fuck....fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck. i ALWAYS blow it..i ALWAYS blow it.ok look ..man tha gurl that i wus havin problems wit b4..i just dont talk 2 her at ALL..which as much as it hurts i think is the best decision. but it didnt matter that much cuz i had sumthin else on my mind or someone else. well me and this gurl were REALLY close to going out a while ago but shyt happened but i forgave her because once AGAIN..i STILL thought i had a chance wit her like a fuckin retard and i tried to give her my heart but AGAIN i ended up realizing it wouldnt happen...after a while of talkin on the phone wit her we ended up talkin about us goin out and she ONCE AGAIN said "idk right now".....that shit RIGHT there just fuckin reminded me of the FIRST time i got played by tha SAME chick and ALSO the 1st gurl that liked me "SO MUCH" but rejected me everytime i asked her out..well if this has ever happened to u you KNOW how it feels and how much that shit fuckin hurts so i just told her not to talk to me anymore .....idk....its the right decision for me not to get hurt but ITS TOO LATE....i feel i need this gurl and she doesnt consider me her type. they BOTH like boys that do them wrong and i cant do that so.....idk. all i kno is om not gonna change myself for sum1 else to like me so fuck it fuck them and fuck everything else that goes against that shit..it just fuckin hurts to have that shit done to you THREE TIMES!!!...IT DONT FEEL GOOD and knowing that both them can just hang up wit me or walk away from me feelin good about it all just fuckin makes all this shit worse......fuck it....if thats how th fuckin world is then idc...fuck you and fuck everything that reminds me of you....i hate you