I don't want to do this anymore. I don't want to work. I never did. I want to be able to sit at home and think about Jenna. I want to sit around and dream about what has happened. I want to lay upside down on my bed and think about my future with her. I want to sit in random spots in my house and try to count all the ways that I love her. I want to do nothing but be with her. My motivation is you. I love you. When I am with you you make me feel like a important guy. You make me feel like a person. I feel like I could live forever, just sitting near you. Even if we aren't touching. Even if you don't notice that I am even there. I love you. I feel wonderful. I love hearing what you have to say. Even if it doesn't come out right. I love seeing you. Even if we are halfway across the lunchroom. But I know, today I watched you sitting there. With your friends. I saw your face. You had a slight smile and then it faded. I turned to a frown and I saw the whole thing happen. But yet I was stupid and did nothing. I am sorry I didn't go to you. I am sorry. If you can not forgive me, I understand. I am sorry. Perhaps i will come and sit by you on Monday. That would be nice.