Something is wrong when a person doesn't ever want to use a phone again, at least I think so. But that's how it is, I don't care to use a phone ever again. You see I am a shut in, agoraphobic, won't leave the house ect ect ect I don't like how my life is, in fact I hate it but the medications aren't working and I'm lucky if I can remember to take them all right. I don't have a therapist at the moment and even if I did I probably wouldn't show up for the appointments. Because I'm a shit in it doesn't mean I don't have things. I have a shitload of movies, a huge cd collection, I have daily habits and routines like everyone else in the world does. I attempted to take my sister out for Halloween but I only made it a few blocks before I was out of breath half do to my medication half because I wanted to be back inside. Staring at all those people handing out candy scared the living shit out of me. Hearing "Trick or treat" "Smell my feet give me something good to eat" "Happy Halloween" "Thankyou" and "Your welcome" was odd to my ears. But, nevermind that. I had this diary for awhile now so I thought that I would use it to express how my life is as I live and deal with my mental illness.