I feel so fucking depressed right now. I don't really truly even know why ... I mean, I guess I'm pretty sad because I'm barely talking to anyone any more and I feel like I'm loosing everyone again, just like all of the previous years, though it's not like I totally loose them. I feel like I'm seperately myself from everyone ... like I'm afraid that someone's going to break me ... I don't even know how to explain, it's just wierd and very very annoying. I don't want to be depressed, I want to be happy, but I can't force myself either ... cause that'll just hurt mroe ... DAMN IT ALL!! Music is and isn't my only escape ... HOW THE HELL DID THIS HAPPEN AGAIN?!?!?! FUCK! Cadence