it kind of made me feel weird when a girl at work took pity on me because i dont have a boyfriend. she kept giving me the third degree on it too and i never even felt like talking to her in the first place. doesnt that make you really sad? no. i guess it would be nice to have a handsome man say "atta girl" and touch my chin or something. (is that weird?) but i havent really thought about it. and if i wanted action theres always decent looking male sluts available. i havent met a guy who i want to be my boyfriend, why would i do something out of boredom? thats lame i did that already and it only goes so far. its weird too because its not dramatic when theres something there because im so introverted, but when theres vacancy drama happens because i dont know what else to do to keep myself ineracting with them. so i dont really feel like playing house its a pointless distraction. anyways its my saturday and ive deep conditioned my hair and done a mask and watched an entire season of americas next top model and i feel like such a sloth. if i party tonight theres a good chance ill sloth it tomorrow too. ill probably do what i always end up doing..finally get out sunday afternoon and then stay out untill 4 in the morning like i shouldnt. i hate this rough financial spot where i see nothing of what i make because all im doing is paying off debts. i guess it'll be over soon and its getting me into the idea that im a volunteer worker so ill probably save better when the money is mine. i was thinking about getting a credit card but i dont know where to start. i dont think visa or any of those big companies will accept me because i have no credit history. is it worth it though? even if you pay on time there are fees right?