I scare myself. I think I know myself, then I see a brand new side of me. And then I confuse myself cos none of it fits together. So, I'm the kind of person who likes to close the door on the world, be by myself, sorgt my owns problems out and live my own life. I love to drift off into daydreams and I long for those hours that I can spend daydreaming uninterupted. And those daydreams are mine and I never share them with anyone. But then I have loads of friends (well, it seems like that to me) and I enjoy being with them (most of the time). And I love spending my free time with them (as aposed to school time) which makes no sense But although I have loads of friends, I don't feel that I have any close friends. I look around and everyone seems to have one or two people who they tell everything, and I feel like an outsider. And thats what I long for: a soulmate. But I don't see me ever having one. I can see tonight being one of those nights when I cry myself to sleep. Not because I'm sad, not because I'm insecure or anything like that, I just get so confused. It's strange, I can never normally cry, but every month or so I just start and can't stop. I guess I do see crying as a weakness, but I also believe that it is only when I am weak that Christ makes me strong. So I feel that maybe I should cry more often (how wierd am I?) xxx PS Remeber: 'Don't worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself' Matthew chapter 6 verse 34