I finally got White Oleander from the bookstore today but I can't bring myself to read it because every time I listen to this song I feel more sad and sick to my stomach and I want to cry because no one's ever ever ever ever going to love me, but for some reason I can't. It's probably for a similar reason that I cannot stop listening to this song. So lonely. So fucking fucking fucking lonely. Let's overuse that word a bit more, shall we? LONELY. LONELY. LONELY. Lonely tally: 6. You have my permission to go ahead and screw that 'i can't cry' thing because I am. All I want for christmas is a soul.