I don't use this diary anymore. I'm over on virtue49 now but my friend reminded me I had this diary. It's crazy to sit here and relive all of the past entries. I was such an angry person.

So, I'm monumentally pissed. It's about Sean again. I've already said that I love Sean to pieces and I do. I'd do anything for him. And the fact that people are saying shit about him, really aggravates me. Today he told people he has a girlfriend. They've been dating for about a week or 2 now but he didn't really wanna go telling too many people because then everyone would be going "omg you guys are soooo cute!" And that just gets annoying. Plus, if it didn't work out, well, that would suck. But I guess someone tried to ruin it. She's saying it's all pretend. Which it's not. But the fact that she says that, proves that she's stupid and can't mind her own business. I really don't like her. I mean, I could tolerate her and deal with her. I even started to get her on my good side after she took Sean's side and helped him out. But no. This pushes it. She spreads so much shit about everyone. I have a source that's friends with her too. No names. So X (the first person) tells Y all of these secrets. X makes Y promise never to tell. Then Y comes to me, makes ME promise never to tell, and I don't. But X does this every time. She is not capable of keeping her mouth shut. And seriously, if she's telling Y stuff, wouldn't she also be telling stuff ABOUT Y? And about me? And about Sean? Yes it does. It pisses me off. Like every bit of gossip I'm not supposed to know, I learned from Y who heard it from X. Sean thought trust meant something in a friendship. First he was let down by Julia saying he was gay. Which he's obviosuly not. And then X decides to say he's faking. The poor kid has been let down by 2 of his close friends and that upsets me beyond words. Trust should mean something and anyone that can't learn to be trustworthy by now, should be castrated with the false rumor starters. I mean, how elementary is this? People, this is fucking high school. It's not second grade where you sit around spreading rumors. We should be way past that by now. But then again, those people are freshman so they haven't learned the lesson the hard way. I learned it in 8th grade and now I'm good. Most people learn it earlier. But these 2 bitches (not Y) are so immature and irresponsible. And they like spreading around rumors. I mean, really people, if you wanna EVER get respect, don't be a backstabbing bitch. That just makes people like me, and all of Sean's other friends, hate you. I'm out. I need to go help my friend through his crisis that should never have fucking happened.

Marriage is love. I'm for gay marriage. I'm sitting here watching MTV News Now about it and I'm pretty pissed. Anyone that knows me knows I am not gay. But I have some pretty close friends that are and nobody has a right to deny them marriage. First of all, people are going on about how "the founding fathers did not write the constitution to allow for gay marriages" blah blah blah. Okay, well they weren't really in favor of a lot of things back then. It's 2004 okay? Things are just a little bit different now. In 1968, a poll showed that people were against interracial dating. They thought it should be a crime for a white person to marry an Asian but that has changed. Now it should be legal for a man to marry a man. I'm able to admit that I'm still a little uncomfortable seeing a man kiss a man because I've never actually been subject to that until recently. But I think they have a right just like every other person to get married. The government is supposed to be about making the States better for when WE grow up. I realize not everything is about us because the majority of youth can't even drive a car but we all have opinions. And in ten or twenty years, WE will be the ones in charge and the government should check on what we think because if they put it in the Constitution that gay people cannot be wed, we'll just have to change it. They aren't really polling the younger people but MTV did and 55% were in favor of gay marriage. A lot of adults are as well and we should be taken into consideration. Bush runs on a lot about faith as do most people. There was a clip of this group standing outside a church with a Bible in one hand protesting about how gay marriage is unholy. But aren't gay people protected by the seperation of church and state? The "founding fathers" thought that church and state should be seperate and atheists even tried changing the Pledge of Allegiance because it had "one nation, under God". Okay, so if they can change that why can't we accept gay marriage? Church has no place in this because it LEGALLY does not have a place in this. So all those cases should legally be ignored. Unless of course the government wants to change the constitution so that church is joined with state but they can't do that. People are also saying that the definition of marriage is between a man and a woman. It doesn't say that. It says it's "having a husband or wife." Okay, so if a gay couple marries, they have a husband. The OR in there really sums things up. A person should be able to choose whether or not they get a husband or they get a wife. I realize that it really does refer to a man and a woman but if I see it that way, there's a flaw. It's all in how it gets viewed. Like in psychology we did this thing where Mrs. Collins wrote "Women without her man is nothing." That can be seen 2 ways. It could be "Women, without her man, is nothing." Or it could be taken as "Women, without her, man is nothing." See? It's all in how you look at it and I choose to look at the dictionary definition of marriage as having a husband OR a wife. So now I've thrown out all church cases and all definition cases. What else is there? Moral cases. Okay, well you know what? That's usually based on church and religion. But take a step out of that if you can. I know it's hard, I'm semi-religious as well. But if you take a step back and look at it, gay people aren't aliens. They aren't trying to go out and murder people. They aren't even trying to change the way other families are. They just want their OWN families. Who would it be hurting if they got married? Nobody. You can't say they'd be hurting you because they wouldn't be. So there isn't even a case to go with. We have so many discrimination acts. There's the sex-based discrimination act where you cannot be discriminated against just because you're a man or a woman. If there's a woman police officer, she has every right to work the most dangerous job as a man does if she's qualified. And they can't legally hire a man over a woman. There's also the race discrimination. Basically gays are the blacks of today. Seriously. It may not be as horrendous as it was for black people and maybe it isn't EXACTLY the same. But at the same time, it's pretty damn close. Why didn't people want blacks to be equal with them? Well, for one thing, they were scared. And they thought that black people were a lower class. That they didn't have a RIGHT to be even with them. That's what's happening with gays now. People are scared to be on even terms with gay people and they think that gay people are wrong in their thinking. But don't gays have a right to legally be married? Yes, they do. Just like blacks had the right to be equal with whites and then gained the right to MARRY a white person. They said on MTV that if it wasn't legalized now, it would be in 20 years. Do you know why? Because the youth of the nation can SEE that it's wrong to discriminate against gay people. Young people are more open-minded than almost all of the adults in our country and they can see the wrongdoing that's going on with the government opposing gay marriage. If you look at it, the government is full of old people. Not necessarily 70 or 80 but the majority of the government is over 40 or 50 years old. I'll admit I haven't researched to actually find out but I saw a clip of the congress or senate and the majority of the heads were white and gray. So that makes them fairly old. Most of those people were around back when it wasn't okay for Asians to marry whites. Hell, some of them were even around when it still wasn't accepted that black people were equal. So you'd think that they would realize by now that it isn't fair to discriminate against anyone, whether it be because of gender, race, or sexual preference. It just isn't right. Legally, gay marriage should be allowed. If you look at the pure, basic legal laws, gay marriage would be allowed. But now people are bringing religion and everything into it when there's no right. There's not one good reason why the legalization of marriage should not be happening.

Yeah, still pissed. And I did REALLY bad at my golf meet. Like REALLY really bad.

So fucking pissed beyond any normal comprehension. So, Sean is probably my best friend. There are things I've told him that I haven't said to Kourt or Andrea and I have yet to get annoyed with him. I trust him with my life and I hope he feels the same. But I don't even care because that's how much I love him. It's like having... I dunno. He's just really important to me and when people hurt him, I get really upset. And he's hurting now. He'd probably never admit it to anyone else but I know him so well that it's obvious. Some stupid little bitch, decided to tell her health class that Sean's gay. Now pretty much everyone thinks he's gay. Like Kristy heard about it, Andrea Struble, and it doesn't even matter how many people heard. Enough is enough. You know, Sean's not gay. If anybody knew him, they'd see that he's just a nice guy. And even if he was, who the fuck is Julia to go around telling people? My God. That's just stupid. Seriously. I would LOOOOOVE to meet her at the compost piles. I wouldn't even care if I got in trouble for it. If they wanted to put me in jail, I'd do it for Sean because he does not deserve to have stupid shit spread about him. Oh God, people, you don't even understand what it's like. I'm more mad about this than I was about Mike going to prom with Liana. And more pissed than my golf score today. I'm just beyond the right words right now. You don't ever do that to Sean though. I would move mountains for him because he's such a genuine person and he means THAT much to me. He's my best friend. Like a soul mate type of friend and NOBODY is allowed to make him feel like shit. Oh man. I wanna take her to the compost piles right now. I would so kick her ass because that's how livid I am right now. NOBODY ever does that to him. Ever. If anybody ever tries to hurt him again, seriously, I would not tolerate it. I'm barely holding this in. Maybe if it was true, it wouldn't be that bad. But it's not.

To all of you anonymous note people, go away. Unless of course you're nice. I realize that it's partially my fault because I leave my note comment area open to everyone but that's more out of convenience for like Kristy so she doesn't have to sign in every time she wants to know what's going on in my life. But really. If the only pleasure you get in your day, is by leaving anonymous bitching notes on my diary or on my friend's diary, you're just asking to be made fun of, hated, and eventually you will die. Nice to know, isn't it.

Well, it arrived. I had my mini breakdown. It was right after school thank God. I had practice, Sarah's senior project to learn, and then 10 pages of comp to do. But I've got it semi-figured out. When I got home, the family pissed me off because they told me the printer was out of ink so I was basically screwed. But we're okay now. I've done everything but the paper so far. I even payed off my movie fee ($7.40) and got a Subway application. It just sucks because I work until whenever. We don't have set times that we get home so I can't put on a set time of workable hours. That's why I'm not doing golf next year. I'd quit now if it wouldn't screw the team over. I'm just miserable now. Enough about this though, I have 5 pages to write. I've decided I'll just write the second 5 and redo the WHOLE thing later. It'll suck, but that's my plan. Anyways, I'll chat with you some other time.

I'm being stretched way too thin. I know that in the movies they always talk about how it feels like this thing is just stretching them from one side of a room to another or that kind of thing and I can FINALLY relate to that. It sucks, but I can relate. My plans Monday were let up a little so it wasn't as bad. But I had percussion ensemble, school, practice, dance, a comp packet, psych, Spanish, and would've had 5 pages of comp to write but she postponed it. Then I didn't even bother doing ANY of it. I did nothing. Not a thing. This morning I finished my comp packet. Then I did the academic thing, practice, and now here I am again. My mom is telling me to either clean my room or work on my comp pages due Thursday but I can't right now. Then tomorrow I have school, practice, and then I go to Sarah's to learn this colorguard routine for her senior project. I also have to do the 5 pages either tonight or tomorrow. And I have to rewrite the first 5 because they just sucked. Thursday I also have early percussion ensemble. I realize that doesn't sound like a lot. And when I really sit here and think about it, it isn't. But thinking about something and actually experiencing it is so much different. I just don't know how much more I can take and I feel like crap because I've had enough breakdowns this year. Earlier I had one where I went to Andrea's at like the beginning of the year. It was really bad. Then I had another after my dad yelled at me. And again I went over to Andrea's. Now I can tell there's another one coming up but I feel like I can't go to Andrea's because her parents are splitting and I'd feel bad going over my own problems. God I don't know. I need a break. That sounds so fucking pathetic. Dude, I just got back from Mexico. But that didn't even count because the whole time we were there, it was constant action. I've not really had one break all year. Everything just keeps slamming and slamming. And next year will be worse. Because on top of everything, I'll be co-editor of yearbook. I'm already getting shit dumped on me. I understand that not everybody has a ride and that plans can change at the last minute. I understand that because it's happened to me before. I'm just sick of the fact that if someone can't take pictures, I'M stuck doing it. If someone needs a ride, I have to either pick them up or cover them. I'm just tired. And I get nothing for what I do. Not a thing. Like, if so-and-so sells all their ads, we all get to have an ice cream party. And if Nicole and Kourtney finish the Senior Memory Book, good for them! But hey, I mean, I drive my car 100 miles a week for pictures and that's just nice. Then I get a no credit for not having things spelled right. Maybe I just feel like I'm not appreciated. Nothing I do ever seems to be good enough. I mean, I have a lot of shit. I have percussion ensemble, band, yearbook, Spanish, comp, AP History, golf, Sarah's senior project, dance, and occasionally I work on the weekends. And now I wanna apply for a job at Subway because I need a steady flow of cash. So naturally, I come home, am dead, and I lay in bed for a while, reading, and trying to relax for the first time of the day when my mom knocks, says I better either be cleaning my room or working on comp, and walks away. Great. Thank you mom for making my day MORE stressful. And then she tells me that there's no excuse for my room being a mess, I can't have THAT much homework, I don't do enough to be exhausted, and basically just calls me a lazy, whining bitch and walks away from the door for me to sit there wondering just how much more my life could suck. Oh yeah, and on top of that, I have to worry about my friends. Next year, they'll all be gone. Kourtney will be at Northwestern, Nicole at Central, and Andrea at Baker. When will I be seeing them? Not much. Yes, Kourtney will be home on weekends and such but I'm busy on weekends and I wouldn't be able to see her all the time. Basically I'm realizing that I'm losing my best friends. People say that best friends always lose touch once they go to college. Kourtney and the gang have said that won't be us but everybody ALWAYS says that and it ALWAYS happens to them. Like my mom still talks to her best friend through e-mails every now and again but that's it. It's always because they go to college, meet new things/ people, and just lose touch. It's nobody's fault; it just happens. And that's what scares me. I've braced myself. I really have. Like I'm just telling myself I WON'T be seeing them really ever again as much as what I am right now. Nothing will ever be the same. I don't like knowing that my best friends in the whole world, are about to go off and leave me behind here in Rosco. I still have Kristy, Sean, and Lisa with me but it's different. Kourtney and Andrea were like my soulmate friends I guess. And next year they'll both be gone and I'll still be here. Wow. So I've now given myself new problems. Thank you Carla, what a great person you are to yourself. I'm outta here. My mom is now bitching because since I'm not doing homework, she gets to kick me off and use the phone. And she can't POSSIBLY call my aunt at 10:00 even though she's called HERE at like 10:30 before. No, that's just innapropriate. Alright. Tears have started so I'm gonna go hop in the shower and rid myself of them. Bye bye.

So I just got back from dance class, yes, dance class and I'm just feeling like writing something. And yes, I also realize I spelled separation wrong with my last entry. Thank you for pointing that out even though nobody did. Real smart people, real smart. So right, dance class. I'm a little nervous. Our recital is May 22nd. I missed last week because I was taking yearbook pictures and Saturday there's like a little dance workshop from 10-1 and I'm supposed to be there. That wouldn't be a problem but of course there's a but. I'm supposed to work from 9-5. Technically we open at 10 but we're still always there an hour early. If anyone wants to come see me, I work at the Bookworm across from Glens. *hint hint* Right. So Gaye (dance instructor) wants me to come just until 11. I'm gonna talk to my boss but I dunno if I can do it. I also had to tell her that Nina's backing out of dance because she has steel band rehearsal, New York, and all this other crap. Yeah, steel band can always be rescheduled so I don't see how that one applies. But New York works. We're all upset because we have this dance that requires a partner and she just totally screwed hers over. I'm bitchy. On top of that, our Coach made us stay outside for asslong today. It was so dumb. We just stood there for like 40 minutes before she decided we could leave. Real smart idea there Coach. Oh! And we have a meet coming up on a Monday! I have DANCE on Monday. If they interfere, I'm not going to the meet. A) I PAY for dance. B) Our recital is May 22 and we REALLY need the work. This is bullshit. I'm so annoyed right now.

Why does it seem that love never sticks? You see these people and you start talking them and think to yourself about how happy they seem and how you wish that you could be that happy. And then, it turns out, there are problems. Not just normal problems like he forgot to take out the trash and she didn't buy the right kind of toilet paper, but deep emotional problems that aren't fixable. Where am I going with this? I have a destination for once. Andrea, my best friend, has been having a tough life. She's the friend that I always go to for my biggest problems. I normally don't go to Kourt because she hadn't been through depression and wasn't quite able to understand. But Kourtney and I both have dubbed Andrea's house as our second home. I even call her parents Mom and Dad and I love them to pieces. I got that they were having problems. I could tell. But she asked him to move out by the end of next week! How? Why? I don't understand. I mean, they had their share of problems but I always thought they'd love each other. This sucks. It's like my own family. My dad sleeps in the basement because it's the closest he can get to moving out without ACTUALLY moving out. My guess is because it's cheaper. I just don't get it. I mean, you make vows. When you say "I do" it means forever. People aren't supposed to split up. It shouldn't be happening. And that's exactly what's happening! It makes me sad. And Andrea was contemplating not going to college next year so she could stay home and help out. She'd obviously be miserable and she shouldn't have to. As much as I don't want her going for my own selfish reasons of missing her, I don't want her to stay here and be a parent. It's not her responsibility. Love is just supposed to be unbreakable. Once you fall in love, it shouldn't be allowed that you fall back OUT of love. No! You're supposed to look at your partner and see their beauty despite their weaknesses. And you shouldn't have to fall anywhere away from that. If she drinks too much, work through it. If he works too much, SAY something. Don't just let it go on and on until there's nothing there. That's not good. That's not good for either person in the couple, it's not good for their children, and it's not good for Kourtney and me. Dammit they should be happy together!

First off, I just wanna say that people are dumb. Oh wait, have I already said that? Well, a comment about my last entry totally confirmed that. So supposedly my diary is "but fucking ugly". Alright, that's cool. I can respect it if people don't like the same things I do but if you wanna make the insult more effective, learn how to spell. And the comment "I think your totally gay" is so ignorant. I'm not gay. I even bitched about how a guy I like didn't wanna go to prom with me. And even if I WAS gay, fuck you. You're even more ignorant by using gay as an insult and I hope someone kicks your ass for it. Saying "that's gay" is like saying "oh, that's black." You don't do that because you know you'd get your ass kicked. So I REALLY hope you have a huge gay man in your school, he hears you saying that, and he attacks you in the middle of a darkened alley. And all just because you were stupid. Moving on... When I lose out on sleep, I get slightly hyper for some reason. Like I'm trying to keep myself awake or something like that. Anyways, I was really jumpy today because I had to wake up an hour early for percussion ensemble. Kourtney was crabby and we just clashed so she ended up pissing me off. Not a huge deal though. I bought my prom ticket. Not really exciting either. I guess everything worth mentioning happened after school. Golf practice was fine. We were all really pissed because tomorrow we have a meet in Alpena so we're leaving the bus garage at like 6:30 AM and on top of that we're playing 18 holes instead of just 9. Whatever. But originally we were supposed to go with Grayling and most of the Grayling golf players are bitches. But it turns out that we won't be going with them due to lack of communication. You'd think that would make my life happiness wouldn't you? Oh but if only it were that easy. I went to Mexico for spring break, I don't know if I mentioned that. But I did. Our Spanish Club went to Merida, Valladolid, Playa del Carmen, and Cancun for spring break. We left on a Thursday, came back on a Thursday but on Saturday my camera started to act up. We all just figured it was the heat and the humidity so Mr. Hofer said that he thought my camera was still working. I realize it's not his fault or anything because he's not a camera expert so I won't blame it on him at all. I came back with 12 rolls but I figured about 4 would be wasted on Saturday from trying to fix my camera. So we turned in the earlier rolls awhile ago and most of them turned out. Recently we turned in my last 4 that were taken AFTER the camera got fucked up. Not ONE of them worked. Not ONE fucking roll turned out. Now obviously they didn't charge me anything or I'd have kicked them in the shins and run but I'm so fucking pissed off. 4 whole rolls of film are gone. I'm seriously depressed right now. I cried. I fucking crawled into my bed, hugged my little teddy bear, and I bawled because I wanted those pictures. Souvenirs are one thing but pictures are entirely different. Thank God Mr. Williams is copying some of his pictures for us so I'm just gonna be receiving like all of his. But still. That means that my $400 camera is broken. It's 4 fucking months old! How the hell?! The last time it really worked was at Progresso Beach. I went into the water and had Sarah and Liz take some pictures of me. While Sarah was taking them, I guess the thing started to act up so she put it down. I was in the water the whole fucking time. It worked right up until when they used it. I'm not saying it was their fault because obviously it wasn't but still. I'm fucking enraged. Can you tell I like the word fuck? Just a little bit. This is my blurty to be truly angry at the world though. If I said this anywhere else, people would start to think I need medical help. Maybe I do. We'll see where it goes. I recently wrote a comp paper about my depression. We're supposed to start with an "exploding moment" which is really just a little scene where you put the person in the moment. So I started mine with blood dripping onto my new jeans as I frantically searched for band aids, neosporin, and a bandana for my wrist. Then I switched to talking about when I became depressed, how I used to dig in with my thumb nail (a less obvious way of cutting), and how one night I cut with an actual knife. That was the last night I cut. Then I finally got help. Well, then I finally came clean to my family. Of course they had no idea. But the paper was supposed to be about courage and it took courage back then to come out about what I'd done, and it also took a lot of courage to go back and relive it in order to write it. I don't know what to do with myself. I wanna go running but then I have to take the dog nad we have no place to go. I realize that's probably the stupidest thing I've ever said and you'd agree with me if you knew where I live. But I don't wanna run on the road or where anyone could see me so chances are I'll just go in the basement, blast some music, and run on the treadmill. God it's so repetitive. It sucks. Oh, and I've decided never to talk to Cody again. Well, at least not about anything I'm passionate about. There are 2 things that I will fight to the death over. The first one is that abortions should be illegal because it's murder. The second is that gay people should have all equal rights- INCLUDING marriage. Actually, all rights ESPECIALLY marriage. I would love to be a lawyer just for the gay marriage case because I've turned down every legal objection a person could have. So, anonymous noter, if you'd be so kind as to leave your name next time, we can have a lovely little chat about your ignorance and your closed-mindedness. Enjoy.

Hey people. So this is my venting journal. If you don't like crabbiness, this probably isn't the best place for you. Especially because this whole entry will by bitching. Anyways, really only one person I know is gonna be reading this because, well, there are things about me that nobody else is allowed to know. We had a SADD assembly yesterday and it was about the yellow ribbon. I dunno if you've heard of it (assuming there is a YOU reading this entry) but anyways, there motto is "It's okay to ask for help." And I totally agree with that. It is okay. It's just a pain in the ass because there's never an easy or better way of doing it. Like, take me, for instance. I fell into depression in 8th grade. My parents found out because a friend told the assistant principle, who drove me home one day to help me explain to my parents. It resulted in nothing really. I momentarily felt better because the weight was gone but they didn't do anything to help me. I tell people I'm taking medication just because it keeps them off my back. The only meds I use are tylenol or midol. As I'm sure you guys are dying to know. Right, so back to me. Because I don't talk about myself enough in my daily life. (Yes, that was written with an eye roll.) I know myself really well. I would hope so seeing as how I've lived with me for 17.4 years. But I know when I'm happy, depressed, high, or just loopy. Actually, for the record, I've never been high but I'm sure if I were, I'd know it was the drug and not me just being stupid. Anywho. I'm not depressed right now. And I'm truly not in denial either. I'm just in this weird little funk that doesn't seem to like me right now. Don't you love those? It's like my world is going ten times faster than I'm ready for it to and I'm struggling to keep up. I'm also a semi-overacheiver. I'm not in NHS, I don't have honors, I didn't make the honor roll, and I'm not involved in assloads of extracurricular activities. But compared to most of the people in my grade or that I know, I am considered an overacheiver simply because I'm in the tougher classes. Which sucks because there are some I can't keep up with. *coughSpanishcough* Spanish 3 is kicking my ass right now. I have this huge packet thingy due tomorrow and I've done like 2.5 pages out of like 6. Fun times. Band is raping me as well. I play percussion and was put on a snare part for the concert. That's all happiness for the people that usually play snare but usually I'm put on mallets or auxilary. Snare terrifies me. So now I have that added lovely weight. Prom's Saturday. Wanna know my schedule? Well, seeing as how I just decided to actually go TODAY, I really don't have a great one. Let's see, I work from 9-5. I'm working at the Bookworm in town and all these stupid people come in at 10 to 5 even though we should be CLOSING at 5. But no, that's the perfect time for them. Anyways, I've stayed 1.5 hours late because of people like that. So I work till 5. Dinner at Kourtney's STARTS at 5 so I'll be late. Then I have to change there and get somebody to fix my hair into something that does not resemble a bird's nest. God I'm freaking out over nothing. It's prom. Prom sucked ass last year. Why go again? Well, the main reason is because they put these things on the wall saying who's with who and if you go alone, you get to put a celebrity with you. Yes, so my sole purpose of paying $20 for a fucking prom ticket, is so I can go with Johnny Knoxville. But hey, he's sexy so I don't care. Moving on... My mom's been flipping out because my room's a mess. Okay. That's nice and all because it WAS pretty shitty. But, in my defense, my room was clean for over a month. Then I went to Mexico and when I got home, I was tired. I didn't feel like putting shit away and since then, I've had so much crap to do. I practice till about 6 now. I play golf and Coach likes to have us play all 9 holes before we can leave. So really we go till 6:30 by the time I get home. Then I have homework. Then I have scrapbooking before I forget all of my Mexican adventures. And by the time I get home from practice, I'm already wiped out. So then after all that I'm supposed to clean my room? Sorry, I need a break every now and again. But my mom says it's no excuse because she does more than I do. That's no excuse either. Totally different situations. That's my main pissiness right now. Oh, and about prom. Last little thing. So I work up so hard to find out if Mike would say yes to me asking him to prom. I had people find out if he wanted to go and he knew it was ME that wanted to know. But he said no because he didn't wanna have to spend any money. Well then on Monday I guess he decided to go with Liana. I don't care that he's going with her; I'm just mad that he told me a lie about the whole money thing. That part of it sucks. Then he said he was getting a haircut and after I asked why, he said "Oh for pr... just because." Right... okay. Anyways, my venting is done. I'm done. It's bed time and I don't have Spanish homework complete. Well, kiss my ass. I'm exhausted.