, I know that is not a problem, but .......I don't know what to think. He is so nice and everything, he is like perfect for me, but still.......oh I don't know what to think....just leave it like it is.

I am surrounded with stupid people, I am even more stupid that I let them make me angry. just ignore them, the best thing I can do. my boss is so fucked up...I hate him from the bottom of my heart. I can't wait to get an opportunity and run away from here. Oh God help me be strong....I want to see the bright side of the things like I used to. motra shpresoj se nuk je tu u bajatav, a najsen qashtu...mpuqe

everywhere is white....it's snowing. I love the snow! city looks like a postcard..the trees are so beautiful. everything looks beautiful when it snows. It was a nice day today....I had fun, and I felt very nice for many reasons. hope it will last....

une me te vertet spo muj me besu qysh disa njerez mendojn. he really thought that he can do anything if he meets me. this shows how much he knows me....he really is stupid, more than I imagened. I felt angry two hours ago, but now that I told him everything I mean, I feel better, I am released. now even if I see him in the street I wont bother hiding just to not talk to him. I can freely pass near him and not say a word, not even look at him. he is just an asshole for me.....big shit!

It is snowing outside! In this time of year I get very nostalgic. I miss my home, our flat. We had a great time there. I was younger but I remember how it felt. Whenever I think of our flat I feel like crying. I am at work at this moment and can't wait to go home, cuz tomorrow I am at home....finally a free day. hope I will have a nice weekend. Oh Zot tash edhe pak vjen viti i ri, dhe une po e ndiej veten shume weird si gjithmon. Eshte nje ndjenje e mire dhe e keqe ne te njejten kohe. Edhe po ndihem shume e lumtur edhe pikellushem. I guess qajo eshte qka bejne festat.

I am at work! brother of my boss just came in, and he told us a terrible thing, one man was shot in the center of town. how can people do things like this. how can they be so cruel. Today everything is so creepy, I just hope that this day wont end bad. I'm just sitting here, doing my work, and feeling, angry and sad in the same time. Oh God.....help me!

I'm at work, and I want to relax a little, cuz I really can't take all these things coming to me in a minute. They think that I am kind a super girl....SUPRISE...I'm not! I almost finished some papers, and my boss told me that I should register them with other date...that means I have to do the same work once again...idiotic. Plus...I have stomach aches...very annoying.

I'm just sitting here right now, cuz I don't have anything to do. I am happy today, cuz the bank permited the credit I asked for. I have to go at 2.30pm to sign the contract. Finally something good is happening. I hope that today I wont have much work, I don't feel like working. Today snowed much more, the streets are almost all white. I love when it snowes a lot, then the streets look like postcard. The snow makes me feel so weird, confused, happy and sad, all in the same time. To bad that I am in the office withou windows where I can watch the snow falling down. Kaltrina can...lucky she. Hey sis I bet that you are feeling nostalgic and happy right now. love ya sis....

Hello there my diary! I'm new here and it's weird to write diary in my PC, cuz I'm used with notebook. I'm at work right now, and I am really tired, it was a busy and messy day. ok I don't know what to write else, I am very busy, I just want it to make my first entry.