Another Poem to Critic

Well, here is another poem. tear it apart, do what you want. If you steal it, I'll kill you then sue you. And that is about all. We'll miss you to all the seniors who left our creative writing class! You were all like big sisters to me! Piercing radiant knife Take away my life Blood seeps, I fade Sweet kissing blade The shadows of men all frown All the life is seeping, running down My darkness hides in fright Under the guiding night An A tune gives out a sigh Flashes of life pass me by The twilight that I'll never see A mirror that never shows me Winding souls circle the ceiling My dreams are scared until I lose all feeling Outstretched hands all reach otu wide Until this piercing knife reaches my side I fall away into the vessel of Styx I promise that ll my mistakes were fixxed Reaching up, don't let me die Please don't let this chance pass me by This hand welcomes this single cut Leading to the land of the dead, but.. Am i ready to recieve my initiation? When I am dead, will I still have my dedication? My eyes open wide The bats all give out a sigh A red velvet covers my clothes See this play come to a close
Read 2 comments
We'll miss you too Jamahl.
[Anonymous]
i really like this poem, it stand out against your other ones. it probably isnt my favorite of your poems, but it is really good.

tAtE
[Anonymous]