hey my life is going to crap ... yea. today is saturday and I have a game later today - home around 6ish Yesterday was ok ... NOT! Actually, yesterday was the worst day of my life! I spent pretty much the whole day crying and noone noticed - I guess I have gotten pretty good at hiding my emotions!! Its all started in 1st period civics when I got my report card ... use you imagination on the one! Then in french 2nd period I was ok ... sorry to the ppl in 2nd period - I was pretty cranky! But then 3rd period I totally lost it! I was trying to take an algebra test but I couldnt concentrate because some ppl were tapping their feet and then I couldnt see thru my tears ... I had no idea what I was doing with all those freakin formulas and stuff! So I asked the teacher and he tried to explain it to me and when he was done he goes "did you follow that?" and I was just like "nope!" and I went and sat down and skipped about 8 problems. Then there was multiple choice and I guessed on that ... guess who probably failed that one!! But that isnt what made my day crap ... none of my "friends" noticed that I was crying. (except dan - thanks dan your great! ) Then 4th period I kept to myself in Swimming ... people kept trying to get out of me what was wrong but they werent the people I wanted to ask me. So I wrote in the notebook between a few people and I and now I have to rip our what I wrote because if they read it it will make everything worse. So I hafta get rid of that now. Then we had a free period and we had an assembly. TOTAL DISASTER! I couldnt find a few certain people I wanted to sit with so I waited with Sami while she was waiting for her b/f (Dan) - then those othr ppl were like right behind them so I was walkin in front of everyone else cuz the halls were really crowded. THen 3 ppl got hudled into a little group with their backs toward me - so i figured they didnt want me to hear what they were saying (cuz it was probably about me) so I turned around and started talkin to Sami and Dan and then I turned around and those 3 ppl were already walin into the auditorium together and gettin seated ... so I sat with Sami N Dan! 3 ppl got mad I guess. after the assembly I had English with 1 -out of the- 3 ... she didnt say 2 words to me. When the bell rang to go to lunch I waited for person1 to get her stuff together and then I turned to walk with her and she just stormed out in front of me and didnt say a word to me. So, I walked with Sami to lunch. I went to go sit at my lunch table and I felt pretty damn invisible so when everyone left without sayin 2 words to me I went and sat and Sam's table. So now 3ppl are mad at ME for sitting with another "cheerleader friend" .. whatever. THen 9th period we had a study hall for band and people 2+3 were there too. I was sittin there really bored so I went to my locker to get my cd player and when I got back person 2 was in german room and 3 was still in band room. So I sat there by myself and didnt talk to anyone because 3 was walkin around with someone else and not even acting like I was alive. So whatever. Then I had practice and then I went home on late bus and got home. Got home, did my chores then got online. Got online and got told that I was turning into something that I said I wouldnt. I was told that I dont care about anyone else and that I think I am better than everyone else. person 1 is mad at me because I was someone elses partner for a game in English, 2 and I are all better now, and 3 and I are .. well ... nevermind - because I have no idea. So yea ... yesterday was QUITE shitty! well .. gotta go and straighten up the house a bit ... leave the comments and say what you want to - dont beat around the bush dont sugarcoat it ... cuz Im not playing anymore guessing games. just say it. Courtney*