I wish I could convince myself to think that an entry a month is enough. But it truly is not. A lot has happened with the whole nicole and byron thing...at this point i'm kinda just over it....idk how i feel about it. but i do know that i love hanging with nicole and her friends. i'm really glad i know people outside of my little group and i feel that that's only gonna keep growing as i progress through school. Hmm. i'm so over school, which is terrible to think i know. but i'm so ready for summer. it's unbelievable...I'm starting to worry a little about my chicago trip but i do know that it will be a great experience and i'm sure i'll have tons of fun. I had dinner with which was really nice! She was talking about living close to eachother next year and also living at the beach junior year. i think that would be sooooo fun. i'm really down, i just hope my parents are ya know?!?! okay lauren wants her computer back so i gotta go but i'm going to blog a bit deeper next time!!! :) I LOVE YOU! XOXO Camilla Creme

dear diary, oh how it has been a long time. i'm terribly sorry for any trouble i may have caused you in not explaining what my life has consisted of these past few months. last time i blogged i believe i had gone to see JB at the stevie wonder event--which was cool--but definitely not as cool as seeing Nick Jonas in concert in january. I had gone home for a month (end of december through end of january). It was so amazing to be back home with all my friends and family, but i'm glad we had to return when we did. everyone continued to live their life and i was just home alone with nothing to do, which don't get me wrong was really nice : ). Anyway, when i returned to school it was time to see NICK : ) which btw was AMAZINGG!!! I've got pictures but maybe i'll post them some other time. I got to see BIG ROB in person (he like stood right next to me) and Selena Gomez :/ickkk. And some other really cool celebs as well. Anyway it was experience that I will cherish for life! Since then, I've been working on my second semester of college, still great but a little stressful and overwhelming. I play NICK JONAS' cd on replay ALL the time :) (it's soooo great) and his single STAY comes out next tuesday. Also, in about a week I get to go on my spring break! I'm going home for my birthday and super excited for the trip that awaits. ow that i've got you up to date i should probably go do some homework : ). ♥, Camilla Creme p.s. i stole : ) from Nick J's tweets, he's such a cutie!

I don't have much to say. I'm just extremely exhausted and really upset. I have no idea why, it kinda just hit me. And I don't want to do anything but cry. I don't even know why I'm writing this entry, because I honestly don't have anything to say. but to ramble and type about this. i just got back from portland today, and i'm really bummed. i want to go back. I know I'll be there in three weeks. but still... something's missing. and i just found out about Nick J's new cd...it comes out in february, i should be stoked. plus i get to see them in two weekends. but i'm just in the slums. it could be because it's sunday. that's probably why. and i just miss everyone. well goodnight. xoxo, Camilla Creme

dear diary, do you realize it's saturday? do you know what that means? it means in three days i get to return home. it's been about three months since i've seen everyone. including my brother and sister! i'm still so excited. i can't believe it's here! :] i was just browsing on forever 21's website...i wish i had money to buy clothes.. i've got such a weakness for it. but then i think about it and we need to stop consuming! so i should be buying used clothing! i also realized that i've got a real weakness for floral prints as well. i found the cutest shirt, but it's sooo expensive. and i already bought my OC second season...so i've got to save up for third season. and i should probably just stop spending money all together. let's see what will i accomplish today? -clean my room -vacuum it. -do my laundry -start to pack? -complete all my hw: engr, calc, spanish, maybe some chem, chem lab. -more O.C.! alright, well it's almost 9:30 and I'm pretty sure i'm not gonna get back to bed. sooo i'll start my day :) kinda motivated, Camilla Creme

dear diary, I like the way that sounds. I know I should be doind my engineering homework, but I thought I'd type a little some some before I get back to my studious night. haha right. Well today I lost my i.d. card, but the lord was on my side; get this, the priest took it back to the information desk aha. mm. let's see, what else?! exactly one week until i get to see my beautiful home. i cannot explain my excitement for this event! I am trying to study/take this test for chemistry serious, but the fact that i get rewarded by going home, just throws me off entirely. effff hybridization! no lie. I've decided I really like the way the italic looks, so i've decided to continue it in this entry. Anyway, I should get to my service learning reflection. it's just a night for reflection ehhh?! Haha. wishing the o.c. second season comes in tomorrow, camilla creme

dear diary, one day i will learn how to study for a test well in advance of the actual test day. one day, i will learn how to keep my mouth shut. one day i will learn to not sit and watch The O.C. for four hours; especially in one sitting. one day, I will learn to go to sleep at a reasonable hour. yeah yeah yeah, one day. i will. happy birthday "Dan the Man," here's to 5 years of a roller-coaster ride and many more to come. writing with thankfulness and a stuffy nose, Carmen

Top 100 reasons why you should go to USD: 1. The sunsets never get old. 2. Carmen Chavez, Lauren Infusino, and Kellie Ringstad attend the school/you'd get to see our beautiful faces everyday. 3. The beach is less than seven minutes away. 4. Regardless of the outing, there is always an anthem to be played from the iPod. 5. Pit Bull must be danced to, particularly in the car. 6. You're practically going to school at a country club here. 7. Frozen yogurt 24/7. 8. We're 2 hours from L.A. 9. The Pacific Ocean can be seen from almost anywhere on campus. 10. Bragging rights. 11. It's always safe to assume it's going to be 70 and sunny. 12. You have "perfect beach days" in November. 13. You'd go to school with Kellie Ringstad. 14. There are In-N-Out's on every corner. 15. It's not hard finding a good mexican restaurant. 16. Sea World is down the hill. 17. Surfing. 18. We live where most spring break. 19. Little Italy. 20. You can get anywhere in a car within 20 minutes. 21. Karaoke lounges. 22. Conveniently located between the 5 and the 8. 23. Trams will take you to Old Town. 24. Fashion Valley is down the street. 25. La Paloma for breakfast/lunch everyday is killer. 26. Classes are small. 27. Drunk skateboarders and/or surfers. 28. SDSU and UCSD parties are too close to resist. 29. An abundance of tattoo parlors are open late. 30. There is a plethora of underage clubs. 31. Pilfering food from the SLP--entertaining and you get your money's worth. 32. Cheap parking downtown. 33. pho and vietnamese food 34. OC procrastination sessions 35. hella 36. creeper kellie 37. Sushi!! 38. 39. 40. 41. 42. 43. 44. 45. 46. 47. 48. 49. 50. 51. 52. 53. 54. 55. 56. 57. 58. 59. 60. 61. 62. 63. 64. 65. 66. 67. 68. 69. 70. 71. 72. 73. 74. 75. 76. 77. 78. 79. 80. 81. 82. 83. 84. 85. 86. 87. 88. 89 90. 91. 92. 93. 94. 95. 96. 97. 98. 99. 100. 11/17 More to come. kay thanks, bye. xoxo, camilla creme

Dear you, Today I had a good day. Well rounded one actually, but I had practically four nightmares out of four naps that were taken today. I don't know what that was about but it spooked me out a lot. After my naps I went to CPK with the girls and had a great meal. Then we went shopping and I bought some jeans at Hollister. I got buyer's remorse but hopefully I'll like them so much that I'll get over it. ya know?! I was supposed to go with the girls to the club, but I didn't really want to spend anymore money than I already have today, so i figured I'd stay in tonight. I'm sitting in Lo's room watching Eternal Sunshine, waiting for sel and lise i think to get back from getting their food....then we'll skype. I really hope Lynda doesn't come in here, even though I know she really does. Gonna go, gotta watch this movie, and my arms awkward. night night. ♥ xoxo, camilla creme

Ahh, I love my new colors they look very awesome and I'm super excited about them. Lo picked 'em out for me :]. I can't remember the last time I changed the colors but I really like it, as I said. So today was Bike To School day and I'm a little upset. 1) I woke up extremely early to find no one setting up breakfast, nor anywhere it could've possibly been. 2) I did not get a shirt. I sure hope next week's event is way better than this one. I don't have much to say considering I blogged yesterday, or at least I think I did. If not, the day before that. I am supposed to go to Kellie's room now that it's one but I'll probably finish this entry then head over there... Let me listt.... 1) Finish spanish hw/study for quiz 2) Plan out foundation of schedule for next semester 3) Look up classes 4) Write finalized proposed schedule for meeting with Gurak on fri. 5) Call gramps/dad? 6) Chemistry reading and/or work on quiz Okay now that I've prioritized let's see is there any thing else I need to discuss in this entry? Not really, just kinda bummed about B2S like I said...It's already wednesday the week is going by pretty fast. which is good and bad. good i get to go home. bad i have another test coming up very soon. alright i'm saying the same things over and over so I will leave and talk to Kellie. blogging con mas frecuencia, xoxo camilla creme

Hiiiiii :) So i just legitimately caught a gnat in my hand. i thought that was so amazing i had to blog immediately. currently i am doing spanish homework but i thought to take a break. watching my first season of the oc that i got from amazon, i swear when i finish this i'm gonna get the second season. hopefully i can find it cheap :) haha. i'm so excited it's officially fourteen days till i leave. how CRAZY :]. Tonight i have a date with Lisa to skyyype. excited for that. and bike to school is tomorrow, that should be lots of fun, hopefully i get a shirt. mmm..by the by i am listening to TEB's new cd ursa major. it's pretty good.. but i miss their old stuff. haha. i was gonna see them this thursday but nooooo house of blues has to be 21+ screwwwww that. oh well i'll be seeing JB soon enough. ahhh :) can't wait for that either. life is soooo great i have so many things to look forward to.. that'swhy i should be living in the moment and doing my homework! haha. :) okay blogggggging later, Camilla Creme :]

p.s.s. the brandon posts make me sick to my stomach.... how did i ever enjoy something so gross. alright goodnight. please. :)

I've never got the Sunday haps. But today was a good sunday. Maybe it was because I watched A Little Princess; imagination is key. Maybe it was because I got a high B on my chemistry homework. Maybe it was because I actually understood what I'm supposed to do in lab tomorrow. Maybe it was because I made a study guide weeks (yes weeks before the "test"). Maybe it was because I got to watch six episodes of The O.C. Or maybe it was because I finished all of my homework at a decent hour. Nonetheless, today was a good sunday. Not to mention it was Kilo's 19th birthday. Crazy. Like my Cants said, November is making up for what Halloween did to me. So beautiful. I don't understand how I can tell myself that I'll write in this everyday.. or write in a journal everyday... haha it's ridic. I'm starting to finally get tired so that's good. especially because i have a class at nine tomorrow. i wish jimmy was on right now. but i think i sleep better with the tv off. anyway. 15 days until a very goood day. sorry i got lazy and stopped capitilzing. oh man maroon 5 is so beautiful. Mmmmmkay. time to rest up for a long day. But second to last long monday :). something to be happy about. holy hell it's november ninth. shit. sooooo crazay. okay love live life proceed progress. make sure the neighbors get no rest ;). cool these engines, cool these jets. i love you. very good night. xoxo, camilla creme p.s. i need to call my aunt TOMORROW! because i was freaking supposed to do that this weekend. and i never did.... :(

Surprisingly, I'm actually pretty happy the way that turned out. I fixed a lot of things in there, don't worry :) haha but I liked it. So tonight I went to 8 and 5's game. It was a lot of fun. I cannot wait to hang out with him s'more :) haha. And I got to give Aunt Vicky her present from us (drexler sweater). It was great. So I can't forget to get the paperwork for 16 tomorrow because he's flippin out on me :) bahaha. (btw 16=5) anywhooooo. i just wanted to remind myself of this night. kay thanks. got to go do smore homework. shit load, actually. :) haha. seee yah chicka... xoxo CEEEEVVVV

A lot of things that I didn't think would actually happen in fact have these past four years. I think most of you (seniors) have learned a little bit about who you want to be and if not, who you don't want to be. This is simply because I know I have. And I won't repeat it, since I basically did that in my Rose Festival speech, but Madison staff and students know that my experience here has highly influenced how I plan to lead my life. So, thanks. Now I am a little confused on how exactly I am supposed to say goodbye. Do I leave more advice? Do I reminisce? Am I supposed to thank more people? It has been easy in the past, it was just "see ya." Now, it's not the same. It's uncertain when I will see you next, any of you. So for closure, I will pack my last paragraphs published in The Constitution with Underclassmen hear me out, please don't wish away your years. In journalist Mary Schmich's 1997 column known as the "commencement address she would give if asked to give one," she stated "you will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they have faded." I would like to think that this is not entirely true, and that we take these years for all they are worth--or at least try to. I know it is easy to dismiss these thoughts, but I have hope especially for those of you actually reading this. So in the simplest form, live life happily. This goes for you seniors as well. Not that I should be giving you guys advice since I have plenty of room and time to learn it myself=; but let's promise each other not to worry too much. Let's make a pact not to be reckless with other people's emotions and not let others be reckless with ours. Let's always feel beautiful in our skin and accept ourselves as who we are. Let's be comforting and caring to those who both matter and don't matter. But most certainly, let's never forget where we came from. Congratulations class of 2009.

WARNING: MAY CONTAIN REPETITIVE/NONORIGINAL MATERIAL TO "SAY GOODBYE"-- I never wanted to speak at my graduation. Or never planned to. And I still don't. But in a sense, this is where I get to say all the corny cliches and goodbyes, or farewells. You know, all that good stuff. Here's my que to say "senior class of 2009, our day is here...." and so on. Everyone's counting down the days, and super excited for what awaits, but I've always tried my hardest at remaining happy and content on today. I don't want to wish away the days. I'm trying to limit my "can't waits" because somehow those leave me thinking more about tomorrow and my days go quicker. It seems I don't have enough time in the day to just sit and stare at a wall. Not that I would want to do it. But it's the thought that counts right? Anyway, to sum up: senior year is slipping through my fingers. Everyone's warned me, but I didn't think it would happen. ...TO BE CONTINUED **ROUGH DRAFT

I don't understand why I suck so bad at updating this! I'm working on my APES right now, or at least trying to but I'm distracted by CJ :] haha. or just internet distractions in general. clearing my mind, please excuse: art-finish last painting, final from photo physics-page write up due tomorrow APES-chapter 11,12,and 22 test tomorrow. take 11 and 22 notes and 22 questions AP Calc-worksheet due tomorrow API-haven't seen the fucker in years AP Lit-catch the fuck up (read to 8?) Journalism-rough drafts due tomorrow. edit? again excuse my thoughts and i suppose my french. i took my dress in today to get hemmed, and i guess she's going to make a belt instead of actually sewing on the waistline. whatevski, she's the master. i want to see the finished product now. usually i want weeks to go by slow, but i need more weekend time so i need this week to quicken. it feels like weds, when really it's only monday. i wish i wasn't such a baby when it comes to chattin it up with 16. i think he's free this weekend, i'm thinking maybe a dinner? just us two this time though. idk. we need to speak about $ and ishhhh. usually i type a title, music and mood. but i jumped right in. probably because i'm trying to hurry the hell up so i can get back to my homework. but once i'm away, it's so hard to regain focus. i was so bad tonight. usually i am on monday nights; there's big bang and then DWTS and i just get so sidetracked. fudgesicle. mm sounds good. i need something to snack on, or drink so i can stay up. i'm trying to pull an all-nightie, but my body just can't handle those anymore. hmmmmm. where shall i go? probably back to work. i think music will probably suit my workload better than a movie. yahh. okay music time. see ya chickkk. xoxo CEEEEEEEEV (like ceeeeeeeeej

So I don't know if the whole writing my papers on my blog thing is working or not. But I hope so. I'm sure I'll continue to use it if I don't have juices flowing. Currently, FFE and myspace are under work right now so I can't login to either. Irritating! Haha. But maybe it's for the better because I haven't blogged in a while. Today is the 3rd meaning two days left until I am 18! So so very crazy. Tomorrow is our last judging. I'm starting to get a little more confident in my speech. But I'm losing hope in my chances at winning. I guess we'll just see. I am having my birthday party this Friday! It should be a blast. But also hard work to piece together. No one really knows what to wear (it's 90s themed). But 80s is so overdone... and I'm a 90s baby so it would be fun. Idk we'll see the turnout. I hope it's a good night :] I'm a little sad because last night I stayed home from younglife because I needed to catch up on my work..but I didn't get to ANYTHING! And it was just a very wasteful day. I'm falling wayyyyy too behind in my classes. It's a little frustrating. Okay well I should probably continue getting ready for our field trip today! :] Zenger farm here we come. Hope to blog soon! xoxo, Carmen [still 17 years old]

As we have been split into three different schools over the past years, the entire student body has yet to hear Mr. Musaeus’ spiel to the freshman class. Because it applies to everyone, I feel it is necessary to reiterate the message conveyed in this lesson, and it’s simple: get involved. Can you handle that? Joining a sport (or club, activity, etc.) is always intimidating at first. Even if you aren’t competitive, sports provide several advantages. Getting involved can lessen your insecurities. It also opens the door to new relationships, broadening your social life. Out of the many benefits the most important would have to be the cyclic relationship developed between academics and athletics. When the student is an athlete they become a better student. When the athlete is a student they become a better athlete. In the classroom or out in the act, this connection is evident to most. Because the student is passionate about their sport, they maintain their studies to continue playing. And when the athlete is focused on schoolwork they have a stronger grip on balancing the act, allowing a stronger focus in the sport as well. But—there’s just one but—when this cycle is altered in any way it can create havoc and chaos in the student-athlete’s life. For instance, let’s say the athlete is getting heavily involved in their sport. They practice every day, and the travel home is exhausting so the athlete falls behind and soon enough their grade takes a tumble. So what’s their punishment? Ineligibility. The student-athlete, who once had a working balanced cycle, now has neither pleasant grades nor a sport to relieve stress or turn to. In order to stop this from happening, the student-athlete needs a support system. So, parents, teachers, and coaches listen up as well. Just because we are motivated to go out for a sport or do well in our classes doesn’t mean we don’t need a little kick every now and then. We’re not asking for relief or grace out of pity, just a little guidance in the right direction. Because joining a sport teaches how to balance responsibilities and opens up opportunities to succeed, I highly suggest getting involved now—it’s never too late. And it’s easy! Just log off Myspace, Facebook, or Twitter; then hit the ball, pitch a strike, run a mile or take a shot; and lastly, ask for help when you need the extra boost. Let’s do away with the stereotypes; instead we can combine the nerds and the jocks to make the SuperStudent-Athlete.

To this day, I find that we continue to depersonalize our brothers and sisters. Whether it's because of what they look like, what they practice, who they love, how they act or simply put, for who they are, we are guilty. I haven't found any reason as to why people do this. I can't even admit to any "maybe's" as to why they would. Although I feel this way, I'd have to say that it hadn't truly touched me deeply until I was introduced to Harvey Milk. I've never, not once, felt I was anti-gay, but that doesn't mean I spoke up for homosexuals either. And I don't think my generation understands how heavy the issue is when they use the word "gay" so lightly. It's degrading. People say "We don't mean it in that way." But where the hell was it derived from? That's what I thought. It's absolutely not okay. And once I watched The Times of Harvey Milk, I felt it was time for me to actually do something about it. I broke my habit immediately. I tried and still try to show people my understanding behind it, why it's so horrifying but I haven't come close to affecting anyone, unlike Harvey Milk. Harvey Milk was a tremendous role model of the gay community. He meant so much to others. Because of Harvey, gays knew it was okay to be themselves. And I'm not saying because of Milk, I am able to express who I am but I know who I want to be and what I want to stand for. When I ask others to consider using other words than "That's so gay," they respond, "Are you offended? Are you gay? Why does it matter?" Yes, I am offended! Just because I'm not gay doesn't mean I'll tolerate such depersonalization and degradation. It's a fundamental belief of mine and it does matter, it matters tremendously. In Harvey Milk I have found an idol. Milk was someone who wasn't afraid to make a difference, someone who wasn't going to curb his tongue, someone who doesn't plan on letting anything or anyone take them down. Although I am obliged to use past tense in describing my role model, I feel Harvey Milk has affected me in a way no one else can. Because of Milk, I have made a promise to always keep the fight alive in me and not to fear initiatives towards change. Because of my Harvey Milk, I am a step closer to defining exactly who I want to be.

Hello, How do things go? Well it's monday, about fourty minutes until Big Bang starts. I just made my dad a Facebook account. No worries, he'll never go on :) bahaha. Let's see today I volunteered at the Grotto. But, I thought it was going to be more interactive than raking 17 millions piles of leaves. Whatever. So today was the deadline for OSAC. Didn't finish. Only because I was lazy and never got my transcript. Plus, i'm so sick of writing, I wish writing college essays were as easy as blogging. This is just so much more entertaining. Oh today! Me and Selina went out to lunch (subway) and on our way back to the Grotto we saw Brandon's house. Looks like they painted it like a green color or something. Pretty interesting. I'm excited for this week. I don't know why because nothing important is going on. but yah, it's probably just because i'm so busy. and I'm high on life :). you know why :) last night i was busy looking back on my blog, and then i went as far as my notes all throughout middle school :) Carmen + 16 = ♥ bahahahaha. tell me that's not the funniest thing you've heard. I think I've finally decided on how I want to ask him "] and i already blogged about that.. so i don't want any more spoilers. Hmm, what now? Well I really want to write a letter to Kylar. And I think I'm going to tonight. Hopefully I don't have any really big assignments, because I didn't do any homework over the weekend. BAHAH how I always screw myself over! So just like 15 minutes ago I was reading 16's sister's blog. Damn, is she a good writer!! Yah I really hope it's not awkward, you know the night of. That would be really unfortunate if it was.. I don't really want to tell anyone, because what if it's not set in stone. Okay no more negativity. I really love this orange blog, it makes me so happy. Then again, I haven't blogged sad or mad yet. Maybe it'll affect that :) bahaha. we'll see. I have four more minutes until big bang, so let me try to wrap it up. I cannot wait for the movie next week with Cante, seriously gonna be so great. :) Shoooooot I still need to message ♥inger! I should probably do that REAL soon! This might be the longest blog I've ever written. Or close to the longest blog. I can't believe it's already gonna be the 17th tomorrow. That actually makes me a little sad. Hmm... I need to write my speech. Ugh! Alright well i should wrap up so I can go back and read it real quick. Will blog soon xoxo, Carmen ♥